What would you have done ?

[DigitalSoldier]

So, I never post these kind of questions, but just looking for advice.

Today me and my girlfriend went to visit some of her friends in Potchefstroom and before we drove home, we decided to stop at Spur and we each ordered something to drink. While we were sitting at the table one of the waiters walked by and smiled at her. We both laughed at the guy and then later on he walked past again and smiled at her she ignored it I felt a bit uneasy, but nothing I could really do about it or so I thought.

After that we drove back to JHB and her sister came over with her boyfriend. We told them about the waiter and immediately the sister's boyfriend asked me what did I do when the waiter smiled at my girlfriend. We both said we just laughed about it. The boyfriend then told me that he would not have laughed about it and he would have done something about it. After he said that, I feel kind of pissed off at myself for not doing something about the waiter.

So, what would you have done or could I have done ?

 

[biometrics]

Stab him with a steak knife?

 

[copacetic]

He smiled at her, who cares?

There are lots of people in the world who are not experts at personal boundaries...

*edit*

I'm really trying to imagine a reaction in this scenario that would not make you out to be an insecure boor, and I'm not succeeding.

 

[semaj]

I reckon you did the right thing. It's hard not to look like a douche if you start trouble when a guy does something that isn't obvious or there is little evidence of.

 

[Pooky]

Yeah WTF don't feel guilty, who cares if he smiled at her!

If you said anything you would have looked like such an idiot.

 

[killadoob]

Was he drinking klipdrift at the time of this conversation?

 

[copacetic]

Was he drinking klipdrift at the time of this conversation?

Indeed.

 

[Kornhub]

Dude,it is a waiter and you did the right thing. Me and my ex gfs would laugh at people that do that.

 

[DigitalSoldier]

Was he drinking klipdrift at the time of this conversation?

lol no. But he is very jealous type of person whereas I'm not really the jealous type.

 

[ponder]

Was he drinking klipdrift at the time of this conversation?

Is he from Boksburg, is he a breker?

 

[Mike Hoxbig]

Your sister's bf is a being a macho jackass (no offence). You can't be around your gf every time to see who smiles at her, and even when you are around, acting jealous only shows her that you have no trust in her to decide what's right and wrong. Congrats on being the better man.

 

[copacetic]

lol no. But he is very [-]jealous[/-] insecure type of person whereas I'm not really the [-]jealous[/-] insecure type.

Ftfy.

 

[Ekstasis]

There's not always something hidden when a person smiles at your girlfriend. Some ppl are just friendly without motives. This guy was also a waiter, he's suppose to smile.

You'll know exactly when someone is taking chances.

 

[DigitalSoldier]

There's not always something hidden when a person smiles at your girlfriend. Some ppl are just friendly without motives. This guy was also a waiter, he's suppose to smile

He was not our waiter though. He just walked past and did that.

 

[copacetic]

There's not always something hidden when a person smiles at your girlfriend. Some ppl are just friendly without motives. This guy was also a waiter, he's suppose to smile.

You'll know exactly when someone is taking chances.

What's the worst thing this guy could be doing in this scenario? Smiling at a woman he finds attractive.

So what?

If he started masturbating on the table or something, I could understand a reaction...

 

[Pooky]

He was not our waiter though. He just walked past and did that.

Waiters are meant to smile at everyone!

 

[Lycanthrope]

So, I never post these kind of questions, but just looking for advice.

Today me and my girlfriend went to visit some of her friends in Potchefstroom and before we drove home, we decided to stop at Spur and we each ordered something to drink. While we were sitting at the table one of the waiters walked by and smiled at her. We both laughed at the guy and then later on he walked past again and smiled at her she ignored it I felt a bit uneasy, but nothing I could really do about it or so I thought.

After that we drove back to JHB and her sister came over with her boyfriend. We told them about the waiter and immediately the sister's boyfriend asked me what did I do when the waiter smiled at my girlfriend. We both said we just laughed about it. The boyfriend then told me that he would not have laughed about it and he would have done something about it. After he said that, I feel kind of pissed off at myself for not doing something about the waiter.

So, what would you have done or could I have done ?

I would also just have left it. You're supposed to be in a loving, trusting relationship. Laugh about it because you both know that guy doesn't stand a chance. If he intimidates you then you would feel the need to react, you didn't so that's a good sign.

Your friend's an idiot.

You acted appropriately, maintained your cool and had a chuckle at it.

Maybe there was nothing more to it than a smile? Ridiculous to let yourself go bat**** over something so petty.

I smile at people all the time (one of my possible character flaws), I dread to think someone getting the wrong impression. I'm just friendly in that sort of way

 

[DigitalSoldier]

Your sister's bf is a being a macho jackass (no offence). You can't be around your gf every time to see who smiles at her, and even when you are around, acting jealous only shows her that you have no trust in her to decide what's right and wrong. Congrats on being the better man.

That's my view as well. Whenever some guy tries something with her and I am not around she will always tell me about it and the same goes for me. If my girlfriend got jealous every time something like that happens with me, I will decide not to tell her in future which I think is not healthy for a relationship.

 

[Ekstasis]

He was not our waiter though. He just walked past and did that.

mmmh....still, if you must jump up and save the day each time your girlfriend gets a smile, you'll fall over from exhaustion

Here's my opinion about this kinda thing: I always say women are not retarded imbeciles who can't stand up for themselves. We don't ALWAYS need to intervene, BUT If your woman feels uneasy about a guy in the vicinity, she should tell you - then you react.
I had a friend who was very jealous of his girlfriend. He use to be a doorman at the one club in CT, his girlfriend a stripper at Teazers. When she finished working she normally came to the club. Then all hell broke loose - every time a guy started talking to her, he lost it. So I said to him he must relax, his girlfriend loves him and if she feel she can't handle a guy or if a guy became to tacky, she would come to him and ask for help.

Woman don't always need you to fight their battles, but when they do, they expect you to show up!.

 

[Bobbin]

Is a non-issue.

On a sort of scale:

I would get highly bloodthirsty aggro if my girl was properly threatened. Very upset if she felt uncomfortable and unsafe. Protective but understanding if someone stood on her toes or knocked her drink. But a random smile is nothing to have a fit about or even consider.

Overall though none of it would really be about me.