Sex Addict

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Nicci said:
Get a teddy bear whilst having sex and choke the crap out of it -will that not help?
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What if his eyes roll back and mistakes her for the teddy? Men do strange things when they approach the point of no return...

:D

samr1wp said:
hahahaha bastid one day i will get you back so bad lol

na i want learn more about the symptoms :p
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:)

ShaunSA said:
Sam doesn't masturbate. He is "saving himself" :D
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Hopefully he's not recycled...
 
smalltownsky said:
well i'm not a violent person, and she said it was okay. we spoke a lot about our pasts and growing up and i thought she understood that side to me and she was the one that volunteered to try my fetish, but i always felt kind of guilty doing it so didn't do it as much and spent more time on porn. she mentioned that she was always unsure about our future because of it and could see it's affected me deeply.

thing is it is bad, i can't talk about it really, i always have to hide it, i'm always paranoid about my family finding out that i was a little sociopath, i can never really do the things i want to do as they are really dark, so it's like a guilty pleasure which i'll never be able to do. it isn't healthy for me, but there isn't much else to me really.

the scary part is that i deal with it and it does go, but then that is a big chunk of my life gone, that is a big part of my identity gone, i don't know what will take its place
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Bud leave the past behind you and focus on the future.All this freak on stuff is not helping now and it never will.It will just become worse.You've got a little kid now so focus on being the best dad you can be.
Seek some councelling,because the fact that you can post here shows that there is help for you.
 
Who is anybody to judge anybody on what is 'healthy' in their sex life? As long as whatever is going down (literally? :/) is between consenting adults, the rest be damned.

And smalltownsky, just because your wife wasn't into the same thing doesn't necessarily mean what you're somehow bad. It was almost 2yrs before my SO and I finally realised that we share a similar quirk in the bedroom. Neither of us said anything because so many would think its a bit off, but actually our sex life is way more exciting than it ever was. I haven't read your story or what happened in your past as a kid, so of I'm completely off mark here, ignore me.

But yeah, every pot has a lid. You just need to find a like minded sexual partner. And they do exists ;) No matter how strange the thing is that gets you going ;)
 
I agree with DrYes
Rather never do something than try it once if its seriously wrong...
If its just very weird (like peeing on someone or something like that) then get someone that will do it with you.

But the very fact that you've posted here says you think you either require help, or want other people to justify your urge.
If its the first of these, then you're more than half way there.

If your tongue causes you to stumble, cut it off. I'd almost advise to give up your internet for a while as that's what seems to be feeding your desires.
 
samr1wp said:
tiger is that you :p
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Hahahaha :D

smalltownsky said:
well i'm not a violent person, and she said it was okay. we spoke a lot about our pasts and growing up and i thought she understood that side to me and she was the one that volunteered to try my fetish, but i always felt kind of guilty doing it so didn't do it as much and spent more time on porn. she mentioned that she was always unsure about our future because of it and could see it's affected me deeply.

thing is it is bad, i can't talk about it really, i always have to hide it, i'm always paranoid about my family finding out that i was a little sociopath, i can never really do the things i want to do as they are really dark, so it's like a guilty pleasure which i'll never be able to do. it isn't healthy for me, but there isn't much else to me really.

the scary part is that i deal with it and it does go, but then that is a big chunk of my life gone, that is a big part of my identity gone, i don't know what will take its place
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Fsck that. Live your life the way that makes you happy. Just be willing to bear the consequences of your choices and actions.
 
It is unfortunate to see your situation. I as well had trouble to enjoy my fetish with my past partners but thankfully my SO has fetishes and we thoroughly enjoy each others fetishes. There was a time I felt hopeless and that I won't be able to find someone who can enjoy something different to the same old same old and I know how frustrating it is if your partner is not comfortable with it because it is apart of who you are. So what I'm saying it that you will find someone who you can enjoy your fetish with. Seeing as you like porn so much, try online chat sites, Omegle is a good place, just don't be a creeper.
 
If you really want to stop you would stop.

Most addicts usually when they see rock bottom if the wife is leaving how much lower do you want to go.
 
buyeye said:
If you really want to stop you would stop.

Most addicts usually when they see rock bottom if the wife is leaving how much lower do you want to go.
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i may sound like a wussy, but it isn't that easy for me :) but i'm going to try

ChocolateBadger said:
It is unfortunate to see your situation. I as well had trouble to enjoy my fetish with my past partners but thankfully my SO has fetishes and we thoroughly enjoy each others fetishes. There was a time I felt hopeless and that I won't be able to find someone who can enjoy something different to the same old same old and I know how frustrating it is if your partner is not comfortable with it because it is apart of who you are. So what I'm saying it that you will find someone who you can enjoy your fetish with. Seeing as you like porn so much, try online chat sites, Omegle is a good place, just don't be a creeper.
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i try to not be a creep, that also makes connecting with people who share the same interests hard as a lot of them are creeps and only want one thing. i don't think i'd ever be able to connect with another person like i did with my wife, because of the emotion i put into it and the risk. so here's probably to a life of hookers and masturbation :p

Re83L said:
But the very fact that you've posted here says you think you either require help, or want other people to justify your urge.
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i feel i need help, it's nice that people justify it as i used to justify it too, and people should do whatever makes them happy. i'm pro-sex and sexuality, i just haven't been a very decent person myself.

Tojo's racoon henchman said:
OP lost his wife to the new age illuminati/lizard people/star child freak!? :eek:
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yep. one of the problems.

DrYes said:
Bud leave the past behind you and focus on the future.All this freak on stuff is not helping now and it never will.It will just become worse.You've got a little kid now so focus on being the best dad you can be.
Seek some councelling,because the fact that you can post here shows that there is help for you.
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I want to be the best dad i can be, and i think i'll avoid councilling and try it myself and see how it goes, but it seems like an extremely difficult task at the moment because while i'm fine now, it will creep back again later and seem appealing
 
Your getting divorced!? Since when?

Anyway is your fetish really that bad? we live in a society where anything slightly kinky is regarded as terrible and a sin.. if it's something like you want to stab your partner while fsckin, i can understand why you would want to stop, but if it's just usual ol BDSM i don't see the problem. try find someone with the same kinks as you or at least someone who is sexually open. If there are two consenting adults who want to explore a fetish then i'm all for it.
Care to describe some of your fetishes?
 
I want to be the best dad i can be, and i think i'll avoid councilling and try it myself and see how it goes, but it seems like an extremely difficult task at the moment because while i'm fine now, it will creep back again later and seem appealing
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Have you ever been to councilling? Its really not that big of a deal, there's a certain stigma that is attached to councilling. Find a shrink, preferably male and just tell him. He can help you out with how to handle your urges. I specified male so he can see eye to eye where a female might look down on you or feel uncomfortable. Maybe you and your wife should see a sexologist, help you and your wife to come to a common agreement in the bed room. Really you have nothing to lose.

Its just how south africa is, most people here are very taboo when I come to fetishes. If you really feeling the urge to be free, move to a European country, those girls will do anything. lol
 
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Helghast said:
Your getting divorced!? Since when?

Anyway is your fetish really that bad? we live in a society where anything slightly kinky is regarded as terrible and a sin.. if it's something like you want to stab your partner while fsckin, i can understand why you would want to stop, but if it's just usual ol BDSM i don't see the problem. try find someone with the same kinks as you or at least someone who is sexually open. If there are two consenting adults who want to explore a fetish then i'm all for it.
Care to describe some of your fetishes?
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since last week.
it's not so bad, but i do tend to feel a bit of shame and guilt with it as it is kind of dark stuff and there isn't really a rational reason behind it.
no :p

ChocolateBadger said:
Have you ever been to councilling? Its really not that big of a deal, there's a certain stigma that is attached to councilling. Find a shrink, preferably male and just tell him. He can help you out with how to handle your urges. I specified male so he can see eye to eye where a female might look down on you or feel uncomfortable. Maybe you and your wife should see a sexologist, help you and your find to come to a common agreement in the bed room. Really you have nothing to lose.
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i wouldn't be able to afford it, i found a decent one but i need to put money aside for it then, and i sometimes wonder what would be the use just talking about it. i appreciate that, i love my wife but even if i fix this one thing, there will be other things i'll need to fix and address. i just realised that this is a destructive part of me and has/will ruin any relationships i have with anyone
 
I'm also intrigued as to what it can be ... and how bad it actually is.

Does it involve objects?
 
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