Don't take it personally

[cavedog]

Quick question.

When someone says or does something and say don't take it personally doesn't that actually mean that it's already a personal? Why would you say it don't take it personally?

 

[RedViking]

That's exactly the time to take it personally. I usually respond with

"thanks for telling me, please don't be offended by what I'm about to say....."

And then I proceed to say something really offensive, but with a good heart.

 

[FiestaST]

It “operates” in the exact same way as:

No offense but…(then you rail the bloke with insults).

1) It shows tact.
2) Gives the party a heads-up.

 

[RedViking]

It “operates” in the exact same way as:

No offense but…(then you rail the bloke with insults).

1) It shows tact.
2) Gives the party a heads-up.

Please don't take this personally, but you could learn a thing or two from @TopAuto

 

[cavedog]

That's exactly the time to take it personally. I usually respond with

"thanks for telling me, please don't be offended by what I'm about to say....."

And then I proceed to say something really offensive, but with a good heart.

It “operates” in the exact same way as:

No offense but…(then you rail the bloke with insults).

1) It shows tact.
2) Gives the party a heads-up.

So, in a work environment not a personal matter what do one take away from something like this?

I'm fuming to be honest.

 

[FiestaST]

Don't take it personally but your breathe stinks.
Don't take it personally but you smell like schit.
Don't take it personally but your wife is a 2.
Don't take it personally but your kids are dumb.

 

[FiestaST]

Please don't take this personally, but you could learn a thing or two from @TopAuto

 

[PatchTuesday]

Was it followed by some constructive criticism that you could actually work on/with or something you can't really change?

 

[RedViking]

So, in a work environment not a personal matter what do one take away from something like this?

I'm fuming to be honest.

The other person is an idiot?

 

[cavedog]

The other person is an idiot?

That is what I thought. I'm doing the most instead people nitpick on irrelevant stuff and now I'm getting micromanaged to the point where I need to ask permission before sending an email and then my colleagues say don't take it personally yet the people that are actually super incompetent because they do absolutely nothing are cruising along nicely.

If I have to hear one more time don't take it personally or get emotional, I will snap.

 

[RedViking]

That is what I thought. I'm doing the most instead people nitpick on irrelevant stuff and now I'm getting micromanaged to the point where I need to ask permission before sending an email and then my colleagues say don't take it personally yet the people that are actually super incompetent because they do absolutely nothing are cruising along nicely.

If I have to hear one more time don't take it personally or get emotional, I will snap.

That's frustrating.

To be honest most people like to function within a box. That's all they know. Our system is built around putting people in boxes. It's especially bad if you have ever worked with Indians or Filipino's, although I won't say they are incompetent. That's a unique skill in modern South Africa. The new generation can't operate outside of a box.

 

[FiestaST]

So, in a work environment not a personal matter what do one take away from something like this?

I'm fuming to be honest.

Hmm hard to say as every instance is a case by case jobbie.

My 2c says try & be open to the feedback as possible then decide if it’s of actual value or just bull dust.

Then action accordingly.

Additionally it’s more tricky on a few levels.

 

[Vorastra]

Don't take it personally but your breathe stinks.
Don't take it personally but you smell like schit.
Don't take it personally but your wife is a 2.
Don't take it personally but your kids are dumb.

It's ok, bro.

 

[cavedog]

That's frustrating.

To be honest most people like to function within a box. That's all they know. Our system is built around putting people in boxes. It's especially bad if you have ever worked with Indians or Filipino's, although I won't say they are incompetent. That's a unique skill in modern South Africa. The new generation can't operate outside of a box.

I noticed people do like to be boxed and stay in that box. Very sad

Hmm hard to say as every instance is a case by case jobbie.

My 2c says try & be open to the feedback as possible then decide if it’s of actual value or just bull dust.

Then action accordingly.

Additionally it’s more tricky on a few levels.

Some people like really don't give a damn. It can literally be like you are incompetent and they won't even worry about it but I do take fights and issues to heart.

 

[Vorastra]

So, in a work environment not a personal matter what do one take away from something like this?

I'm fuming to be honest.

Who at the Afrihost office said your cable management was bad. It's ok, you can tell us.

 

[FiestaST]

 

[Gone Fishing]

So, in a work environment not a personal matter what do one take away from something like this?

I'm fuming to be honest.

I guess it depends on the relationship and the position of the person who is mentioning this.

If it's a boss, say thank you.
If it's a customer or client, say thank you.
If it's a work colleague, look them in the eyes without blinking and tell them you don't remember asking them for their opinion. Don't break eye contact to assert dominance.

 

[DapperDanMan]

Don't take it personally but your wife is a 2.

No wonder he is fuming.

 

[DapperDanMan]

It's especially bad if you have ever worked with Indians or Filipino's

He's with Rain now?!?

 

[sandwitch]

Quick question.

When someone says or does something and say don't take it personally doesn't that actually mean that it's already a personal? Why would you say it don't take it personally?

If someone is in a leadership position then they have bad communication skills. If it's a coworker kick them in their happy place.
The moment someone says that to you they know they're insulting you but they're trying to make, or justify to themselves, like they're kind and caring. As if they're the better person (than you in all things).

They're like someone who says, "I don't mean to complain but..."