Possible alarm bells

[genetic]

Lets say your girlfriend has another male friend - a guy she knows at work. They're friends, that's it... but she tells you that he has a crush on her, and has attempted to make a move on her before. She's being honest with you which I guess is a good sign and she says she pushes all his advances away.

Now she says that he wants to go out for a few drinks with her sometime and she asks you if it's OK. Obviously you'd say no, because if he's made advances before - he'll do it again. Add alcohol to the mix then you have a recipe for disaster. Worst thing is, you, her boyfriend, isn't invited. She accepts your answer of no, and says she won't see him after hours at all, and she says she can understand why you'd feel strongly against it.

But, let's say that sometimes she's difficult to get hold of on weekends, which under the circumstances makes you very suspicious.

Do you think that the alarm bells are ringing? Time to pull out?

 

[pezulu]

Don't you trust her?

 

[Tiscanny]

Install a tracking device on her car and do some PI work yourself! or just ask her plainly and accept her answer, she has been honest with you so far?

 

[bwana]

She's told you about the situation, understands your concerns, and has agreed not to see him outside of the work environment. From what I've read the only indication of her infidelity lies in your overactive imagination.

 

[D3x!]

Your problem is allowing her out the kitchen.

I find it kind of weird that she spoke to you about him asking her out for drinks, IMO you to need to talk or break it off.

 

[lucifir]

Your problem is allowing her out the kitchen.

this ^

 

[noxibox]

Does she have a history of cheating? If not what's to worry about?

 

[Voicy]

Time to start treating her better*, don't become the monkey branch.

* By no means am I saying you're mistreating her, but treat her EVEN better so that her eyes are set on you alone.

 

[Dolby]

Lets say your girlfriend has another male friend - a guy she knows at work. They're friends, that's it... but she tells you that he has a crush on her, and has attempted to make a move on her before. She's being honest with you which I guess is a good sign and she says she pushes all his advances away

If she's a smart girl, she'll tell you knowing you'll think 'well, she told me ... to put your mind at ease.

I had the same situation - she met this guy who was flirty (at NA though) and told me about him. Told me she'd spoken to her sponsor about the situation ... and when an SMS arrived on weekends, she'd say things like 'I've taken this up - what's his issue?' etc etc

Obviously all BS in my case though

 

[wrathex]

Lets say your girlfriend has another male friend - a guy she knows at work. They're friends, that's it... but she tells you that he has a crush on her, and has attempted to make a move on her before. She's being honest with you which I guess is a good sign and she says she pushes all his advances away.

Now she says that he wants to go out for a few drinks with her sometime and she asks you if it's OK. Obviously you'd say no, because if he's made advances before - he'll do it again. Add alcohol to the mix then you have a recipe for disaster. Worst thing is, you, her boyfriend, isn't invited. She accepts your answer of no, and says she won't see him after hours at all, and she says she can understand why you'd feel strongly against it.

But, let's say that sometimes she's difficult to get hold of on weekends, which under the circumstances makes you very suspicious.

Do you think that the alarm bells are ringing? Time to pull out?

Your nemesis seems to know what he is doing, he is trying to separate this sheep from the flock, then he will give her some drink, to lower her inhibitions, then oooops, "it was a mistake and I didn't mean to do it - must be the drinks!" "please forgive me, I said yes to a drink with the devil - he made me do it !"

Trust nobody- ever - then you'll be just fine

 

[MickeyD]

@genetic: kneecap the S.O.B. -> real men don't make them sneaky moves.

 

[Dolby]

@genetic: kneecap the S.O.B. -> real men don't make them sneaky moves.

... takes two to tango though :/

While agree with your statement, she should accept

 

[MickeyD]

... takes two to tango though :/

While agree with your statement, she should accept

Yep, her acceptance of the "date" will also get her a kick in the panty.

 

[CamiKaze]

Your gf is difficult to get hold of over weekends...hmmm. I suggest you see what she is up to next weekend, you have to be sneaky on this one. Confronting them first would not be a good idea, it would only make you seem more paranoid. Rather hide the paranoia by being sneaky. lol.

Do you have a backup gf?

 

[FrankCastle]

Now she says that he wants to go out for a few drinks with her sometime and she asks you if it's OK.

The fact that she even considered it proves she's starting to give in to his advances and will most likely succumb.Unless its work related where a few other colleagues are present its a no otherwise break it off.
This guy will sense victory at will stop at nothing to go in for the kill.
What could he possibly want to discuss with her over few a few drinks that can't be said at work?

 

[Thugscub]

Keep at least a dozen girlfreinds so if one scooters off their are plenty still to go.

 

[RanzB]

Lets say your girlfriend has another male friend - a guy she knows at work. They're friends, that's it... but she tells you that he has a crush on her, and has attempted to make a move on her before. She's being honest with you which I guess is a good sign and she says she pushes all his advances away.

Now she says that he wants to go out for a few drinks with her sometime and she asks you if it's OK. Obviously you'd say no, because if he's made advances before - he'll do it again. Add alcohol to the mix then you have a recipe for disaster. Worst thing is, you, her boyfriend, isn't invited. She accepts your answer of no, and says she won't see him after hours at all, and she says she can understand why you'd feel strongly against it.

But, let's say that sometimes she's difficult to get hold of on weekends, which under the circumstances makes you very suspicious.

Do you think that the alarm bells are ringing? Time to pull out?

Sorry, but even if she isn't cheating, or considering it, the fact that both of you know that this guy is after her and she still considers going out with him for drinks means she doesn't have any respect for you.

 

[Kornhub]

Sorry, but even if she isn't cheating, or considering it, the fact that both of you know that this guy is after her and she still considers going out with him for drinks means she doesn't have any respect for you.

I had an ex who had a friend that had a 'crush' on her. Did not bother me when she went out with him or other guys,I trusted her. Relationships differ I guess.

 

[RanzB]

I had an ex who had a friend that had a 'crush' on her. Did not bother me when she went out with him or other guys,I trusted her. Relationships differ I guess.

Did he make a move on her while you two were dating?

 

[killadoob]

Sorry, but even if she isn't cheating, or considering it, the fact that both of you know that this guy is after her and she still considers going out with him for drinks means she doesn't have any respect for you.

Yup, that is shocking that she wants to go for drinks with him. Dump her ass and move along or stop worrying and trust her but you would have to be superman to trust this situation.