Possible alarm bells

[I.am.Sam]

//sigh

She should not have to ask him.
She needs to decide the wisdom of going or not going for herself. Obviously she'll probably mention to him if she's going / not going.

From those choices that she makes & his personality he needs to decide if he's gonna stay with her.

by her asking him and not asking him is like the same thing cause the guy she is going with has feelings for her

he will throw the book at her for her to fall for him ...and maybe he is a guy who loves the chase of taken woman ....it becomes worse

and yes she should know the difference between leading someone on and moving away from it

 

[The_Ogre]

//sigh

She should not have to ask him.
She needs to decide the wisdom of going or not going for herself. Obviously she'll probably mention to him if she's going / not going.

From those choices that she makes & his personality he needs to decide if he's gonna stay with her.

I think she asked him just to bring it to his attention, she didn't really care what he answered. Then one day when he catches them holding hands exiting a bar she'll tell him she already told him about this friend/colleague.

I say he should kick her to the curb! The fact that he had to come ask MyBB shows that its bothering him

 

[ChilliGirl]

by her asking him and not asking him is like the same thing cause the guy she is going with has feelings for her

he will throw the book at her for her to fall for him ...and maybe he is a guy who loves the chase of taken woman ....it becomes worse

and yes she should know the difference between leading someone on and moving away from it

it's her problem .. she should not make it the OP's. She shoulda sent the other guy hiking the moment she found out he liked her. UNLESS she liked him too in which case she shoulda told the OP "sorry...... "

In my experience you can't remain friends with people that like you in a manner that is more than friends unless you wish to take the relationship further. It's not fair on the 3rd party, your partner or you.

 

[I.am.Sam]

it's her problem .. she should not make it the OP's. She shoulda sent the other guy hiking the moment she found out he liked her. UNLESS she liked him too in which case she shoulda told the OP "sorry...... "

In my experience you can't remain friends with people that like you in a manner that is more than friends unless you wish to take the relationship further. It's not fair on the 3rd party, your partner or you.

exactly this ....so OP should not be even thinking an tell her straight look either you go with this guy out for drinks and i leave or you tell him you have a bf and cannot go for drinks no matter what

theres nothing wrong in that and theres no jealousy in that ....you can trust you SO no matter what ...but you can never trust someone else

 

[ChilliGirl]

exactly this ....so OP should not be even thinking an tell her straight look either you go with this guy out for drinks and i leave or you tell him you have a bf and cannot go for drinks no matter what

theres nothing wrong in that and theres no jealousy in that ....you can trust you SO no matter what ...but you can never trust someone else

& then when the guy gives her drugs she can blame him(BF) if he said yes??? she has to chose & realise there are risks.

 

[I.am.Sam]

& then when the guy gives her drugs she can blame him(BF) if he said yes??? she has to chose & realise there are risks.

thats the other thing when she cheats and say yes but you allowed me ..you know he liked me and you know i get out of control with one two drinks

OP the ball is in your court

 

[MR V]

it's her problem .. she should not make it the OP's. She shoulda sent the other guy hiking the moment she found out he liked her. UNLESS she liked him too in which case she shoulda told the OP "sorry...... "

In my experience you can't remain friends with people that like you in a manner that is more than friends unless you wish to take the relationship further. It's not fair on the 3rd party, your partner or you.

it's very fishy you rather pull out whilst you still ahead

 

[Nick333]

exactly this ....so OP should not be even thinking an tell her straight look either you go with this guy out for drinks and i leave or you tell him you have a bf and cannot go for drinks no matter what

theres nothing wrong in that and theres no jealousy in that ....you can trust you SO no matter what ...but you can never trust someone else

Because the SO might be too weak and stupid to make her own decision?

The point here, I think, is that her trying to get him to make her decision for her should be warning enough.

 

[ChilliGirl]

it's very fishy you rather pull out whilst you still ahead

I didn't say I would go with the person or that she should. I'm saying the OP should not accept the responsibilities of making the choices regarding who she's friends with. She shoulda known for herself that it is not a good idea...

 

[ChilliGirl]

Because the SO might be too weak and stupid to make her own decision?

The point here, I think, is that her trying to get him to make her decision for her should be warning enough.

Yippeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

see I'm not the onlyone that thinks that way

 

[Chaos247]

How long has the OP been with her?

 

[I.am.Sam]

Because the SO might be too weak and stupid to make her own decision?

The point here, I think, is that her trying to get him to make her decision for her should be warning enough.

Yippeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

see I'm not the onlyone that thinks that way

exactly .....some woman out there

/sigh

but i dont complain i like those woman ...

 

[noxibox]

In my experience you can't remain friends with people that like you in a manner that is more than friends unless you wish to take the relationship further. It's not fair on the 3rd party, your partner or you.

Unless he is unaware she has a boyfriend there is nothing unfair about it.

 

[Fuma]

She already slept with the guy. She's asking him if she could sleep with him one more time before she decides who she wants.

 

[Brawler]

Sorry, but even if she isn't cheating, or considering it, the fact that both of you know that this guy is after her and she still considers going out with him for drinks means she doesn't have any respect for you.

+1.

 

[Nick333]

Yippeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

see I'm not the onlyone that thinks that way

Not the only one who believes maturity, responsibillity, rust and respect should be the basis for relationships? I'm sure there are others.

 

[I.am.Sam]

Not the only one who believes maturity, responsibillity, rust and respect should be the basis for relationships? I'm sure there are others.

there is lots ...just some who need it in they face to see it lol

 

[Nick333]

exactly .....some woman out there

/sigh

but i dont complain i like those woman ...

I don't so much any more. I have some sympathy for people stuck in bad relationships and I don't really have a massive problem with once of slips when it comes to fidelity. But honestly, if you're not happy in a relationship grow a pair and get out. There are very few good excuses for not getting out of a relationship that's not working for you.

 

[I.am.Sam]

I don't so much any more. I have some sympathy for people stuck in bad relationships and I don't really have a massive problem with once of slips when it comes to fidelity. But honestly, if you're not happy in a relationship grow a pair and get out. There are very few good excuses for not getting out of a relationship that's not working for you.

hehe somehow the chase used to be nice ....well now dont think i will run after a lady in a relationship ...tried it like a month ago but got bored quick ...