Dilemma

Just do it already! It's not like you want to marry this girl, just have some fun and rubber up!
 
neoprema said:
She's shallower than a bird bath.

Today you're the flavor of the week, tomorrow when you have problem you'll be yesterday's news. Drop her, fast.
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Projecting much?

You don't know her situation or all the relevant context.
 
Senor said:
And that is why I have resisted all this time. She wanted to go out a few times and I always made up some excuse.
But I'll be honest and confess that my resistance is weakening
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I was going to say go for it - but then got worried it was my own mom :crying:

Assuming its not my mom.... go for it. Just make sure you are more of a comfort than a source of pain

If this is what she needs right now then why deny her some joy and affection ?
Just be caring and supportive as well.

Imagine she just goes with some dork from Tinder that messes her around while the hubby is dying...
 
Do unto others. How would you feel if you where the sick friend and someone did it to you? Sounds like you could make it an honest relationship in not that long anyways. Just wait a bit. It will go easier on your conscience and make you look a lot less like a massive tosser to everyone who knows them or you. That is me though.
 
epah said:
He is going to find out eventually, Cheaters always mess up and get caught.
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I suspect at some point the husband did become suspicious because she would always want me to join them on outings... That explains why he sort of cut contact with me almost completely a few years ago. I just left it at that, because honestly I felt kak being near him because of that one incident with her.
 
Cius said:
Do unto others. How would you feel if you where the sick friend and someone did it to you? Sounds like you could make it an honest relationship in not that long anyways. Just wait a bit. It will go easier on your conscience and make you look a lot less like a massive tosser to everyone who knows them or you. That is me though.
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Man have I thought of that exactly. It's a terribly evil thing to do. Almost wish I didn't have a conscience
 
And if you are thinking about her feelings just think about this. The kids will find out at some point and it would possible permanently damage their relationship with their mom. Not a recipe for happiness. Sorry to say, but acting on this is more selfish than altruistic.
 
Senor said:
So I find myself in a position that I just ca not decide what to do. I welcome any and all comments, opinions, criticism, whatever.

I'm divorced and have been single for the last 5 years. Divorced for 11 years though.

A friend of mine that I used to be quite close to years back, in that we would go out together etc, even when he met his wife, I was there and spent time with them as well.

Fast forward 15 years, the friend, whom I now rarely see or visit is quite ill, and in and out of hospital etc. His wife though has remained in contact with me almost throughout. Never forgetting birthdays and stuff.

There was this one time a few years back when she visited me at home, unexpectedly , and we ended up having wine and just kissing and touching etc.. Nothing more, clothes never came off. Never did that again or even met alone since, but remained in contact.

Now, she's totally wants to hook up, but I feel guilty about pursuing this. There's kids and a terminally ill husband involved. She's also under pressure trying to keep everything together at home.

Would I be helping her and everyone by just comforting/destressing her, or is this something that I should just stay away from. It does feel wrong to me....let that much be clear.

But damn I'm tempted...so very much.
She's like quite hot as well... Slim, tall, terrific personality...
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Spyker, bro. Spyker.
 
How longs does he have left?

Asking since there will be no point in letting her get much older before you tap her.
There is a saying in Afrikaans - Die een se dood is die ander se brood d00s

But, I think you have tapped her already and are now just checking how many people would be OK with it.
 
neoprema said:
Nope, I just don't like manipulative wh...
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Someone clearly pissed in your porridge ... I get it.

It does not mean all woman are the same - she is going through trauma and will not be thinking straight or making sound decisions right now.
I can assure you she is barely keeping it all together which is why I suggested the OP rather be there for her and then in time pursue a relationship when she is in a better head space.
 
Cius said:
And if you are thinking about her feelings just think about this. The kids will find out at some point and it would possible permanently damage their relationship with their mom. Not a recipe for happiness. Sorry to say, but acting on this is more selfish than altruistic.
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If the kids care about their mother they'll let he have some fun.
 
Nerfherder said:
Imagine she just goes with some dork from Tinder that messes her around while the hubby is dying...
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That would end up being a meaningless and empty **** she will regret.
Not worth it in my humble opinion.
 
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