Weird incident on the beach

[Nerfherder]

So last sunday the family decided to head to the beach for a nice pre-sundown walk/chill. It looked like it was going to be a disaster because my son hadn't napped and as we arrived this massive fog came over.
Still my daughter was desperate to try out her new boogie board and the dog needed a run so we just stuck with it.
The beach wasn't too busy, which is what I prefer, I don't like lots of people but happy to have some people around in case of issues.
This was Milnerton's sunrise beach - with the lagoon. Its not our favourite but its the closest.
So we started out with my daughter boogie boarding, me watching her and playing with the dog and my wife sitting with my son as he played in the sand. Was actually going fine even though there was this crazy fog.
We swapped round and I looked after my son while the wife played with the dog and watched my daughter. I still kept and eye on the dog as she is tricky with strangers and only listens to me.

Then randomly two little girls (twins) can and asked if they could play with my son. I didn't want to be rude and they were similar age so I said ok.
My son was in a fowl mood but let the girls play with his spade etc.. then a few mins later the mom comes up to us and starts taking a video of all the kids. I don't have a huge problem with this but she didn't even ask.
She was making like a tiktok thing and dancing round selfie style with them in the background. Then all of a sudden it was a group of people and they obviously all knew each other all in the video trying to include us.
I was completely disengaged and keeping an eye on my son as well as the rest of the family and basically had my back turned.
Then a man, who was part of the group wants to talk to me, he is asking if the boy is my child - I say yes, he is my kid.
I'm about a metre away from my kid and I can hear that he is crying, like someone kicked sand in his eyes, as I turn to face him I can see that the woman (twins mom) has picked my son up and is holding him by the arms trying to make him dance for their video, he is fighting her and crying.

So I pull him way and take him away from them, they are looking at me confused like WTF just happened. I just said, sorry he is shy.
I just wanted to take him out of the situation so walked away to my wife and I saw they (the group) had gone to swim in the sea.

I was also really confused - like was it a big misunderstanding and did they just have different boundaries ? or was it me.... Then I started worrying about it being an abduction attempt (this kept me up for hours that night)
We just packed up and left, it was very unsettling and my son was clinging to me and very sad.

What stuck in my head was he usually screams for everything, he is very loud. Turns out he was actually sick and the reason he didn't scream his head off was because of a sore throat - this haunts me now.

So yes there was a bit of a cultural barrier possibly, they were foreign, possibly DRC or Kenya based on accents. I keep wanting to believe that they were just overly friendly and misread but wow... so scared that this was something worse.
Usually people read me quite well and don't engage me, especially when the dog is around, pity she was not with us but then again I'd probably have a different problem then.

 

[Sayf777]

When it comes to your kid you be how the f suspicious you want. Dial it up to 10 if you need to. Its unfortunate but thats the way it is. Don't give a flying f what others think.

Doesn't matter what race or where they from, it was definitely suspicious behaviour imo.

Maybe im too suspicious myself in these cases but as I said dial it up to 10 for your kids.

 

[wireddreams]

No one is allowed to touch my kid. You can look and smile. But no touching creep

 

[porchrat]

Strangers can't just touch your kid WTF.

I mean. If your kid is lost and they're trying to help then of course, but not in the scenario you've described. How bizarre.

 

[saor]

I can see that the woman (twins mom) has picked my son up and is holding him by the arms trying to make him dance for their video, he is fighting her and crying.

So I pull him way and take him away from them, they are looking at me confused like WTF just happened. I just said, sorry he is shy.

I have nephews now and nobody ****s with them. Some random does this and my politeness goes out the window. They crossed a line with your kid.

 

[W@P]

For sure i would have told them all to GTFO and go fsck themselves. I am also pretty laid back but if you come and fsck around with my kids Mr nice guy disappears quite quickly.

It's the same as the tannies and kak in the malls or in the shops that always want to touch your baby or toddler while you're holding them. GTFO man.

 

[RedViking]

Sorry, I took my family to the beach as well. I really apologise for the misunderstanding. Have locked them all up again, so all should be safe now. They were practicing Gooi jou suiker op my.

 

[Hemps]

This is more common than you think, we often holiday along the wild coast, former Transkei area.

For some reason the black folk seem to think it's acceptable to come into your space and pick up your children, I even had one try and grab my kid from my arms, claiming they want a photo.

When they were little especially, we'd be in the middle of the beach minding our own business, I also like my space and black folk seem to think it's acceptable to come and sit next you, Hello, Hello, how you, where you from....etc.

Being polite I reply but get to a point where I'm listen here , fark off.

But Ja I have had the come and try pickup your kids moments.
Now that their older it's not so much an issue.

 

[UrBaN963]

Weird incident. I think you were right to be cautious and suspicious. Could have been 100% legit and just a misunderstanding, but you don't know for sure and it's better to be safe.

 

[Nerfherder]

This is more common than you think, we often holiday along the wild coast, former Transkei area.

For some reason the black folk seem to think it's acceptable to come into your space and pick up your children, I even had one try and grab my kid from my arms, claiming they want a photo.

When they were little especially, we'd be in the middle of the beach minding our own business, I also like my space and black folk seem to think it's acceptable to come and sit next you, Hello, Hello, how you, where you from....etc.

Being polite I reply but get to a point where I'm listen here , fark off.

But Ja I have had the come and try pickup your kids moments.
Now that their older it's not so much an issue.

So I think I was more used to it with my daughter and its not just black people, we took my daughter overseas and old Japanese people were a problem. I felt bad because every time they saw a child they acted like it was the first kid they ever saw.

I'm not a very outgoing person so a part of me wants to be less uptight and all the kids are so lonely...

 

[Nerfherder]

For sure i would have told them all to GTFO and go fsck themselves. I am also pretty laid back but if you come and fsck around with my kids Mr nice guy disappears quite quickly.

It's the same as the tannies and kak in the malls or in the shops that always want to touch your baby or toddler while you're holding them. GTFO man.

ya, once my wife was paying for parking and this woman came up to her asking to hold my son (he was 1 month old) the wife declined and the woman became insistent and started arguing with her and wouldn't leave.
Luckily a friend came past... and my wife just went to her, in a second the lady was gone.

Things like that make me want to carry round a cattle prod

 

[Nerfherder]

For sure i would have told them all to GTFO and go fsck themselves. I am also pretty laid back but if you come and fsck around with my kids Mr nice guy disappears quite quickly.

It's the same as the tannies and kak in the malls or in the shops that always want to touch your baby or toddler while you're holding them. GTFO man.

ya, once my wife was paying for parking and this woman came up to her asking to hold my son (he was 1 month old) the wife declined and the woman became insistent and started arguing with her and wouldn't leave.
Luckily a friend came past... and my wife just went to her, in a second the lady was gone.

Things like that make me want to carry round a cattle prod

 

[W@P]

Even worse is when they stick their fscking hands inside the pram to get a better look. Makes me so de moer in.

 

[Nerfherder]

Even worse is when they stick their fscking hands inside the pram to get a better look. Makes me so de moer in.

Ya, and when the kid just fell asleep. My wife actually slapped a woman who wanted to look at our baby while it was sleeping on her chest, they just tried to pull the cover open

 

[Sepeng]

So was it an abduction attempt?
Look I'm naturally a trusting naive person so take this from whence it comes but it doesn't sound like. Empty-ish beach, can't imagine any sort of close escape option available, just sounds like a much harder job than a packed place with access to cars and all that. Of course I'm no kidnapping expert and the fact that the guy started talking to you as the mum had picked up your child is suspicious, but how long would they have to keep you distracted for them to make a break for it? Minutes I'm guessing.
Agreed that they crossed boundaries though, especially in Covid times - folk are generally more likely to keep their distance - and think you handled it correctly.

 

[Nerfherder]

So was it an abduction attempt?
Look I'm naturally a trusting naive person so take this from whence it comes but it doesn't sound like. Empty-ish beach, can't imagine any sort of close escape option available, just sounds like a much harder job than a packed place with access to cars and all that. Of course I'm no kidnapping expert and the fact that the guy started talking to you as the mum had picked up your child is suspicious, but how long would they have to keep you distracted for them to make a break for it? Minutes I'm guessing.
Agreed that they crossed boundaries though, especially in Covid times - folk are generally more likely to keep their distance - and think you handled it correctly.

Ya, I think in the end it was probably just them being idiots but it just really bothered me. I keep trying to reassure myself that it was nothing but that damn anxiety kept me worried all night.
They remained on the beach afterwards so unless they are really stupid they were not aiming to snatch him.
So weird though and if they were going to use those girls to make a distraction its even more disturbing.

 

[ES1]

So last sunday the family decided to head to the beach for a nice pre-sundown walk/chill. It looked like it was going to be a disaster because my son hadn't napped and as we arrived this massive fog came over.
Still my daughter was desperate to try out her new boogie board and the dog needed a run so we just stuck with it.
The beach wasn't too busy, which is what I prefer, I don't like lots of people but happy to have some people around in case of issues.
This was Milnerton's sunrise beach - with the lagoon. Its not our favourite but its the closest.
So we started out with my daughter boogie boarding, me watching her and playing with the dog and my wife sitting with my son as he played in the sand. Was actually going fine even though there was this crazy fog.
We swapped round and I looked after my son while the wife played with the dog and watched my daughter. I still kept and eye on the dog as she is tricky with strangers and only listens to me.

Then randomly two little girls (twins) can and asked if they could play with my son. I didn't want to be rude and they were similar age so I said ok.
My son was in a fowl mood but let the girls play with his spade etc.. then a few mins later the mom comes up to us and starts taking a video of all the kids. I don't have a huge problem with this but she didn't even ask.
She was making like a tiktok thing and dancing round selfie style with them in the background. Then all of a sudden it was a group of people and they obviously all knew each other all in the video trying to include us.
I was completely disengaged and keeping an eye on my son as well as the rest of the family and basically had my back turned.
Then a man, who was part of the group wants to talk to me, he is asking if the boy is my child - I say yes, he is my kid.
I'm about a metre away from my kid and I can hear that he is crying, like someone kicked sand in his eyes, as I turn to face him I can see that the woman (twins mom) has picked my son up and is holding him by the arms trying to make him dance for their video, he is fighting her and crying.

So I pull him way and take him away from them, they are looking at me confused like WTF just happened. I just said, sorry he is shy.
I just wanted to take him out of the situation so walked away to my wife and I saw they (the group) had gone to swim in the sea.

I was also really confused - like was it a big misunderstanding and did they just have different boundaries ? or was it me.... Then I started worrying about it being an abduction attempt (this kept me up for hours that night)
We just packed up and left, it was very unsettling and my son was clinging to me and very sad.

What stuck in my head was he usually screams for everything, he is very loud. Turns out he was actually sick and the reason he didn't scream his head off was because of a sore throat - this haunts me now.

So yes there was a bit of a cultural barrier possibly, they were foreign, possibly DRC or Kenya based on accents. I keep wanting to believe that they were just overly friendly and misread but wow... so scared that this was something worse.
Usually people read me quite well and don't engage me, especially when the dog is around, pity she was not with us but then again I'd probably have a different problem then.

Twice at parks strangers took pictures of mu children WITH them, I was actually also so mad once I doscovered it, it looks like they just like taking pictures with random people's kids. My kids are a little exceptional for their eye and hair colour, but really there is huge differences between boundaries and culture - I think some of them must understand our culture a little better. Popi act is going to be a huge shock to them.

 

[Drifter]

It's the fog people. have to watch out for them. Go read some Stephen King, you will get what I mean.

 

[Pak Fa Fui]

Rule 1, never let strangers take pictures or videos of your kids.

 

[Mista_Mobsta]

Most definitely a difference of culture I would say. We went on holiday to Cape Town in Jan this year and the same happened with my daughter at Strand, Gordons Bay and Blouberg. Kids and parens of other cultures were very quick to enter our personal space to chat and socialise whilst we were on the beach - the beaches were all relatively empty at the time. I think people are just so happy to have person-person contact post-COVID that they tend to forget boundaries and personal space, especially when kids are playing together on the beach. Was it a likely abduction attempt? I highly doubt that but in the same breath, you can't be too careful with your kids! I think you handled it correctly by removing yourselves from the situation and not causing a ruckus.