Emotional Counselling?

[Mars]

One of my employees, Lucky, has had a tragic last couple of weeks.

His wife had a seizure one week, was dead the next. He was broken. His children have gone to live with his mother at home (not sure where that is) so he has basically gone from having a complete family to being alone.
My heart bleeds for this guy. On the morning his wife first had her seizure he got her to the hospital and then came to work. He apologized to me for being late and went on with his work. It was only later when I noticed that he was kinda freaking out that I asked him what was going on. Then only did he tell me his wife was in hospital and that he had not slept all night. I sent him home to sleep, tho he went to the hospital instead I'm sure.

Anyway, she died and was buried about 3 weeks ago. We gave him a couple of days off and he is back at work now, going on as usual. The thing is, he looks stressed, and like he is not getting much sleep. When I ask him how he is doing he says he is doing fine.

Is there anything I can do? Without meddling? Maybe he is just mourning, but I'm worried that the guy is heading for a breakdown.

Should I do anything..

 

[OMB]

yes, he's going to need trauma counselling and support in terms of helping him come to terms with what he's going through

 

[Mike Hoxbig]

One of my employees, Lucky, has had a tragic last couple of weeks.

His wife had a seizure one week, was dead the next. He was broken. His children have gone to live with his mother at home (not sure where that is) so he has basically gone from having a complete family to being alone.
My heart bleeds for this guy. On the morning his wife first had her seizure he got her to the hospital and then came to work. He apologized to me for being late and went on with his work. It was only later when I noticed that he was kinda freaking out that I asked him what was going on. Then only did he tell me his wife was in hospital and that he had not slept all night. I sent him home to sleep, tho he went to the hospital instead I'm sure.

Anyway, she died and was buried about 3 weeks ago. We gave him a couple of days off and he is back at work now, going on as usual. The thing is, he looks stressed, and like he is not getting much sleep. When I ask him how he is doing he says he is doing fine.

Is there anything I can do? Without meddling? Maybe he is just mourning, but I'm worried that the guy is heading for a breakdown.

Should I do anything..

He'll definitely need it. If you put yourself in his shoes, I'm sure you would too

Not entirely sure what you can do to help, perhaps arrange to have a counsellor come in to work for a couple of hours every week?

 

[Mars]

He'll definitely need it. If you put yourself in his shoes, I'm sure you would too

Not entirely sure what you can do to help, perhaps arrange to have a counsellor come in to work for a couple of hours every week?

Thats a good idea, trying to find some kind of councilor now.

 

[xrapidx]

Personally - I'd just want time off - I can't imagine someone constantly asking me "How I'm doing" - how the **** do you think I'm doing.... but thats just me

 

[Ryanbighead]

Personally - I'd just want time off - I can't imagine someone constantly asking me "How I'm doing" - how the **** do you think I'm doing.... but thats just me

+1

Suck it up, take the knock, and give the guy some paid leave... he's broken. Pride is a bad thing to have and most men have it. "I'm fine" is a dead give away. This poor bloke is suffering. Being at work is not what he wants or needs.

 

[web]

Personally - I'd just want time off - I can't imagine someone constantly asking me "How I'm doing" - how the **** do you think I'm doing.... but thats just me

+1 but then some people actually need to do something to keep them going otherwise they will completely disintegrate unfortunately everyone deals with these things differently some people might welcome the help others will not.

Ask him if he wants it if he says no then leave him be...

 

[FrankCastle]

Some extra cash for him will go a long way in easing some of his stresses.

 

[ChilliGirl]

Some extra cash for him will go a long way in easing some of his stresses.

He would have had lots of expenses especially if he is black due to the event taking a few days and he would have had to supply food and other things...

 

[wrathex]

Yes, do something. This man cannot afford to lose his job, and will do everything to prevent that from happening, he has 3 kids to provide for and needs a whole new game plan for his life and future, Lucky is in a bad shape right now. -put him in touch with a welfare worker that services his residential area.

 

[ice_cubes]

Send him an email & give him the options mentioned in the thread...maybe he's not the talking kind.

 

[Mars]

Yea I've already helped out financially and offered time off. He didn't want the time off. Actually looked horrified when I suggested it.

I contacted a few people about counselling and found out that because he is an adult they cannot do counselling unless he requests it himself. For me to arrange it for him as his employer would be stepping on his rights apparently.
I can understand how that could be. I suggested to him that he go and see a councilor (at my cost) but again he looked horrified. I kinda felt that I was pushing it then, so I left it there. That was on Tuesday.

Today I'm glad to say he is looking alot better than he was tho.

 

[STS]

Yea I've already helped out financially and offered time off. He didn't want the time off. Actually looked horrified when I suggested it.

I contacted a few people about counselling and found out that because he is an adult they cannot do counselling unless he requests it himself. For me to arrange it for him as his employer would be stepping on his rights apparently.
I can understand how that could be. I suggested to him that he go and see a councilor (at my cost) but again he looked horrified. I kinda felt that I was pushing it then, so I left it there. That was on Tuesday.

Today I'm glad to say he is looking alot better than he was tho.

Work is the best thing to do to keep your mind off what is bringing you down. You have a good employee there and you sound like a very good employer

 

[Waaib]

Is there some kind of training you can send him on. He'll feel like he's progressing and the different environment will be good. the training could benefit you and him. Increased productivity or something like that ...

 

[mercurial]

Terrible coincidence that his name is Lucky

Anyway, I always find utterly retarded that companies only give employees 3 days of "grief leave". WTF is a person supposed to do in 3 days? Two weeks is a lot better.