Shy/nervousness

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_Hecate_

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I had to present my findings to one of our clients today. Normally its over the phone, this time it was in person. I am a ferocious blusher! and hates it!!!

What makes it worse is the client might think i'm lying if asked a question and then I blush.

What do you guys do to be less nervous/shy in similar circumstances? And dont tell me "picture them naked" who does that? and why would it work...I would just blush more thinking of them all naked and...stuff.

I just tried to remind myself to breath and talk slower as I normally start talking very fast.
 
Yeh picturing them naked makes things worse due to an erection.

You need to find out why you're shy and address it.
 
Picture them as a bunch of tree stumps. Srsly. Don't look at each individual person, view the room as a whole, it feels emptier that way.

Also, you need to understand that you own the room for that period of time, whether they're clients or not. They're paying attention to what you say, so speak as slowly as you want. They're not in a hurry to go anywhere.
 
It gets better with experience. You mentioned it was your first time. I think all will admit that your first time at anything is stressful... but you always get better at it. Practice makes perfect.
 
Wikkels88 said:
Have a few drinks before meeting your client, although this could get you fired:D
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Alcohol makes me more reserved and even more careful of what I say. No help there.

abzo said:
Yeh picturing them naked makes things worse due to an erection.

You need to find out why you're shy and address it.
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Wont have the erection problem. :p

I think its just practise. I have improved but the blushing is out of my control.
 
ClintZA said:
It gets better with experience. You mentioned it was your first time. I think all will admit that your first time at anything is stressful... but you always get better at it. Practice makes perfect.
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This.

I was the same. My job entails dealing with and meeting new people daily, face to face. I was and still am a shy introvert, but it is a hell of a lot easier talking to people than it was in the beginning because I do it so often.

Funnily enough it hasn't made an iota of difference with chatting up women outside work. If I meet an attractive woman in a formal business meeting I am all good. But if I want to chat up a woman at the shops/pub/bar then I'm all :o.
 
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_Hecate_ said:
I had to present my findings to one of our clients today. Normally its over the phone, this time it was in person. I am a ferocious blusher! and hates it!!!

What makes it worse is the client might think i'm lying if asked a question and then I blush.

What do you guys do to be less nervous/shy in similar circumstances? And dont tell me "picture them naked" who does that? and why would it work...I would just blush more thinking of them all naked and...stuff.

I just tried to remind myself to breath and talk slower as I normally start talking very fast.
Click to expand...

I may sound harsh and please know it's not intended to be an insult.

You think people care, yet they don't. Once you've bridged that divide in life you will realize that you never have to be shy or nervous, since no one gives a crap about you or anyone else.

:)
 
Yes, this is something that you will just get better at. I don't think there is any one quick fix.

Strangely, I would much prefer to speak to clients face to face than use the phone - I get nervous on the phone :)
 
teraside said:
I may sound harsh and please know it's not intended to be an insult.

You think people care, yet they don't. Once you've bridged that divide in life you will realize that you never have to be shy or nervous, since no one gives a crap about you or anyone else.
:)
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People been letting you down lately:)
 
teraside said:
I may sound harsh and please know it's not intended to be an insult.

You think people care, yet they don't. Once you've bridged that divide in life you will realize that you never have to be shy or nervous, since no one gives a crap about you or anyone else.

:)
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I think that's not as harsh as it may sound, but it is the truth. Nobody cares about whether you're blushing or whether you stutter on a word or whether anything. People care about themselves, and what's going on in their own lives, and their thoughts are therefore preoccupied with that. If you switch roles and put yourself in the seat listening to somebody else doing a presentation, you'll know what I'm talking about. You listen to a lot of the stuff that the person says, but sometimes your mind drifts and you think about things going on in your own life.

The trick is not to care too much, even if you trip or you put on all your shirt buttons one higher than they should be. It might be amusing for a few seconds but it's immediately forgotten about. It's not primary school anymore :) As somebody said earlier, you'll get better with experience.
 
cerebus said:
Do you have expertise? Then talk at the level of your knowledge.
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Ppl dont always understand the level of my analysis. So I have to dumb it down. I wonder if I dumb it down too much sometimes.

But yeah..looks like its only gonna take experience to get better.
 
I used to suffer badly from this.

If I walk in a room and I start the conversation it would not be so bad, but if I get asked to answer a question I go redder than a Tomato
People don't understand that we feel like everybody is staring at you because you are all red.
And the more I thought about the worse it got.

The way I control it now is by taking command of the conversation, you lead the meeting, it does help.

Talking slower does help, as the more the person asks you to repeat the worse your condition becomes.
 
I had to present my findings to one of our clients today. Normally its over the phone, this time it was in person. I am a ferocious blusher! and hates it!!!
Click to expand...

I used to have this problem, not anymore since I realised that the clients I was dealing with knew less than me so how could they trip me up.
I also made sure i prepped in every department before a meeting, also helps to strike up a conversation with the client on his day or where his from, you might know this you might not, genral chit chat helps ease the tension.
You are only human after all.
 
ant_man said:
...
People don't understand that we feel like everybody is staring at you because you are all red.
And the more I thought about the worse it got...
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Thats it...first I blush a little..then I notice it and then everybody is staring at me cause i'm talking and then I just keep going redder.
 
I must eb honest im fortunate im born a super extrovert have no problem talking to hundreds of people if i needed to but with that being said i hate talking to people over the phone i really battle to do that
 
_Hecate_ said:
humph you're an extrovert. You cant comment :p
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:(

ok il go :p

InSanity said:
I must eb honest im fortunate im born a super extrovert have no problem talking to hundreds of people if i needed to but with that being said i hate talking to people over the phone i really battle to do that
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thats the easiest

i picture people by they voices
 
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