Stealing someone elses GF

[MickeyD]

... So, anyone have advice on helping a chick break up with her bf and hook up with me. I think the major obstacle is going to be finding away that doesn't make her look like the bad guy. I reckon trying to get laid before they are done and dusted is a bad idea.

a way ...

#grammarnazistrike

Then again, you should stay away!

 

[Nick333]

... or you could just be honest with her. Tell her you're a much better fit, and that when she dumps her BF you'd be very keen on bumping uglies.

Yep, think I'll do this.

 

[MickeyD]

Anyway, I think Korn got it right first time. Best course of action is just to hang around and wait till she's single.

Yep... she knows that you and her SO are mates and may be using this to drive a wedge between you two as well - as her parting gift to him.

 

[Maverick Jester]

a way ...

#grammarnazistrike

Then again, you should stay away!

Freudian slip methinks...

 

[GhostSixFour]

Here's what you do:
snip

You're a lonely lonely guy aren't you..

 

[STS]

Here's what you do:

Befriend her boyfriend and make sure to hang out with him a lot while she is around.
While you do this make sure to always look suave. Wear amazing cologne, and make sure that you look better than her boyfriend. This will work on a subconscious level to make her associate you with sexyness.
Always bring gifts to her boyfriend and make sure she sees the gifts; but make sure they are manly gifts, you don't want her to think you are gay. Try stuff like a six pack every now and then, or maybe even a bottle of cologne that you wear. This way, she will associate his smell with yours, and think of you even when you are not around.

Now that you have become friends, they will not be suspicious of you when you are around their house. Here's where the plan comes into action. You need to start sending her threatening mail and emails, maybe even sms's from a new number; don't use yours for obvious reasons. When this has been going on for a while then she will obviously tell her boyfriend about it etc.

Bide your time while still setting up the tone of stalkerishness. You see, you are going to frame her boyfriend for the dodgy messages. You need to plant these things in his house, like the same pens used to write the letters, maybe at the last moment a sim card that you used to send a creepy message.

Then, you set it up for her boyfriend to have an 'accident' *nudge nudge wink wink*.

It's all smooth sailing from there.

You act devastated that he is dead, as of course he is your friend; then you offer to help her clean up his things and conveniently uncover the incriminating 'evidence'.

By that time she will be so sad and confused that her mind will latch on to you as her saviour and protector, and that way you have her for life!

/applauds

 

[Cool E]

I don't think you like her, just wanna taste her biscuit.

 

[Nick333]

a way ...

#grammarnazistrike

Then again, you should stay away!

Sod off.

Nah, think I'll just find an appropriate time to tell her how I feel and leave it at that. I'm really not going to be heart broken or anything if I don't get her.

 

[OGroteKoning]

Sod off.

Nah, think I'll just find an appropriate time to tell her how I feel and leave it at that. I'm really not going to be heart broken or anything if I don't get her.

If you are between 10-15 - Do it on your FB status
If you are between 15 and 22 - WhatsApp her (or any other text messaging system)
... else ... more drinks

 

[Nick333]

Yep... she knows that you and her SO are mates and may be using this to drive a wedge between you two as well - as her parting gift to him.

We're not mates. She only introduced us last week.

 

[MickeyD]

We're not mates. She only introduced us last week.

In that case... SHAG HER! As a test drive, of course...

 

[Johnone]

Here's what you do:

1. Apply the golden rule.

2. Don't get involved (in other's affairs).

3. Forget about the girl.
*****

Too moralistic?

 

[Nick333]

In that case... SHAG HER! As a test drive, of course...

No. You guys are missing the point. I like this girl. I can see myself settling down with her. Shagging as a start to a relationship never ends well for me.

Then again maybe she's just using a rocky patch in her relationship as an excuse for a bit of nooky on the side. To be fair most women I know from the pub might not actually see me as relationship material.

 

[Good.Fellow]

Leave her alone. She has a boyfriend!

 

[GreGorGy]

Leave her alone. She has a boyfriend!

Unless she works with you?

 

[ponder]

She's fair game, he does not own her. Go for it.

 

[MickeyD]

Leave her alone. She has a boyfriend!

/falls off chair

Of all people you should be the last one to offer relationship advice!!!!

 

[Nick333]

Here's what you do:

1. Apply the golden rule.

2. Don't get involved (in other's affairs).

3. Forget about the girl.
*****

Too moralistic?

A bit moralistic yes. I think guys need to treat their gfs better. If I was taking my gf for granted I couldn't very well blame her for wanting out. Seems to me most guys are all charm and cologne when they're looking to hook up then stinky feet and farts once they feel they've got the girl. I have no sympathy.

 

[STS]

No. You guys are missing the point. I like this girl. I can see myself settling down with her. Shagging as a start to a relationship never ends well for me.

Then again maybe she's just using a rocky patch in her relationship as an excuse for a bit of nooky on the side. To be fair most women I know from the pub might not actually see me as relationship material.

Somebody in the vicinity of Nick33, please get up, walk over to him and punch him in the face

Do NOT settle down

 

[knobshine]

Here's what you do:
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Ha, you sound like Dennis from Always Sunny