In answer to the OP's post, im gone already. Just waiting on my wife to join me. Waiting on Spousal visa etc...
The tipping point for me was when I stepped back and truly looked at everything around me. Seeing contempt in other peoples' eyes just because I have a nice watch on. Having hawkers stare into my car through the window, assessing whether I am a good target for future smash and grabs or hijackings. Catching myself looking over my shoulder all the time, checking to see who the footsteps belong to and how intently they are following me. There are many other things, but those situations describe life in SA all the time.
It took me a long time to step back and realize that this was the life I was living. Its not about paranoia, or genocide. Its simply about quality of life. I realized that the quality of my own life was not at the level that I wanted it to be, and looking to the future, it never would be. Life is getting harder and harder in SA, too many people stubbornly defend the country out of some missplaced sense of loyalty or pride. People need to realize that life is going downhill there, downhill does not mean that genocide is at the bottom mind you. Just that life is getting more and more difficult, and less manageable, regardless of race.
Everyone has a different breaking point, some are pushed over the edge by a hijacking, murder, robbery, etc.... I just feel sad for the people that wait until they are slapped across the face with a reality check like that. Some people may be pushed over the edge when they look at starting a family and plan to the future, as I was. A major factor for me was looking at the quality of education that my child/ren would get. Also the chances of them being able to succeed in an AA driven society. I simply realized that I could not put my kids through that if I could help it.
My only hope is that people in SA are not holding on for the wrong reasons. Because if you are, the chances are high that you will find yourself or your loved ones on the wrong end of a violent crime, before you realize your mistake. And it will haunt you for the rest of your life.