First Date Tips

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_Hecate_

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What dating tips do you have. Especially on a first date. I've gone on a couple of dates recently where I met guys from online sites but it turns out they are mostly interested in one thing.

I'd like to hear from women (yes...I know long shot) how do you spot these men before the time and from men...do you always have one particular goal in mind?

Online dating = prowling grounds

Also any other tips regarding dating in general..the do's and donts.
 
Online dating doesn't really filter out the chancers...

First dates.... meet at a nice cosy or social place for a drink or coffee and get to know the person....

First date is the screening ... at least after that you get an vague idea about the person and hopefully enough info to realise if they are worth it or only after 1 night stand.
 
Only done online dating once, i didnt do it all for the nookie though. Sadly, whilst she appeared to be the full package, she was severely unstable.
 
Go on a date with korn1 :cool: Not sure how you can spot them but no we don't but maybe sex can be considered a long term goal :D
 
first-date-2.jpg
 
I've never really done the dating around thing but my first instinct is to agree with cube. A first date particularly from a cold online source should be as non-romantic and public as possible. And you must be non-committal, frank and self-respecting in order to avoid the predatorial/single-motivation types who I guess must proliferate these sites.
 
Online dating ?

1. Send the guys for a polygraph test .
2. Have a checklist in place.








3. Don't wear panties.....:p ( incase you need to take 'em off )
 
OK, the assumption is that OP is female (i honestly don't know), should it not say Grandmistress instead of Grandmaster? If OP is male, Singhdude's point number three is still relevant, I suppose...

I am not an all knowing being in this field, but whether you are male or female, rather be skeptical and use your common sense.
 
LOL Worst advice ever Singhdude!

Normally it is for coffee on the first date and I always offer to pay for myself. Its was just really unexpected for the latest one to be getting sexting messages afterwards :/
 
_Hecate_ said:
What dating tips do you have. Especially on a first date. I've gone on a couple of dates recently where I met guys from online sites but it turns out they are mostly interested in one thing.

I'd like to hear from women (yes...I know long shot) how do you spot these men before the time and from men...do you always have one particular goal in mind?

Online dating = prowling grounds

Also any other tips regarding dating in general..the do's and donts.
Click to expand...

For how long have you been communicating with the fellow? (Prior to agreeing to meet that is)
 
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Guys expect girls who expose themselves online to be ready for a bit of rough and tumble.Its just the nature of the beast that is the internet.
The idea is to turn the tables on a randy suitor and keep him on a leash.Maybe he's friend or brother is the type of guy you're really looking for and you might eventually get an into.
 
I've found that the old-fashioned approach to dating (whether online or any other way) works best.

Dating should be reserved for when two people have already gotten to know each other a bit and both agree to pursue a serious relationship with the intention of long-term commitment or marriage.
Any form of social interaction before then should be casual, preferably in group format, and just as friends.

A lot of people these days date each other so they can get to know one another. That's all wrong. You should only start dating AFTER you've gotten to know each other a bit.
So I would say, if your online dates are all just guys looking to get laid, or in a hurry to get physical, then try inviting your "date" to a group event with friends, or to some activity with other people. There are lots of opportunities for social interaction without being alone with a stranger on a first or second or third date. Even if it's a "double-date" - never do the first few dates alone or in a private place.

When it comes to online dating, be very clear about your expectations in this regard in your profile, or up-front. You'll find that simply telling your potential date that you don't do one-night-stands, or you don't get physical unless the relationship is serious or you are looking for a gentleman with old-school values and courtesy will help get rid of the wrong guys and help you to find the right kind of guy.
 
I stay away from online dating and blind dates. Besides for the freak factor and incompatibility, it takes so much time and energy and can be really awkward as we try put on and maintain our best face. Rather get into some good social circles with people who have the same values as you and lots of single friends.
 
As long as you're not morbidly obese, horrendously ugly or have some sort of freakish "anomaly" with your body you should still get laid so there's nothing to worry about...
 
cerebus said:
I've never really done the dating around thing but my first instinct is to agree with cube. A first date particularly from a cold online source should be as non-romantic and public as possible. And you must be non-committal, frank and self-respecting in order to avoid the predatorial/single-motivation types who I guess must proliferate these sites.
Click to expand...

Why do you make the assumption that those sorts proliferate on dating sites specifically?
 
Athol said:
For how long have you been communicating with the fellow? (Prior to agreeing to meet that is)
Click to expand...

Not long actually, probably two days. I found that chatting to long before the time and getting to know the person to well before the time leads to disappointment when actually meeting. I might like his intellect/personality from the chats but when meeting there is no physical connection. Its also nicer to get to know the persons interest AFK.

@Aniv Great advice, tx. Will definitely be more clear on the "objectives" :D
 
AniV said:
I've found that the old-fashioned approach to dating (whether online or any other way) works best.

Dating should be reserved for when two people have already gotten to know each other a bit and both agree to pursue a serious relationship with the intention of long-term commitment or marriage.
Any form of social interaction before then should be casual, preferably in group format, and just as friends.

A lot of people these days date each other so they can get to know one another. That's all wrong. You should only start dating AFTER you've gotten to know each other a bit.
So I would say, if your online dates are all just guys looking to get laid, or in a hurry to get physical, then try inviting your "date" to a group event with friends, or to some activity with other people. There are lots of opportunities for social interaction without being alone with a stranger on a first or second or third date. Even if it's a "double-date" - never do the first few dates alone or in a private place.

When it comes to online dating, be very clear about your expectations in this regard in your profile, or up-front. You'll find that simply telling your potential date that you don't do one-night-stands, or you don't get physical unless the relationship is serious or you are looking for a gentleman with old-school values and courtesy will help get rid of the wrong guys and help you to find the right kind of guy.
Click to expand...

I disagree with everything in your post except the last paragraph.

Though, I think anyone thinking dating sites are good for hooking up is an idiot, it's probably not a bad idea to let it be known that hooking up on the first date should not be expected.
 
The guys on those sites are not all looking for bang n' release.
Some of them are genuine, you will be able to tell by getting to know the guy.

I would not consider going on a date unless I had spoken to a girl for a while online first.

Thats just me, I am worried she would kidnap me and sell me to the Dutch.
 
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