i need help.

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hxc87x

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so i though i was moving on quite well... everyone thought so...

i was pulling girls with ease, would kiss a few new girls every night i went out and even had a few really hot lays! i've met a lot of fun and sexy girls and even some who i think would rather want me as a **** buddy as a friend (which is pretty awesome) ...so life's not that bad! a bunch of new friends, a bunch of new interesting people in my life...
i finally got to the point where life was simple and easy. no woman, no cry... or something to that effect... i thought.

but last night i saw something that made my whole world collapse. i wanted to die. i felt like ripping my own lungs out and choking on my own blood. i saw myself die, as if i'd stabbed myself through my heart in front of a mirror. i was in my own personal horror movie, starring myself and the person who i never wanted to see again... no words can describe this feeling.
i've only once felt pain, hate and anger like this before...

i saw my ex and her new bf.

now, notice how i wanted to rip out my own lungs? can you imagine what ran through my mind at the time that i saw HIM?

i was very impressed with myself that i managed to keep my cool and shake his hand, i even made some polite convo. we even managed to talk about some rugby (i hate sports)
but then (and he knows that she is MY ex) he deciced to kiss her in front of me. apparently he didnt consider my skinny ass as a threat...

its amazing what you're capable of when you're dead inside, when you really know that you have nothing left to lose. you just abandon all hope and allow yourself to be overwhelmed with hate and anger. you just let your inner psycho explode and nothing can hold you back.
david and goliath has nothing on what followed...
(yeah, i kicked the **** out of his 25yr old jock ass!)

my question now...
how the hell do i get to the point where she means nothing to me anymore?
i've taken all the traditional advice... i've cut her out, i've dated other girls, i've slept with hotter ones... i even have hotter girls chasing me and yet the only one i really care about is this damn f*cking ex!

i dont know what to do anymore!
its been over 2 months, we dated for 2 years. she moved on in 3 weeks.
why the hell cant the guy who was "emotionally detached" detach himself?
all i want to do is to take a golf club to this f*cker's head, but at the same time i'm also just happy that he makes her smile (as cliche as that sounds)

i cant stand this anymore... there's too much **** that's busy f*cking around with my life and i feel that this is actually an issue that i can deal with and sort out... but i need help.

ANY adivice would be greatly appreciated.
 
Bad move on kicking his ass - you look like a prick now man...

hxc87x said:
so i though i was moving on quite well... everyone thought so...

i was pulling girls with ease, would kiss a few new girls every night i went out and even had a few really hot lays! i've met a lot of fun and sexy girls and even some who i think would rather want me as a **** buddy as a friend (which is pretty awesome) ...so life's not that bad! a bunch of new friends, a bunch of new interesting people in my life...
i finally got to the point where life was simple and easy. no woman, no cry... or something to that effect... i thought.

but last night i saw something that made my whole world collapse. i wanted to die. i felt like ripping my own lungs out and choking on my own blood. i saw myself die, as if i'd stabbed myself through my heart in front of a mirror. i was in my own personal horror movie, starring myself and the person who i never wanted to see again... no words can describe this feeling.
i've only once felt pain, hate and anger like this before...

i saw my ex and her new bf.

now, notice how i wanted to rip out my own lungs? can you imagine what ran through my mind at the time that i saw HIM?

i was very impressed with myself that i managed to keep my cool and shake his hand, i even made some polite convo. we even managed to talk about some rugby (i hate sports)
but then (and he knows that she is MY ex) he deciced to kiss her in front of me. apparently he didnt consider my skinny ass as a threat...

its amazing what you're capable of when you're dead inside, when you really know that you have nothing left to lose. you just abandon all hope and allow yourself to be overwhelmed with hate and anger. you just let your inner psycho explode and nothing can hold you back.
david and goliath has nothing on what followed...
(yeah, i kicked the **** out of his 25yr old jock ass!)

my question now...
how the hell do i get to the point where she means nothing to me anymore?
i've taken all the traditional advice... i've cut her out, i've dated other girls, i've slept with hotter ones... i even have hotter girls chasing me and yet the only one i really care about is this damn f*cking ex!

i dont know what to do anymore!
its been over 2 months, we dated for 2 years. she moved on in 3 weeks.
why the hell cant the guy who was "emotionally detached" detach himself?
all i want to do is to take a golf club to this f*cker's head, but at the same time i'm also just happy that he makes her smile (as cliche as that sounds)

i cant stand this anymore... there's too much **** that's busy f*cking around with my life and i feel that this is actually an issue that i can deal with and sort out... but i need help.

ANY adivice would be greatly appreciated.
Click to expand...
 
Well, go to his house, ring the door bell, when he answer, hit him in the nuts very hard and go "YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID!"

And then go home.

Do that at random times. You'll feel better.


FYI, if the girl does the breaking up it usually means she's been thinking about breaking up with you for a few months now. Enter 25yo jock-boy who makes her smile/laugh/pushes all the right buttons. Now she has a "fall back" for when she does break up with you.

At least she had the decency to wait 3 weeks (which isn't long at all, but long enough that you should have gotten over it) before she "moved on". I had a friend of mine's girlfriend that lived with us "move on" to the next guy 2 days after they broke up.

Was ****ing painful to watch as I could just imagine what my friend must've felt.

But dude seriously now... if you were dead inside (like moi) you wouldn't have cared. I extended the hand of friendship, stayed friends, met the new boyfriend etc. She wasn't the one who could handle me being so cool about everything and making friends with her new guy, so she ended the entire relationship.

Maybe move to a new country. That always helps. But I think you did the right thing in beating his ass up. Won't mean you get back together with your ex (who'd want her anyway, she probably had the current guy on "stand by" for a bit, shows how insecure and needy she is), but it sure helped make you feel better right?
 
You beat him up for dating your ex, meanwhile you have been sleeping with a whole bunch of woman? How ironic it would be if you got beat up by one of their exs.
 
Yeah have to agree about the beating, not on and way over the top.
From the sound of it, she probably broke up with you hence the whole emotional turmoil thing. If it was the otherway round, forgetting her would be easy but alas.

I think the thing you need to remind yourself, and although it hurts, is that she is over you, moving on, and well there isnt much that you can do about it, apart from getting her back. Sleeping with a range of other chicks may not help the situation much, unless you meet somebody who can easily replace your ex, and well then memories of your ex slowly dissapear.
I went out with a girl a while ago, just after matric, didnt last long but i was infatuated, we were so alike it was scary, i was inlove - she was everything i could have ever wanted in a woman. Then she dumped me, and i was broken, it took me about 4 or 5 years to eventually get over her. I recently found her on facebook and all those memories came flooding back. The only way ive been able to control my feelings about her is to completely involve myself with my current gf - now im in love again and dont really think of my ex. When i do i say "Whatever whatever" and move on, it really helps.
Have to be able to just say **** It and forget about it, lifes 2 short to waste on a girl who threw you away, her loss your gain.
Find a new Gf, itll do the trick.
 
Prozac is the easy way out.

Anyway, just wanted to correct myself quick. My friend's ex moved on while he was on vacation and lied to him about it when he came back, so when they did break up she jumped on the other guy. I forgot because I think I was pretty drunk at the time or probably didn't want to be involved. I think.

I can't remember much of the last 10 years.
 
AcidRaZor said:
FYI, if the girl does the breaking up it usually means she's been thinking about breaking up with you for a few months now. Enter 25yo jock-boy who makes her smile/laugh/pushes all the right buttons. Now she has a "fall back" for when she does break up with you.?
Click to expand...

Yea that's always got to me : Why do they need the replacement before breaking up with you?

AcidRaZor said:
At least she had the decency to wait 3 weeks (which isn't long at all, but long enough that you should have gotten over it) before she "moved on". I had a friend of mine's girlfriend that lived with us "move on" to the next guy 2 days after they broke up
Click to expand...

I've had a an overlap period ;) Went from my leaving house - straight to drinks with him. So 3 weeks is actually OK ...
 
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You're emotionally detached as a result of the breakup. You need to develop some real feelings towards another girl, not just sleep with her. But as long as you're longing after this ex- you'll never allow that to happen. So you're pretty much screwing yourself over. Its a bit of a Catch-22 but something has got to give, I'm afraid.
 
Dolby said:
Yea that's always got to me : Why do they need the replacement before breaking up with you?
Click to expand...

Because it allows them to forget about you immediately and move on. Because (and I'm just repeating what another girl told me) is that most of the time they do still love you, it's just not that love that would keep you together type thing (think they talking bull**** but yea, thats from the horses mouth)

You know when guys give you the advice of "The best way to get over a girl is to get under a new one as soon as possible" ?

Where do you think they took their advice from?.... exactly....

I've had 2 women in the past where I was the other guy, supporting them/making them laugh while their oblivious boyfriend didn't do **** to rectify the situation (or even help it by just changing small things in their behavior, which is a tough thing to do, especially if you're a momma's boy, 30, still living at home and have no job)

Come to think of it, wtf would someone fall for someone like that in the first place?

Oh wait... big dick ;)
 
hxc87x said:
its amazing what you're capable of when you're dead inside, when you really know that you have nothing left to lose. you just abandon all hope and allow yourself to be overwhelmed with hate and anger. you just let your inner psycho explode and nothing can hold you back.
david and goliath has nothing on what followed...
(yeah, i kicked the **** out of his 25yr old jock ass!)
Click to expand...
And with that probably got him laid and extinguished any chance you have of getting back with her.
ANY adivice would be greatly appreciated.
Click to expand...
Next time - don't be a dumbass. Just say hello, excuse yourself politely and get the **** away.
 
/me looks at Dolby and AcidRazor.

It might shock you 2 to hear this, but playing 'victim' to those devils disguised as women is starting to get a bit old. Yes so you got screwed over by women. Yes you were treated like **** and most likely lied to, but this continuous 'woe is me women are so poofy' attitude is pretty boring by now. Does it offend you that you were so easy to get over? Does it bruise your ego that you were so easily replacable? From your posts it seems to me like you think women are lower than amoebic parasites. Shock shock horror horror women get done over by men too, but i see very few women here painting all men with that tainted brush. It might boggle your minds to know that women are not specifically evil - they are just as human as men. This means that just like men they can mask certain emotions by behaving in certain ways (e.g. the OP masks his pining for his ex by sleeping with a bunch of random chicks and then beats the new bf up). You both just seem to assume that the moment a woman does anything that falls outside of what you deem morally acceptable they are the devil incarnate. Maybe they are just human? Maybe they make mistakes like everybody else? Maybe they just didnt love you that much? Maybe they felt isolated from you? There are a million possible answers that would justify many different behaviour options. But no. Women are evil and must be killed.

Good luck in your exceptionally healthy relationships with women - assuming that you can bare to tolerate one long enough for her to screw you over.

And Dolby? For someone who seems to hate all online people so much (IRCers, fb'ers, chatters, bloggers etc etc) you sure seem to spend alot of time online. *bows to the grandmaster*

Hypocrisy is so unattaractive.
 
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