Platonic Relationships

Lust and friendship and the lonely frustrated male

:p
Nick333 said:
I hate agreeing with you but, this.

Unless both parties are hounds.

Relationship attraction (or love) is just friendship + sexual attraction. Once you have the friendship, at least one person (unless they are both hounds) is very likely to have the sexual attraction. Usually the dude because we find any female not completely repulsive, sexually attractive. Ugly girls tend to be like guys in this respect.
Click to expand...

Yes, but a one-way sexual attraction (which is let's call it: the default - coming from males) does not mean that a platonic friendship is not possible, it simply means that the female has a choice to ignore the attraction and set boundaries or to walk away and not have to cope with that sexual attraction of the male friend. So also for the male, he can make a decision as to whether enjoy a friendship or none at all.

I've had to cope with a few males in my life, men make great friends, but from my experience the older generation of males are still as randy and sex verskrik as the days of nipple caps and church twice a day, whereas the younger generation of males are less verskrik about porn and sex since they were born with it freely available, on tv and online, the over-reaction or compensation behaviour is much less or even missing in comparison with the the older generation and the younger generation of men today enjoy more natural relationships with the females in their society (where sex is no longer suppressed and where sexism is not as prevalent as it was with the older generation of males).

The concept of being a gentlemen or a civil male means that you have control over your lust, you animal :p
 
There's some stats on it somewhere: a study done at some varsity: Basically a lot of women think it can work, and most guys agree that it can't.
 
wrathex said:
:p

Yes, but a one-way sexual attraction (which is let's call it: the default - coming from males) does not mean that a platonic friendship is not possible, it simply means that the female has a choice to ignore the attraction and set boundaries or to walk away and not have to cope with that sexual attraction of the male friend. So also for the male, he can make a decision as to whether enjoy a friendship or none at all.

I've had to cope with a few males in my life, men make great friends, but from my experience the older generation of males are still as randy and sex verskrik as the days of nipple caps and church twice a day, whereas the younger generation of males are less verskrik about porn and sex since they were born with it freely available, on tv and online, the over-reaction or compensation behaviour is much less or even missing in comparison with the the older generation and the younger generation of men today enjoy more natural relationships with the females in their society (where sex is no longer suppressed and where sexism is not as prevalent as it was with the older generation of males).

The concept of being a gentlemen or a civil male means that you have control over your lust, you animal :p
Click to expand...

Are you saying I'm part of the "older" generation. To the women I like I'm the younger generation. :p I'm a total gentleman. I've never pressured anyone for sex. The feeling I get is that a lot of 45 plus guys are very sexually aggressive (and bad at sex to boot). Personally, I've never been in the friend zone. I put my intentions out there and if I'm still friends with you it's because you can put up with my flirting. I've had a few chicks in the friends zone and I always feel a little bad about it because it feels as though you're leading them on or something.

Speaking of the younger generation: as useless and directionless as the seem to me, I recently met two friends (girl and guy) and I assumed the dude was totally in the friend zone. I was like you total wuss you must be hung up on this chick and here I am spading her in front of you. When I got her to myself a few days later she was pouting because he had ignored her in bed the other night. Eish kids! WTF? They do give me hope for the future sometimes. :D
 
No, not possible.

Maybe if they were a real minger...

Minger:

Someone who was not just touched by the ugly stick at birth but was battered severely with it. Anyone who does not look better to you after several strong alcoholic drinks probably fits this category. Anyone scoring 7+ on www.amiaminger.com
 
it's easy to be in a platonic relationship if your sexual needs are satisfied. and if you think the majority of humans are clingy, pathetic idiots that you would never dream of getting involved with
 
Pooky said:
But surely then you can only be friends with super ugly girls?
Click to expand...

Well, you can only be just be friends with super ugly girls. You can be the pathetic friend zone friends with attractive girls.
 
Pooky said:
Is it possible to have a completely platonic relationship between a (straight) male and (straight) female?

That's it.
Click to expand...

Friendzoned_278d25_3156902.jpg

http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/857/friendzoned278d25315690.jpg/
 
Last edited:
I'm always amazed at how people like to place restrictions on themselves, saying you can't do this and you can't do that.
We are not enslaved by our desires and attractions. Yes, of course it's possible to be in a platonic relationship, even if you are both attracted to each other, even if you enjoy flirting with each other - you are not a mindless beast that has no choice or control over your life. You can choose to be friends. You can love and choose not to be sexual. Anyone who thinks differently is placing self-imposed limitations on themselves and their lives and is poorer for it.
 
I'm with abzo. If she's fugly, yes, if she's a looker, no.
Click to expand...

Agreed. I spent time with plenty of girls who I would have a go at the moment I found out they were single. I would only stay away if I am friends with their boyfriends, in which case bro code applies.

it's easy to be in a platonic relationship if your sexual needs are satisfied
Click to expand...

Truth. I have given up porn and am considering setting up a FWB deal with a single girl who is average looking at best, but I know who is into me. She asked me out once when I was into porn and I didn't push things with her, so we went back to being friends. No porn = randy = suddenly standards are more flexible.

Yes, but a one-way sexual attraction (which is let's call it: the default - coming from males) does not mean that a platonic friendship is not possible, it simply means that the female has a choice to ignore the attraction and set boundaries or to walk away and not have to cope with that sexual attraction of the male friend. So also for the male, he can make a decision as to whether enjoy a friendship or none at all.
Click to expand...

Girls who are actually aware that a guy is into her and keep him around I find a little off putting. Either put the guy out of his misery and then try being friends, or just don't spend time with the guy.

My sister has friends who have recommended she keep a few guys like this around to stroke her ego, even if she doesn't like them. It's actually quite disgusting. The only time I ever spend time with a girl who is into me, but I don't feel the same way for, is at group gatherings. It seems some women are quite happy to string along dudes who have feelings for them just so they can feel better about themselves.
 
yes, it's possible, over the years I've had some really good platonic relationships, I would say though that it has become easier with age and a huge degree of self awareness around personal and relationship motivations
 
joelus said:
I'm always amazed at how people like to place restrictions on themselves, saying you can't do this and you can't do that.
We are not enslaved by our desires and attractions. Yes, of course it's possible to be in a platonic relationship, even if you are both attracted to each other, even if you enjoy flirting with each other - you are not a mindless beast that has no choice or control over your life. You can choose to be friends. You can love and choose not to be sexual. Anyone who thinks differently is placing self-imposed limitations on themselves and their lives and is poorer for it.
Click to expand...

Get over yourself, fruit cake!
 
Pooky said:
Is it possible to have a completely platonic relationship between a (straight) male and (straight) female?
Click to expand...

of course it is!

my best "man" at my wedding was a woman. a really, really close friend. sure, i realise she is a woman, and she is attractive, but i am perfectly happy being "only" friends with her. the occasional physical desire for her that i experience is hardly going to make me jump her!

she is also married, and very happily so. she has no desire to jump me either (and i'm not dog-ugly or anything).

our interactions are platonic, and being mature adults, whenever the slightest bit of attraction makes itself felt, we deal with it by not allowing it to influence how we treat each other.

one of my most treasured relationships :)
 
abzo said:
Because women use us for our minds. :mad:
Click to expand...

My very good friend and former husband and father of my children once uttered "you want my soul" "and you can't have it" during an intense emotional moment of difference between us.

We had this little refrain we would sing randomly to each other: "stop varking round in my head" it went on for a year or more.

Looks, education or station in life has got nothing to do with the possibility of a friendship, though individuals choose to make it so, probably because time and opportunity is limited.

So more superficial filters are used for quick results, thus filtering out all the little gems in the haystack along with it.

-----------
Nick333 No, I didn't mean you personally.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top
Sign up to the MyBroadband newsletter
X