Why do they do this?

Oh I didn't see see this ...

Firstly - no issue with self esteem, Chrissy ;)

The last time I saw her socially was for coffee on the 02 September - where she conned me out of another R900.00 for lunch, make up, groceries etc She offered sexual favours and rubbing, cuddling etc that day. She told me a few days later she had a boyfriend and I wrote her off ... purely because this boyfriend has been around many months and she used me to get the make up etc. She purposely and intentially conned and used.

She phoned me about 4 weeks later to get a piece of clothing - which I dropped off (She was staying with her drug dealers at a hotel at now, as the previous boyfriend learnt who she was and left). It was a 4 minute drop off and leave. She SMS'd just after I left telling me she's never been looked at with such disgust, as I'd looked at her in the 4 minutes.

Another 4 weeks go by and I get an SMS saying 'you were my best friend for years and I miss you'. I asked her to leave me alone and she said fair enough. The following day I get another SMS 'I ate begging - but can you help with money?'. I replied no and instantly received a 'then I'm going to lay a charge at the police for xyz. Start preparing your case'. A few hours later I was asked if I wanted the case number.

I ignored her and haven't heard anything since - about 1.5 months now.
 
I had 10,000 SMS'd on my phone and about 1,000 emails.

However I want to move on with my life and forget everything about her. I've cleared most of them, the emails, her photo's etc.

As I said, she was dodgy but went though a good, clean patch for many years. That's where I met her. Things started getting **** again when she hit the meth and lost everything. She's been a druggy, slutty etc etc from about 14-17 but appeared to change when she had her child.

I've learnt that druggies seldom change though - even if they have clean time for years and years, they'll go back. Also, don't think she's had meth before, so the hold wasn't *as* strong.

With her meth use, doubt she'll see 30
 
very sad. at least you left her and moving on...
 
Excellent posts from blunomore and lush. Sincere insight from the female perspective.

xrapidx said:
Quickest fix - get laid.... not even laid - just hookup - she'll be a distant memory in no time.

And listen to some Staind, Linkin Park - etc... always helps.
Click to expand...
@ xrapidx You hit the nail on the head. But I am more of a nerd than you are, I know why 'hooking up' works. Apparently when you hook up your brain releases chemicals that affect all of us to a greater or lesser degree. It gives us that 'butterflies in the tummy' feeling when you meet an exciting new partner. Better still and more importantly, it works wonders to fill that empty hollow feeling you get after a break up. You shouldn't love her, you shouldn't get serious, you just need to hook up to get that flood of hormone to fill up the empty hollow and then you can move on with your life.

Be strong Dolby. Each day gets a little easier than the day before.

Edit:: FLIP caught again replying to an ancient post. Must remember to check the OP date.
 
Last edited:
Its sad that people sometimes(tm) only show their true colours when your in knee-deep. And with other you just think wtf?
 
technofool said:
Edit:: FLIP caught again replying to an ancient post. Must remember to check the OP date.
Click to expand...

Not that old at least ;)

alf101 said:
Don't worry, come back in 2 years and he still won't be over her.
Click to expand...

And to fill everyone in ... he's the other guy *cough*

chrissy said:
Its sad that people sometimes(tm) only show their true colours when your in knee-deep. And with other you just think wtf?
Click to expand...

Dig at me or her?
 
You didn't tell us mush about yourself, but it does sound like you're a push-over, R900? She does leave a bad taste in my mouth, if you have children you must keep yourself out of risky situations. Period.
 
No ... 'we' don't have kids. SHE has a daughter - whom she has no guardianship or custody over due to her past and doesn't with live her.

R900.00 is nothing : R8,000.00 in March .... R5,000.00 in April .... R5,000.00 in May. During August when I still really disliked her, I gave her money for 'petrol' and to 'repair her car' every week. As much as I'm screwed for money, I lent her close on R30,000.00 which I've lost. And there's much more than simply money too *shrug* She's sleep with 10 drug dealer (unprotected) over a few weeks and have no issues trying to pull me into bed - no cares about HIV or STDs.

Yea - my fault for giving into her over and over again, but she's still (slightly) human and we still lived together for a few years and were at one point talking of marriage. Regardless of what I seem on here, I still cared and *anyone* will tell you that. I'm not as much of an arsehole as I may seem :P

In fact, despite what's she done to me and taken from me, I still hope she comes right and meets someone that can solve her issues. I just know it won't happen.

As for disliking women (at this stage), surely you can't blame me? It's only been a month since i last heard from her.
 
Last edited:
One though cycle to get out of. But ja, best thing to do is to cut the cords. If you're not around drugs you can't see how big the problem is, just wish that our youth wouldn't throw their lives away like that.
 
she seems to be suffering from a self-destructive behavior problem. Was she abused as a child?
 
shame man. i know ppl like that cause endless emotional distress for others but i do feel for them, often the disorder is deeper than what one can control with their sanity.

Well, at least you're moving forward.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top
Sign up to the MyBroadband newsletter
X