Where are the single men?

Foxhound5366 said:
ROFL, yeah well ... Lara C, maumau, ice cubes and the rest of the "women" on here got some 'splainin to do.
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Me, Car_B_Om and Nefertiti can be vouched for :D We've been to social things, unlike some other people too afraid to show their faces ;)
 
Akasha said:
Me, Car_B_Om and Nefertiti can be vouched for :D We've been to social things, unlike some other people too afraid to show their faces ;)
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A thousand apologies Akasha, I knew I was forgetting a woman. Your species is so rare on here I just see "unicorn" :P
 
Happy New Year :)

Yikes! Yes, how the heck does one upload a pic? I see links and all that lead .... / take you ... to a pic... but how does one do that?

Also, what's with the 'add friend' option?

There has been quite a bit of banter etc since I last checked this site - will respond tomorrow. Just enjoying the break until 'working' 2017 kicks in!

Funny mermaids were mentioned. Ironic actually.
 
Papaya101 said:
After years of reference to this forum, I signed up as my research of 'online dating' somehow led me here and I got a shock to discover 'available in 10 years time once kids leave school' men.

It's boxing day, we aren't really religious, so this time of year is a rather bland time. And what do people do when they have nothing to do? Ponder. Thats what.

So being 36, single and actually just fine, on days like today, the reality of my actual age kicks in. I look younger (thankful) and I'm super young at heart. But really, in 4 years time I'll be 40. FORTY. Shut the front door - this is a fact. Base this on how fast this past year has gone, I'll be 40 in no time!

That means I best start meeting men who are single. But there are none. And I'm actually perfectly happy being single right now!

This is all very contradicting and it's confusing my mind. Biologically - times ticking in the having a child part of life too. I do want my own kid one day. But I don't want one now nor in the next few years - but a few years is all I have in actuality. See my confusion. To be fair, I think the having kids ship has sailed. I cannot see how it's possible to meet someone (when you are not actually looking), get to know someone well enough to decide if you could be married, and purely for biological reasons have a kid, in the span of four years. And again, I cannot envision that il be interested in having a child in the next 5 years (min) - but that pushes me past 40. Maybe that would change if one meets the right person. Who knows?

So, a bit of a reality check day today. And it peeves me off to a degree that 'aging' is forcing me to make decisions before I feel ready. If I carry as per normal, just pottering about all content I will not meet anyone.

I definitely want a family one day. If I have to adopt, then that's just the way it is.

So today I find myself thinking that if that's what I want one day, I'm going to actively have to make it happen. When that shouldn't be how it is. Surely people meet naturally and things happen organically. Now I'm strapped for time - and that is unlikely to happen.

Everyone I do meet - is married or in a relationship. I think most people in their thirties are - which makes meeting someone all the more difficult and pushes us mid thirty single people into a strange place.

Such a strange place in fact, that I'm considering online dating and im now writing this on a forum. Two days ago, when i was not accutely aware of my age, i would have laughed if someone said id be doing this today! And I'm not keen on online dating one little bit. To me it just seems like such a 'fake' thing. I don't know, just not comfortable with the concept - I think you'd have to sift through a lot of BS and argh it's just weird.

So where are all the thirty year old single men? Does one really have to go the online dating route to meet them? Bar hopping in the hopes of meeting someone is, well just far to much work and too expensive. And most of those people are wipper snappers.

Now I wish there were an over 30's single bar!

And to top it all off, I don't actually think I want to be in a relationship right now. I'm quite happy as things stand. Nothing is making sense.

And then you get people saying 'Mr right will come along when you least expect it'. Really- is this so. I think at 36, it's highly unlikely unless you change and actually start putting yourself 'on the market'.

Rant over!

Am I the only one who wonders such odd things?
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No wonder you are single no Tl;DR's
 
Can't actually find the post that I intended to answer.

My 'career' - well I'm 'self employed'. It's all quite new so we will see how it goes. So far, so good. Many sacrifices. I pretty much do not have weekend life. At all. That is probably why I don't / haven't been meeting people.

Apparently it takes 3 years. Stuck it out for 1. It involves the food industry, I have two of my own brands - and an elite clientele.

Finding work here after the UK was extremely difficult. Working in a bank there, you earn a lot of money. Same position here - the exact opposite.

So I made it happen and started my own thing.

However, the idea is to get this running on its own so I can start focusing on my hobbies. Namely jewellery making (sterling silver), but I also want to make things like tables etc - All very awesome stuff - but that will all take time. We will get there!

I can design / build my own website in dreamweaver, but will somehow need to add a shopping cart to it, for the 'Hobbie things'. I cannot deal with WordPress, it drives me up the wall. So. There you have it. 2017 goals.
 
It's a tough spot. Any startup/new business is going to take a lot of your time. If you dare spend time away (such as on a new partner) then it'll suffer.

But the reverse is also true and the longer you wait the harder it becomes to find someone.

I would suggest some online dating, just get out there and get your feet wet. If you meet someone cool then you have a new friend or two. If you like them and can fit them into your schedule then you can go for more.
 
Papaya101 said:
My 'career' - well I'm 'self employed'. It's all quite new so we will see how it goes. So far, so good. Many sacrifices. I pretty much do not have weekend life. At all. That is probably why I don't / haven't been meeting people.
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Likely a major reason as to why you may not be meeting people. Aside from my self-acknowledged awkwardness in social situations, I pretty much work and study, so I have very little opportunity to get out there and as a consequence I am not meeting new people.
 
With regards to online dating mentioned by others, one thing I observed is that how many people use it for years with no luck.

I tried my hand at Datingbuzz towards the end of 2014 and early 2015 with no luck, but that is probably down to me. Anyway, I stopped actively using it and became a bit of a lurker, logging in every now and then out of curiosity and this has persisted until today. What I noticed is that there was a significant amount of women that I remember from my initial escapades that are still active, evidently still searching. Datingbuzz lets you look at 5 pages of potential matches if you are not a premium member and I recognised at least half of them from over a year ago. The one woman I distinctly remember messaging in 2014/15 before it fizzled out and there she was again, listed as a 97% match.
 
animal531 said:
It's a tough spot. Any startup/new business is going to take a lot of your time. If you dare spend time away (such as on a new partner) then it'll suffer.

But the reverse is also true and the longer you wait the harder it becomes to find someone.

I would suggest some online dating, just get out there and get your feet wet. If you meet someone cool then you have a new friend or two. If you like them and can fit them into your schedule then you can go for more.
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Spot on.

But this year will be good. I've paid off all that I invested (assets) in.

The only bad decision made was assuming a shop would be a good idea because things were doing so well. BAD IDEA. I'll have to suck that up until the lease is over.

Meeting people online - just not for me. It's the fact I'm working odd hours and don't get out.

I'll diss the shop and rather employ someone to free up prime time :)

That's the aim!

Being an adult is hard work.
 
Papaya101 said:
However, the idea is to get this running on its own so I can start focusing on my hobbies. Namely jewellery making (sterling silver), but I also want to make things like tables etc
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So you've got the wedding rings and bridal bed sorted then? :)
 
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