Paying for Dates

Nick333

Nick333

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I had a first date on the weekend and I was fully prepared to pay. It was only coffee after all. What bugged me some what was that she didn't even offer to contribute. If she had I would have insisted, after all it was my invite, but surely in this day and age she should have offered?

Also, do modern women expect the guy to pay for all dates? If so I've got a problem because I don't think I should have to be paying someones way to enjoy their company.

I'll have to go back to drunken zipless ****s that occasionally turn in to something else. Actually, that might be best for a guy like me. :erm:
 
Don't know how to answer this one. Kept on writing and deleting again. Sowy.
 
Yeah would have been nice if she offered. If she is really hot, forget about it, and give her another chance.
 
#1) If you asked her out, then you pay.
#2) If she asked you out, then you pay.
#3) If she is just a friend, then you pay.
#4) If she offers to pay with any of the above, then she is most likely desperate and looking for another date.

If you want her to pay with any of the above, including #4, then she will also no longer be interested in you.
 
Paying on a date, or paying for dates? Your title is somewhat misleading :p

Anyway I can't say that I've been faced with the same problem - after 2.5 years of dating and 0.5 years of being engaged, we still argue over wanting to pick up the bill :D
 
catweasel said:
Yeah would have been nice if she offered. If she is really hot, forget about it, and give her another chance.
Click to expand...

Well no, but she seemed nice. What worries me is that there might be some sort of expectation.
 
Yea i've had similar "concerns" on a few dates i've been on.

I generally feel the first few dates, if it was initiated by me, i'll pay in full, no problem (i will always pay for the first day regardless) . However i do want the girl to at least show signs of at least splitting the bill by the 2nd date. Even if she simply reach for her wallet, or simply say "ok, next time i'll pay" , that tells me she's not taking things for granted.

I've met a few girls that won't say a word , even after like 6-7 dates i would still be paying and sorry, no way how i look at it, if the girl has a job, her own place and don't offer to share the bill at some stage, then it's not leaving a good impression.
 
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Mike Hoxbig said:
Paying on a date, or paying for dates? Your title is somewhat misleading :p

Anyway I can't say that I've been faced with the same problem - after 2.5 years of dating and 0.5 years of being engaged, we still argue over wanting to pick up the bill :D
Click to expand...

Lol, well the last gf sort of insisted on paying to begin with. It took her a while to even consider letting me pay an entire bill. I was like "just let me pay a ****ing bill, I'm not your man whore". :D God bless older women.
 
When you see the waiter bringing the bill, excuse yourself and go to the bathroom, wait a while. Come back, open the bill, if she hasn't payed already, then its on you.

Honestly, it doesn't matter, I'd pretend I left my wallet in the car. If she wants to see you again, you'l know she likes you.
 
Mike Hoxbig said:
Anyway I can't say that I've been faced with the same problem - after 2.5 years of dating and 0.5 years of being engaged, we still argue over wanting to pick up the bill :D
Click to expand...

Not to worry. You'll be married soon...then it's all one big blur...Mr. Hunter-Gatherer. ;)

As for paying for dates: I will admit, I have less dating experience than the majority.

I am an old-school guy, so I love the chivalry idea, BUT it is 2011, equality reigns supreme and it grates me no end if no offer is made.

Fair's fair.

I always offer, no matter where the invite comes from and what social event it is.

I am also earning >extremely< badly due to a variety of issues. If I'm on a date, it's because I would like to enjoy the company of someone else - not make them my dependant.
 
cbrunsdonza said:
#1) If you asked her out, then you pay.
#2) If she asked you out, then you pay.
#3) If she is just a friend, then you pay.
#4) If she offers to pay with any of the above, then she is most likely desperate and looking for another date.

If you want her to pay with any of the above, including #4, then she will also no longer be interested in you.
Click to expand...

No way, if she is really "just a friend" then she'll pay her share, like any friend will do.
 
diabolus said:
Yea i've had similar "concerns" on a few dates i've been on.

I generally feel the first few dates, if it was initiated by me, i'll pay in full, no problem (i will always pay for the first day regardless) . However i do want the girl to at least show signs of at least splitting the bill by the 2nd date. Even if she simply reach for her wallet, or simply say "ok, next time i'll pay" , that tells me she's not taking things for granted.

I've met a few girls that won't say a word , even after like 6-7 dates i would still be paying and sorry, no way how i look at it, if the girl has a job, her own place and don't offer to share the bill at some stage, then it's not leaving a good impression.
Click to expand...

Ja, and even if I do make mre than her, its just coffee she could at least offer.
 
Mikroz said:
Not to worry. You'll be married soon...then it's all one big blur...Mr. Hunter-Gatherer. ;)

As for paying for dates: I will admit, I have less dating experience than the majority.

I am an old-school guy, so I love the chivalry idea, BUT it is 2011, equality reigns supreme and it grates me no end if no offer is made.

Fair's fair.

I always offer, no matter where the invite comes from and what social event it is.

I am also earning >extremely< badly due to a variety of issues. If I'm on a date, it's because I would like to enjoy the company of someone else - not make them my dependant.
Click to expand...

Ja, its not like there's a disparity in earning potential these days.
 
I should say that I'm particularly upset about it, I'm more sort of deciding if I should be.
 
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