Going to Fast - GF

R

RichardG

Honorary Master
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Johannesburg/Jozzi South Africa
I have been going out with this lady I have known for about 4 weeks.
Met via Speed Date on Facebook.. We were like in contact for like 2 days before deciding to meet, now we are like basically going out at least 3 - 4 times a week and sometimes spending our whole weekends together.

She is someone I connect with and I was open on how I felt about her and she feels the same way. She always phones me up once she arrives at work in the morning and her boss wants to offer me a job to go work for the same company she works for.

I think she is truly the one or is it just love at first site.
To be honest she is the first girlfriend I ever have and I feel so safe around her company, trust, honesty, etc.

I seriously want to propose to her by next year on her birthday.

Or am jumping the gun to fast. I seriously need some advice here, and I cannot ask DR PHILL!!!


NO, WE'VE NOT SLEPT WITH EACH OTHER!!!
Last thing on my mind as we made it clear.
 
RichardG said:
I have been going out with this lady I have known for about 4 weeks.
Met via Speed Date on Facebook.. We were like in contact for like 2 days before deciding to meet, now we are like basically going out at least 3 - 4 times a week and sometimes spending our whole weekends together.

She is someone I connect with and I was open on how I felt about her and she feels the same way. She always phones me up once she arrives at work in the morning and her boss wants to offer me a job to go work for the same company she works for.

I think she is truly the one or is it just love at first site.
To be honest she is the first girlfriend I ever have and I feel so safe around her company, trust, honesty, etc.

I seriously want to propose to her by next year on her birthday.

Or am jumping the gun to fast. I seriously need some advice here, and I cannot ask DR PHILL!!!


NO, WE'VE NOT SLEPT WITH EACH OTHER!!!
Last thing on my mind as we made it clear.
Click to expand...

Richard G

To be very honest:

You're still very much in love at the present moment. I would suggest you distance yourself from such thoughts till you have at least been with her for a little longer.

This however could be the wrong advice. Allot of people get married just after meeting each other and lives happily ever after for 10's of years.

Best is to follow your head and not your heart on this one. Give your heart time to settle from this love potion it's on and then make an educated decision.
 
I think you might be moving just a tad too fast there.....
Whats the rush? Take your time and really get to know her a bit better.
 
NO, WE'VE NOT SLEPT WITH EACH OTHER!!!
Last thing on my mind as we made it clear.

when are you playing to do this? take it easy man. woman will break your heart when you at least expected...

take it easy.
 
Your first g/f? It sounds like you're rushing. Give it a little time and get to know each other after this "honeymoon, head-over-heels period" which you're in.

It's wonderful to be in love, but be quite sure that you are ready to spend your life with that person.
 
I have been speaking to her solid for more than 200 hours +-. She has told me secrets that she has never told anyone else before but yeah perhaps I am moving to fast.

Maybe I am afraid I will loose her. She is just 5 months younger than me and maybe god brought us together for a reason.

I have changed my whole attitude towards life and a much more positive person.


Maybe cause I thought I would never find anyone who would like me for me.

And she actually did. I thought she would stand me up. I was wrong she never did.

We like connect in so many ways - we both been through a lot of crap in our lives. And she is going to move in end of this month.

We decided not to sleep with each other until we're both ready..
She is not the virgin - I am !

I was very clear from the word go!
 
RichardG said:
I have been going out with this lady I have known for about 4 weeks.
Met via Speed Date on Facebook.. We were like in contact for like 2 days before deciding to meet, now we are like basically going out at least 3 - 4 times a week and sometimes spending our whole weekends together.

She is someone I connect with and I was open on how I felt about her and she feels the same way. She always phones me up once she arrives at work in the morning and her boss wants to offer me a job to go work for the same company she works for.

I think she is truly the one or is it just love at first site.
To be honest she is the first girlfriend I ever have and I feel so safe around her company, trust, honesty, etc.

I seriously want to propose to her by next year on her birthday.

Or am jumping the gun to fast. I seriously need some advice here, and I cannot ask DR PHILL!!!


NO, WE'VE NOT SLEPT WITH EACH OTHER!!!
Last thing on my mind as we made it clear.
Click to expand...

What ever you do dont rush it man, and dont rush decisions..
Its way to early to be thinking about marriage, you still need at least 6/7 months under your belt to get an idea of what you guys are like together.
The beginning is always intense, and you want to spend as much time together as possible but this could also go bad. Moderation at first is important, or the spark can die off quickly.
Just take it slow, keep your head level and your emotions on par with your head. If you guys get on well, then the next year will fly by and you wont even realise it.
Sex in the beginning can be bad, and a relationship can be based around it if it starts early. When it feels right, is the best time to do it. Thats always the most intense...

Just take it slow and dont stress about it - you have all the time in the world...
 
RichardG said:
I have been going out with this lady I have known for about 4 weeks.
Met via Speed Date on Facebook.. We were like in contact for like 2 days before deciding to meet, now we are like basically going out at least 3 - 4 times a week and sometimes spending our whole weekends together.

She is someone I connect with and I was open on how I felt about her and she feels the same way. She always phones me up once she arrives at work in the morning and her boss wants to offer me a job to go work for the same company she works for.

I think she is truly the one or is it just love at first site.
To be honest she is the first girlfriend I ever have and I feel so safe around her company, trust, honesty, etc.

I seriously want to propose to her by next year on her birthday.

Or am jumping the gun to fast. I seriously need some advice here, and I cannot ask DR PHILL!!!


NO, WE'VE NOT SLEPT WITH EACH OTHER!!!
Last thing on my mind as we made it clear.
Click to expand...

You are definitely going too fast, slow down for a minute and let it all mellow. One thing you can do for yourself is to cut down on the expectations...its not like you're running 100m at the Olympics.

When it comes to new relationships, I've taught myself to expect the least and it has helped me keep perspective for the times when things went horribly wrong.
 
Speak to her first about how you feel before going out to buy a ring and just poping the big Q. Even though she likes you a lot she might not be ready to have the relationship move quite as fast as you would like it to. Just be patient, if the relationship is meant to be it will be. :)
 
RichardG said:
I have been speaking to her solid for more than 200 hours +-. She has told me secrets that she has never told anyone else before but yeah perhaps I am moving to fast.

Maybe I am afraid I will loose her. She is just 5 months younger than me and maybe god brought us together for a reason.

I have changed my whole attitude towards life and a much more positive person.


Maybe cause I thought I would never find anyone who would like me for me.

And she actually did. I thought she would stand me up. I was wrong she never did.

We like connect in so many ways - we both been through a lot of crap in our lives. And she is going to move in end of this month.

We decided not to sleep with each other until we're both ready..
She is not the virgin - I am !

I was very clear from the word go!
Click to expand...

You haven'e even seen her in the nood and you are thinking marrage already. Bra there is more to love than having sex, telling you all her secrets,etc.

You need to see her when she is stresses, when she is happy, bra you need to take a chill pill.

there is no rush man. take it easy. how old are you. 17?
 
She knows how I feel about her and she feels the same way about me. Many men have fked her around, and I have met all friends.

Maybe I should let her make the first moves :) -- She already does that like tonight we on for another date. I cannot even keep up. I came home at about 3 am, she was up at 4:30 am and already at the office at 6am..

She is very dedicated to work..

I will see how things go, wont be in S.A for a month.

koeks said:
You haven'e even seen her in the nood and you are thinking marrage already. Bra there is more to love than having sex, telling you all her secrets,etc.

You need to see her when she is stresses, when she is happy, bra you need to take a chill pill.

there is no rush man. take it easy. how old are you. 17?
Click to expand...

I have seen her under a lot of pressure. I even go to her place and help her finish work until about 1 am.... I am 24 mate. ..

She has more stress than what any of us do... She starts work at around 6 am and finishes sometimes at 8 PM.
 
Last edited:
hahaha. you sound 16... brother wait a minute man or you will fall flat on your chin...

you are ridiculous. i bet you are smiling alone right now thinking about tonight. hahaha
 
RichardG said:
We were like in contact for like 2 days before deciding to meet, now we are like basically going out at least 3 - 4 times a week and sometimes spending our whole weekends together.
Click to expand...

That part tells me you're too young to get married. The last time I heard the word like used that often was... Can't even remember! Edit: PurePwnage. That's where I heard it!

Anyway, trust me, you don't want to rush things. I was the same during the beginning phases of my first relationship. First get to know each other for a few more months.
 
No need to rush it.

Just take it easy man and enjoy the moment. To be perfectly honest it sounds like you're subconciously trying to rush into getting married so you don't loose her or something like that.

I'm not gonna spew any of this if it was meant to be stuff cause relationships take work. Thing is you shouldn't rush into such a big decision because if you're going to be together forever, you've still got a lot of time. What difference does it make if you get married now or after a year? If after a year you're not together anymore, then the marriage probably wouldn't have worked anyways.

So just take it slow and enjoy it :D
 
Spend the hollidays together and see how things look a little later in 2009.

Maybe meet her familey and take her to meet yours.

If the job is good and you think its in your line take it :)

But if you already have a nice job maybe stick with it.

/ just my 2c

Ps Good luck and enjoy :D
 
How old are you? woman come and go and feelings such as these fade away... bra you need to take some time out here. you are on the fast lane... doing 180km/h and you are about to crash that car of your. slow down and move to the middle lane... is this your first girlfriend?
 
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