My current mess :(

STS said:
there are people who WANT kids who are clearly not ready for kids either, i disagree with a lot of people on parenting and how they treat their kids myself. i'd rather take kids in than let them be aborted. i wasn't ready to be a father or prepared financially when i found out that my girlfriend was pregnant, but i wanted to make it work and today it's the best thing in my life
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But you wanted to make it work.

Too many people take on the responsibility of raising children when they can hardly look after themselves. I'm not saying no one should have children but I think people are way too sensitive about abortion. Either way, abortion is actually not the problem, unprotected sex is.
 
googoodoll said:
Well no one wanted a baby...

If more people would have abortions instead of worrying about the poor baby's soul there would be less abandoned, neglected, emo kids in our country.
Just end it right then and there and spare the kid a lifetime of suffering.
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This is easy to say if you have never found yourself in the situation of having an unplanned pregnancy. A close relative of mine very recently found out she was pregnant, she was determined NOT to go through with it, and even made an appointment at the clinic. One night I spoke to her and she couldn't stop crying about it. In the end, she decided to keep the baby, despite her circumstances.

I would never ever consider abortion, but do not judge people who go through with it. I guess I just don't agree with you, especially since I'm a mom too.
 
Ms_S said:
This is easy to say if you have never found yourself in the situation of having an unplanned pregnancy. A close relative of mine very recently found out she was pregnant, she was determined NOT to go through with it, and even made an appointment at the clinic. One night I spoke to her and she couldn't stop crying about it. In the end, she decided to keep the baby, despite her circumstances.

I would never ever consider abortion, but do not judge people who go through with it. I guess I just don't agree with you, especially since I'm a mom too.
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I agree abortion is not the easy way out but you still have to consider the child's future. If you know you can take care of a baby then sure, have as many as you like but people shouldn't go sulking when they get pregnant 'unexpectedly'.

I can't cross the road when a car is coming and then cry when it hits me...
 
killerbyte said:
When you have a kid that you don't get to see its like a part of you has been ripped out. The fact that I am still breathing still counts for something I suppose.
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When you've had a kid and then find out when its just over a year old that you're not the father it feels like a part of you has been ripped out, cooked, and eaten in front of you.

googoodoll said:
I agree abortion is not the easy way out but you still have to consider the child's future. If you know you can take care of a baby then sure, have as many as you like but people shouldn't go sulking when they get pregnant 'unexpectedly'.

I can't cross the road when a car is coming and then cry when it hits me...
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:wtf: You've still got a looooong way to go.
 
OGroteKoning said:
I can relate a little here. I see my baby only 2.5 days per week and it breaks my heart but at least I get to see my baby. Your situation is much worse. I feel for you...
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And that is criminal. In what world do we live in that a child should only get to see the other parent's 40% of the week. Thats the problem with the people in charge, they forget that the child suffers the most. BOTH parents are needed during childhood, a kid deserves to have both parents in equal parts. My problem is that I see how my parent's divorce went and how my mother allowed my dad to come round every night to tuck us in and I presumed that any mother who loves her kids would offer the same level of access that my mom did.
 
YingYang said:
When you've had a kid and then find out when its just over a year old that you're not the father it feels like a part of you has been ripped out, cooked, and eaten in front of you.
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Please tell me this did not happen to you!? Because if it did then words cannot express how much I feel for you. If my ex turned around today and told me that my daughter wasn't mine then I would die. I don't think I would make it out of my office's car park before just crying. At least we aren't in the US where you would still be expected to pay child support even for a child that is proven to be biologically not yours.

THen you get stories like this... my heart goes out to that kid, 18 years old and already been dealt a blow no man should ever have to suffer.
http://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1riz1t/fathers_son_given_up_for_adoption/
 
killerbyte said:
Please tell me this did not happen to you!? Because if it did then words cannot express how much I feel for you. If my ex turned around today and told me that my daughter wasn't mine then I would die. I don't think I would make it out of my office's car park before just crying. At least we aren't in the US where you would still be expected to pay child support even for a child that is proven to be biologically not yours.
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Yes it did...
 
Women... I've had girls feel me up the moment their boyfriend leaves the room... Had a girl "jokingly" ask if we could finish a quickie before her boyfriend (my friend) got back from the shops... had girls want to come to my place while their boyfriends are overseas.

On the other hand, guys also pull this **** as well. Got bleak with a mate of mine recently who was flirting left right and center with girls because he'd been drinking and his gf was out of town. Only when the rest of us commented on it did he stop, and also politely asked us not to tell his gf.

And people wonder why I'm single... people are just full of crap.

Anyway. OP, I hope things work out ok for you man.
 
YingYang said:
When you've had a kid and then find out when its just over a year old that you're not the father it feels like a part of you has been ripped out, cooked, and eaten in front of you.
/snip.
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Sad. But I am sure your feelings for the child did not change. Or did it?

killerbyte said:
And that is criminal. In what world do we live in that a child should only get to see the other parent's 40% of the week. Thats the problem with the people in charge, they forget that the child suffers the most. BOTH parents are needed during childhood, a kid deserves to have both parents in equal parts. My problem is that I see how my parent's divorce went and how my mother allowed my dad to come round every night to tuck us in and I presumed that any mother who loves her kids would offer the same level of access that my mom did.
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Why my circumstance is different to yours, is that I work in another province and can't travel every day. So for now we are "content" to carry on like this, but it must end early next year because I won't be able to cope with this situation. Either they must move to my work location or I must get another project to work on. But I need the cash...

Your parents had a great arrangement for you and your siblings. you don't get that often
 
OGroteKoning said:
Sad. But I am sure your feelings for the child did not change. Or did it?n
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I don't quite know hey.

Both my daughters were born after the last time I saw her and the mother. So perhaps being with my own kids drowned out the longing to see her.

For a while I kept a few pics of her on the family PC at home (hidden of course) and one day my wife came across them and called me to the room. She then told me she's going to delete the pics, because I need to let go and move on with my own kids.

What I didn't tell her is that I have 3 pics on my office PC. I have tried, but I can't seem to get to delete it.
 
YingYang said:
I don't quite know hey.

Both my daughters were born after the last time I saw her and the mother. So perhaps being with my own kids drowned out the longing to see her.

For a while I kept a few pics of her on the family PC at home (hidden of course) and one day my wife came across them and called me to the room. She then told me she's going to delete the pics, because I need to let go and move on with my own kids.

What I didn't tell her is that I have 3 pics on my office PC. I have tried, but I can't seem to get to delete it.
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:);)
 
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