Why have kids?

Carol35 said:
In all honesty, I have absolutely no answer to your question even though I have 2 of my own. I dont know why I had them, it was just the next progression after meeting my husband I suppose, what was expected of me.

Parenting must be the most thankless job known to man and dont flame me but sometimes I think my life would have been more pleasurable if I didnt have kids. They are lovely, endearing and cute when they are little, but they dont stay that way. We have very high hopes of my son being an intelligent, productive member of society but I can see his free spirit. Its a constant worry (especially when he announced he has no plans of going to uni/college and will get a job serving pancakes at the beach. :erm: )
and it seems we would have paid 15 plus years of education fees and all the extra's for naught.

That being said, dont get me wrong..I adore my children. They do bring me great joy and constantly shower their affection on me but yes, I do wonder if there was more to life than this. :)
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Thank you! At least someone is honest.
 
All the reasons given for having kids seem centered around selfishness and vanity.
 
The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with R 1 681 470.00 for a middle income family. Talk about price shock! That doesn't even touch college tuition.

But R 1 681 470.00 isn't so bad if you break it down. It translates into:

R 93 414.93 a year,
R 7 784.49 a month,
R 1 796.34 a week.
A mere R 254.52 a day!
Just over R 10.50 an hour.

Still, you might think the best financial advice is: don't have children if you want to be 'rich.' Actually, it is just the opposite.

What do you get for your R 1 681 470.00?

• Naming rights. First, middle, and last!
• Glimpses of God every day.
• Giggles under the covers every night.
• More love than your heart can hold.
• Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.
• Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies.
• A hand to hold usually covered with jelly or chocolate.
• A partner for blowing bubbles and flying kites.
• Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.

For R 1 681 470.00, you never have to grow up. You get to:

• finger-paint,
• carve pumpkins,
• play hide-and-seek,
• catch lightning bugs,
• never stop believing in Santa Claus.

You have an excuse to:
• keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh,
• watch Saturday morning cartoons,
• go to Disney movies, and
• wish on stars.
• You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator magnets and collect spray painted noodlewreaths for Christmas, hand prints set in clay for Mother's Day, and cards with backward letters for Father's Day.

For a mere R 254.52 a day, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for:

• retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof,
• taking the training wheels off a bike,
• removing a splinter,
• filling a paddling pool,
• coaxing a wad of gum out of hairs, and
• coaching a rugby team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream regardless.

You get a front row seat in history to witness the:
- First step,
- First word,
- First bra,
- First date,
- First time behind the wheel.

You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your family tree, and if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren and great-grandchildren. You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications, and human sexuality that no college can match..

In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there under God. You have all the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits, so one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost. That is quite a deal for the price!!!!!!!

Love & enjoy your children & grandchildren & great-grandchildren!!!!!!!

It's the best investment you'll ever make!!!!!!!!!
 
I think people generally have kids because it's the norm and because of biological programming. I even have moments when I think it would be cool from time to time. The urge tends to pass quickly after spending time around other people and their kids. It just seems too easy to fcck them up.

I think a lot of people lack the level of maturity required to be good parents.
 
Until such time as you have your own kids, you simply will never understand.
 
dont wanna hijack the thread... but I have a closely related question...

I only want ONE kid. Not 1/2 and not 2, ONE! I tell people this and its always something like this..

"oh its ok, you will come around"
"dont be so selfish, stop thinking about only yourself"
":rolleyes:"
"you still young you dont understand how life works"
"its better in the long-run, they look after themselves"

to which my reply is usually something like... "have you finished justifying yet?"
 
Grimspoon said:
Until such time as you have your own kids, you simply will never understand.
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Could not have said it better myself,

Something just switches on the second you see your little one for the first time,
 
ijacobs3 said:
Could not have said it better myself,

Something just switches on the second you see your little one for the first time,
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That's hardly a reason for having kids then is it? "I had a kid because the second I had a kid..." See what I mean?
 
techead said:
dont wanna hijack the thread... but I have a closely related question...

I only want ONE kid. Not 1/2 and not 2, ONE! I tell people this and its always something like this..

"oh its ok, you will come around"
"dont be so selfish, stop thinking about only yourself"
":rolleyes:"
"you still young you dont understand how life works"
"its better in the long-run, they look after themselves"

to which my reply is usually something like... "have you finished justifying yet?"
Click to expand...
Exactly, there are advantages to having just one, both for the parents and the child.

Devill said:
Q: Why have kid(s)?

A: Cheap labour.
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Turns out it's probably cheaper to hire that Congolese guy.

Carol35 said:
We have very high hopes of my son being an intelligent, productive member of society but I can see his free spirit. Its a constant worry (especially when he announced he has no plans of going to uni/college and will get a job serving pancakes at the beach. :erm: )
and it seems we would have paid 15 plus years of education fees and all the extra's for naught.
Click to expand...
I think university is overrated unless your goal is a field that specifically needs tertiary education. I am all for gaining knowledge as an end in itself, but it is not strictly necessary to take up formal study beyond school.
 
I being the free spirit I was, couldn't comprehend having a son. My son was unexpected and the full impact of being a dad didn't hit me until he was actually born and shivering in a blanket.

If you believe love is the most important thing in the world, I can tell you having a kid is the best way to show it. You make a human being, you guide him and look after him and you become the most important thing in his life, and even if you love your parents, your wife, your brothers or your pets, no love comes close to that of your loving your own child.

The best part of my day isn't coming home and playing Skyrim, ****ing my wife or logging onto this forum to argue with idiots, it's playing with my kid, who is completely unpredictable and who just wants to be with his daddy.

==============

I couldn't give a **** if there are already too many people on this planet, if my legacy goes on or what the social pressures are. Because of my son I already want another child, and I will love my son whether he wants to be a beach bum one day or if his views on life contradict mine ;)
 
smalltownsky said:
I would blame the parenting in much the same way I'd blame the teacher, the manager, the politician or the driver. ;)
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You can take a horse to water, you cant force it to drink. Anyhow, I never said that I wouldn't love my son if he became a beach-bum, in fact, it suits his personality. At 16, he is very happy-go-lucky and is an awesome kid. However, like ANY parent, we all have hopes and dreams for our children and want whats best for them. Even though I know what we dreamed for him is likely not a reality, being a 35yr old beach bum still living at home makes him a little less likable. :D

And seriously, a child's personality or the way they "turn" out has absolutely nothing to do with the way they were parented.
There are millions of good children from good families that have gone bad!
 
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