Being a Gentleman...

[HavocXphere]

being a gentleman, with 'the ladies', is indirect sexism.

So I should rather be an @sshole?

 

[wcoetzee]

So I should rather be an @sshole?

nope, just not a gentleman.

 

[Ou grote]

nice guys ( gentlemen ) finish last

Nice guys finish.

 

[Syndyre]

People actually do that?

In that case I'm gonna get a walking stick or hire a kid

Not in Gauteng they don't. If you're in the queue first, the old lady can wait her turn just like everyone else.

Same here, maybe we're just jaded.

 

[stoke]

I'm for it, having a bit of difficulty finding a role-model though.

 

[w1z4rd]

Its always in to be a gentleman.. it shows your breeding and education. Saying this.. doesn't mean you have to constantly go balls out with it.. just be a decent man with manners. Otherwise you look cheap and common.

 

[Syndyre]

Its always in to be a gentleman.. it shows your breeding and education. Saying this.. doesn't mean you have to constantly go balls out with it.. just be a decent man with manners. Otherwise you look cheap and common.

Sure but if you constantly let other people in front of you in the queue you won't get very far, literally.

 

[stoke]

Thank you for letting me post first Wiz.

 

[w1z4rd]

hehe

 

[w1z4rd]

Sure but if you constantly let other people in front of you in the queue you won't get very far, literally.

Yeah, clearly one has to use reason when applying it, just like everything else in life.

 

[bwana]

Good manners dont cost a thing.

I always let old ladies with zimmermans go before me in a que. Got my heel damaged from one once.

As good a reason as any

I'm a nice guy (gentlemen) and i usually finish first.

Must be a hit with the ladies.

 

[Syndyre]

God manners dont cost a thing.

Isn't calling yourself a God a bit arrogant?

Must be a hit with the ladies.

LOL.

 

[bwana]

Isn't calling yourself a God a bit arrogant?

**Sigh** I suppose so

. . . fixed

 

[Ozymandias]

I'm all for it. It costs nothing and small gestures are generally acknowledged with a smile in this country. South Africans have some of the best manners across all walks of life, compared with other countries that I have visited.

 

[Nick333]

i am ( was) a gentleman against girls, does not help with getting booty or a girlfriend in any way these days. they just walk over you and take you for a ride ( buy me a drink ...... they say, only after free drinks ect. )
bs.

Some guys seem to confuse being a gentleman with being a pu$$y. The correct ( gentlemanly) response when a girl/woman/lady asks you to buy her a drink is:

"I would love to buy you a drink. Why don't I get the second round. Mines a scotch on the rocks."

 

[Maelly]

Do any of you gentle souls open your female friends a car door? I used not to, until wifey mentuioned that ... "Hhhm, that guy is such a gentleman, look he opens a car door for his other half". Thats when it dawn to me that I should start doing it. Now I do it all the time, if I happen to forget then wifey should remind me by standing outside. I'm now getting used to it.



Otherwise I do all the gentleman-like stuff there is to do...

 

[|tera|]

Do any of you gentle souls open your female friends a car door? I used not to, until wifey mentuioned that ... "Hhhm, that guy is such a gentleman, look he opens a car door for his other half". Thats when it dawn to me that I should start doing it. Now I do it all the time, if I happen to forget then wifey should remind me by standing outside. I'm now getting used to it.



Otherwise I do all the gentleman-like stuff there is to do...

That's really good of you Maelly. I think of it this way, there's this "butch" old oomie and he usually treats his wife like a filthy rag, then you parked next to him, as you return to your car, you open the door for your wife and this oomie "stares" at you, little does he know, he's learning a life lesson and little do you know, you helped him with it.

But keep on doing it, not to be seen, but because you love and respect your wife.

 

[DJ...]

Do any of you gentle souls open your female friends a car door? I used not to, until wifey mentuioned that ... "Hhhm, that guy is such a gentleman, look he opens a car door for his other half". Thats when it dawn to me that I should start doing it. Now I do it all the time, if I happen to forget then wifey should remind me by standing outside. I'm now getting used to it.



Otherwise I do all the gentleman-like stuff there is to do...

You must be quite flexible to fit around her entire pinkie finger

I am not really a gentleman but it certainly does work for me.

I do open car doors every now and then (but only because I dont want their long nails scratching my paint job or if they are carrying my house keys)

I often buy women drinks but make it clear as to why I am paying for their drinks. I tell them I trying to get them drunk so I can look prettier to them. This works really well and often results in a response along the lines of "I dont need to be drunk" and it plays out thereafter quite easily (It worked last night). I have convinced myself that the "I might need something stronger" response is just a woman with a sense of humour.

I make a point of always saying please and thank you. Although I hardly have to beg and they find "thank you" the morning after somewhat offensive as well.

I do not allow old people in front of me in queues for 2 reasons. Firstly, they smell a lot worse from behind. Secondly, I dont want land up stuck behind them in traffic.

I will not enter an old fashioned type of relationship. In this day and age I find being a gentleman for the sake of tradition somewhat of a ridiculous idea. It was borne out of sexism and if it continues because of tradition, then it will remain a sexist gesture, not matter what the intentions. If someone is struggling and there is something I can do to help, then I do the RIGHT thing, not gentlemanly thing. Such as holding a door to allow (regardless of sex) someone through who cannot open it for themselves or if it doesnt put me out in any way (such as being late). I will help the elderly or those with kids to carry their shopping or pack it in their car if need be. Everyone else is very capable of performing these functions without help. I will help if someone requests it and it is not an absurd request. Etc, etc...

I dont get the whole gentleman thing at all. In a day and age where we should all be equal, then holding on to sexist ideals is a step in the wrong direction. I believe you just use right and wrong and a little bit of empathy instead.

 

[The_Unbeliever]

Is it "in" enough to be a gentleman these days?

I'm not speaking about getting a girlfriend or that regard, but in your daily life as well.

I'm fortunate to have a fairly good role model of a real gentleman in my personal life, he's a great guy and I've known him for a few years.

I fail sometimes and where I'm supposed to be the gentleman I let emotions get the better and at other times where it's not specifically required I act the gentleman, very random.

Things like walking to the bank and you see a lady behind you, do you open the door and stand next to it and let her pass through, or do you walk in and let the door slide?

At the grocery store, you see an old guy or a mother and child, do you let them buy first, or do you take your turn which is your right because time shouldn't be wasted?

It's something to muse about I think. I believe if we have more genuine gentlemen, the world will be a better place.

What do you think?

We all should set an example to the younger generation, and be a gentleman.

It will make a difference to the person which you're being courteous to - even though said person won't acknowledge it.

 

[Picard]

I have such good manners that I sometimes even instinctively make way for girls in my primary school to enter a room before me, even though we teach our kids to respect their teachers by making way for them.