Yeah, I have similar things. I don't have abandonment issues, but I never think I'm good enough. I never think I'm good enough at my job, or for other people, particularly women I want to date.
It sounds like you should look for a new job anyway. I mean, even if you are particularly sensitive to it, it isn't good if a senior manager doesn't want you around. Even if you were completely "healthy", it isn't good. Any normal person wouldn't take that well.
There is no easy answer. I wish there was a magic wand.
I will say that you should read up on neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity refers to the growth of an adult brain. I've seen one or two studies that indicate that depression is actually what you feel when the rate at which neurons are born is less than the rate at which neurons are destroyed. When you create more neurons than you lose, you feel good. This is a theory I've read about, backed up by some evidence.
What is generally regarded as true is that neuroplasticity is good for mental health. When your brain is changing, you feel good.
So how can one achieve neuroplasticity in general?
A few ways are:
Eating healthily - I think especially the right fats are important here. The usual suspects like eggs and fish appear.
Exercise. A combination of weight lifting and just walking I believe promotes neuroplasticity.
Meditation. Has been shown to have permanent long term positive effects on the brain, but the effects take a while. You would have to meditate for a long time to see results - but at least the results are permanent.
Yoga. Similar to the above.
Psychedelic drugs such as magic mushrooms. These apparently can do wonders. Just beware that there are no magic bullets, and even though magic mushrooms are powerful, they are not magic bullets.
It sounds like you should look for a new job anyway. I mean, even if you are particularly sensitive to it, it isn't good if a senior manager doesn't want you around. Even if you were completely "healthy", it isn't good. Any normal person wouldn't take that well.
There is no easy answer. I wish there was a magic wand.
I will say that you should read up on neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity refers to the growth of an adult brain. I've seen one or two studies that indicate that depression is actually what you feel when the rate at which neurons are born is less than the rate at which neurons are destroyed. When you create more neurons than you lose, you feel good. This is a theory I've read about, backed up by some evidence.
What is generally regarded as true is that neuroplasticity is good for mental health. When your brain is changing, you feel good.
So how can one achieve neuroplasticity in general?
A few ways are:
Eating healthily - I think especially the right fats are important here. The usual suspects like eggs and fish appear.
Exercise. A combination of weight lifting and just walking I believe promotes neuroplasticity.
Meditation. Has been shown to have permanent long term positive effects on the brain, but the effects take a while. You would have to meditate for a long time to see results - but at least the results are permanent.
Yoga. Similar to the above.
Psychedelic drugs such as magic mushrooms. These apparently can do wonders. Just beware that there are no magic bullets, and even though magic mushrooms are powerful, they are not magic bullets.
