Emigration to the USA

VikashLurker said:
Never emigrate because you running away from something, emigrate because you looking forward to new opportunities. That's kind of my attitude here.
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That's the right attitude... If you're "running away", you'll definitely want to return imo. You're just trading one set of opportunities for other, better opportunities. There's advantages and disadvantages. I find kids who are raised in a home where the parents emigrated are much better off than kids who stayed in the same town for 15+ years. The exposure does miracles to their outlook, maturity and way of thinking... You're doing your kids a big favour OP.
 
VikashLurker said:
Okay so lets take the actual destination out of this picture.

Is cold feet not just part of journey? Anyone else who has made the trek overseas, did you not have the same sort of feelings? I am really just hoping that this is the initial shock to the system response, and later she is going to warm up to the idea.

Can we speak to a support group of some kind? (We based in JHB)
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Cold feet, yes. Undoubtedly, but push through it. The closer the departure date came the more we thought "WTF have we gone and did?"

The wife was VERY wary of the whole thing. Took her about three months to settle down. Got a job and never looked back after that day.

Don't speak to a support group AND avoid any and all expats for at least a year after your arrival. I've never in my life met a more negative human being than an expat. The standard refrain starting with: "But back home..........................".

I can say without a shadow of a doubt that it will be the greatest experience of your lives.

For context we moved from a very comfortable life in Pretoria to Abu Dhabi in UAE. Before that I've never been to AD in my life. Left SA with two suitcases and two cats. Best. Thing. Ever.
 
R4ziel said:
If you haven't been there at all I would not commit to moving there. the US is a completely different lifestyle and if you have it as comfortable as you describe it here i would definitely consider more research if I was you. Moving overseas is not a joke as there are many many other factors to be aware of, its more than just a little lifestyle change.

Depending on the area the people can also be something extreme to get used to, we visited my uncle in New Jersey and I wanted to move there initially. After a week I couldn't wait to get away and I definitely know I would not live in the United States unless I am absolutely forced to.
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Sorry for going off-topic, but what were some of the cultural differences you found, most people I spoke to who have been to the U.S. said the Americans are friendly and helpful, or if not cultural differences what was it that put you off ?
 
After a week I couldn't wait to get away
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OP, there is a galaxy of difference between visiting a place and living in a place. When you visit you look at the place from a tourist perspective. When you live in a place you look at it from a resident perspective. And these two viewpoints are worlds apart.

Tourist Abu Dhabi:
-God it's expensive.
-People drive like maniacs.
-God it's hot.
-People are unfriendly.
-It's a desert.

Resident Abu Dhabi:
It's home.
 
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VikashLurker said:
Okay so lets take the actual destination out of this picture.

Is cold feet not just part of journey? Anyone else who has made the trek overseas, did you not have the same sort of feelings? I am really just hoping that this is the initial shock to the system response, and later she is going to warm up to the idea.

Can we speak to a support group of some kind? (We based in JHB)
Click to expand...

Moved to Chicago for a year. The initial move is rough and the first couple of months can be lonely. It'll be made easier that you have a family so at least you'll have each other. Its normal to be nervous but I don't think you'll regret trying it out.

Honestly, despite what the perception of Americans is, they are some of the friendliest people. Even in a place like Chicago where the people are 'colder' than other states; I had no problem making friends both through work and outside of it. The fact that you have kids is also going to make it easier because there will be school events, parties etc. where you'll meet other parents and people and make it easier to transition into the city.

If you and your family are the type of people who like to do stuff and get involved, you'll have no problems adapting. Homesickness will always be there but its more a temporary feeling (at least it was for me) than something you struggle with all the time.
 
Moved CPT to Chicago a year ago. Best decision i have ever made. USA totally different culture, weather and people But what a GREAT country where things work!
 
What would tour salary be? North kakalaki is awesome....out in the country it's a bliss. You will be exposed to some of the best cooking in your life. Southerners are a lot like afrikaaner. Family life is important there. They are extra friendly. Many still go pick berries in the wild. Fishing is a big thing. College sports....got the tar heels and Duke. Nags head!!!!
 
There are always cultural differences, no matter where you go. Even moving around SA. We moved to the UK, despite only having spent only a week in the country before. The only real cultural block is language. Moving to an English speaking country(can debate whether Americans actually speak English in a separate thread :) ), makes it easier to overcome any cultural differences. As suggested, go with a view of trying it out for about 2 years. I strongly suggest you plan on a visit back to your wife's parents within a year. Or even 6 months if you can. This helps a lot in easing things. Plan on returning if things don't work out. At the outset, don't regard the possibility of returning to SA as a failure or the whole thing as a waste of time. Set your family up with something like Skype etc., so that you can keep in touch regularly.
 
shinji said:
Go over and work there for a while, then get the SO and kids to join.
A friend of mine works for Cisco and did this - he went over sorted the house, cars etc. had the wife and kids visit on holiday (Christmas) then had them go over once everything was settled.

Keep in mind, you can always have someone (like a family member) rent your place etc etc. keeping your options open.
You don't have to emigrate to work there do you?
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I went to high school.woth one of the senior sales people at Cisco.
 
etienne_marais said:
Sorry for going off-topic, but what were some of the cultural differences you found, most people I spoke to who have been to the U.S. said the Americans are friendly and helpful, or if not cultural differences what was it that put you off ?
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New Jersey is full of ass hats.
 
I've been in the US for a while now. NC is definitely a place that people want to go - I know many people who have moved away from the SF Bay Area to go to NC (Raleigh, Greensboro and Chapel Hill (great university there)), for the low costs and high standard of living. I prefer bigger cities myself, but if you're not a big urban type, I expect it would be a good fit.

Some things to check into is that your visa type is a "dual intent" visa (that allows you to apply for a green card). It would suck if you really settled in and then had to leave after a few years.

I wouldn't worry about cultural differences - this is just part of the experience. US culture is also so different from state to state and even city to city, it's just something to experience and learn from (if there is something that grates you, moving to another city can provide a completely different experience).

The family-back-in-SA thing is always a bit though, but with Skype (and such) and the low cost of flights when you're making dollars, it usually isn't an issue.

Good luck!
 
Eskimos said:
Moved to Chicago for a year. The initial move is rough and the first couple of months can be lonely. It'll be made easier that you have a family so at least you'll have each other. Its normal to be nervous but I don't think you'll regret trying it out.

Honestly, despite what the perception of Americans is, they are some of the friendliest people. Even in a place like Chicago where the people are 'colder' than other states; I had no problem making friends both through work and outside of it. The fact that you have kids is also going to make it easier because there will be school events, parties etc. where you'll meet other parents and people and make it easier to transition into the city.

If you and your family are the type of people who like to do stuff and get involved, you'll have no problems adapting. Homesickness will always be there but its more a temporary feeling (at least it was for me) than something you struggle with all the time.
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Crazyhorse said:
Moved CPT to Chicago a year ago. Best decision i have ever made. USA totally different culture, weather and people But what a GREAT country where things work!
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I love Chicago!

etienne_marais said:
Sorry for going off-topic, but what were some of the cultural differences you found, most people I spoke to who have been to the U.S. said the Americans are friendly and helpful, or if not cultural differences what was it that put you off ?
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There is some truth in the stereotypes. New Yorkers can be direct to the point of being rude, LA types will always be nice, but aren't always sincere. Some states are extremely provincial with people who know nothing outside of their county.

Of course some people appreciate directness, and also, not everyone in NY is rude - far from it. There are also great people in LA, and world wide and educated people from Alabama. Really, it's just that the mix is different, and that can influence one's experience. It's really not as big a factor as people make out.
 
That is unfortunately a sizable problem. If the SO doesn't buy in to the plan then its dead....

JStrike said:
You really should not emigrate to a place you have never spent some time in.
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Sometimes life requires a leap of faith.

I never even visited the country I emigrated to. Jumped blindly - best decision I've ever made.

That said if one does have the luxury of checking it out first of would be stupid not to do so.
 
HavocXphere said:
That is unfortunately a sizable problem. If the SO doesn't buy in to the plan then its dead....


Sometimes life requires a leap of faith.

I never even visited the country I emigrated to. Jumped blindly - best decision I've ever made.

That said if one does have the luxury of checking it out first of would be stupid not to do so.
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Yeah, same here. There is obviously quite a bit of risk in that, as research can only take you so far before actually experiencing a place.
 
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