I know someone with a drinking problem.

buyeye said:
The first step is showing him that there is a problem, an intervention of sorts where you tell him what problems the drinking is causing and how much you willing to tolerate what you will not . And stick the decisions you make.
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This stage is done, I think.
 
McSack said:
The AA is a very good option for Wilbur if he has finally decided to admit he has a problem. I have a friend of a friend of a friend ... let's just call her Sheila ... who was putting away a bottle of Absolut before lunch every day. After a couple of attempts at rehab (in spite of her sickness Sheila still managed to keep a pretty successful business running somehow so she could afford the "holiday option") she finally decided to be honest with herself and go to the AA. She swears it's the only thing that worked for her and still goes to a meeting once a week (to start off with Sheila reckons she had to go to meeting every day , just to stay sane)

For someone who has never been to one of these meetings, trust me they can be very fsking wierd the first few times. People really are expected to stand up and introduce themselves " hello my name is Sheila and I'm an alchoholic" . All the admitting of problems and support from everyone else who is there seems really, really cheesy ... but somehow it works
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I'll tell Wilbur what Sheila said, it sounds good.
 
Kicking an addiction is insanely hard to do alone.
The first step towards getting sober/clean is to admit and accept that it will require asking for and accepting help from others.
Even AA involves getting help from others. You don't go to AA and talk to a machine. You speak to other people. Other people who help you and support you and guide you in achieving sobriety.

Find your nearest AA chapter and go. Also, AA isn't just for alcoholics. It's for anybody affected by alcoholism whether friend or family of an alcoholic, even if said alcoholic doesn't attend. AA provides support and encouragement and guidance to non-alcoholics in how to deal with having friends and family who are alcoholics. Even if "Wilbur" doesn't want to go, you can still attend and learn a bit more about how to help "Wilbur".
 
copacetic said:
Impossible for a variety of reasons, the chief being financial, and the fact we'd have to knock this person out, cuff them drive them there in the boot of a car.
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Then you will need a court order to have him committed to a rehab or a psychiatric hospital.

copacetic said:
Eastern Cape. That sounds hectic.
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It is the same as the pills you drink if you want to stop smoking and if you smoke they make you feel sick. Behavioural enforcement with feeling good as reward vs feeling like shlt as punishment.

Also the implant is with his full consent as he knows he has a problem.

Ninja'd said:
The f***
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http://www.soberliving.com/blog/antabuse-disulfuram-implants-a-plausible-treatment-aid

http://mybroadband.co.za/vb/showthread.php/161225-Anti-Booze-Implants

:D
 
AniV said:
Kicking an addiction is insanely hard to do alone.
The first step towards getting sober/clean is to admit and accept that it will require asking for and accepting help from others.
Even AA involves getting help from others. You don't go to AA and talk to a machine. You speak to other people. Other people who help you and support you and guide you in achieving sobriety.

Find your nearest AA chapter and go. Also, AA isn't just for alcoholics. It's for anybody affected by alcoholism whether friend or family of an alcoholic, even if said alcoholic doesn't attend. AA provides support and encouragement and guidance to non-alcoholics in how to deal with having friends and family who are alcoholics. Even if "Wilbur" doesn't want to go, you can still attend and learn a bit more about how to help "Wilbur".
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Sounds good. I think I may go check out a meeting myself, see what it's like. Something tells me Wilbur will be unlikely to attend himself, but I reckon it would be good for me as well, get some pointers.
 
Devill said:
Then you will need a court order to have him committed to a rehab or a psychiatric hospital.

It is the same as the pills you drink if you want to stop smoking and if you smoke they make you feel sick. Behavioural enforcement with feeling good as reward vs feeling like shlt as punishment.

Also the implant is with his full consent as he knows he has a problem.

http://www.soberliving.com/blog/antabuse-disulfuram-implants-a-plausible-treatment-aid

http://mybroadband.co.za/vb/showthread.php/161225-Anti-Booze-Implants

:D
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The problem is not so big it would necessitate committing the dude. The bottom line is they have finally admitted they have a problem, and I want to be able to help how I can. Tying to commit them will not be a good method, I can assure you.
 
My mom was the same, then one day, her nose started to bleed and wouldn't stop, she went to hospital, DR's told her that the nose bleed is a result of many things 'wrong' with her and if she didn't stop drinking, she'd kill herself.

She's stopped, but still steals a 'dop' here and there.
 
copacetic said:
Let's say I have friend of a friend of a friend of a friend who has a drinking problem.

This person, let's call him Wilbur, drinks alone on occasion, often drinks purely to get pissed and recently got into a vehicle after drinking far too much.

I know Wilbur wants to stop, but they've said to me that they can't, even though they've been trying to do so for years.

He is looking for some kind of support group, but is unsure whether AA will be able to help, or quite possibly that they are like a cult or something.

Anyone have any advice for Wilbur?

Thanks.

Copa.
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AA is not a cult (well according to my understanding of a cult) but because each AA group is self run there is quite a variety in terms of how helpful the group is. Also, they don't have a huge success rate.
My advice would be to try AA meetings for a few weeks, that is the only way he will know if they will be helpful to him or not. If he is serious about committing to changing his drinking habits he can do it with or without AA. Research has shown that most alcoholics who recover do so so without following any program whatsoever. If he is an athiest though he will not take to AA very easily
 
joelus said:
AA is not a cult (well according to my understanding of a cult) but because each AA group is self run there is quite a variety in terms of how helpful the group is. Also, they don't have a huge success rate.
My advice would be to try AA meetings for a few weeks, that is the only way he will know if they will be helpful to him or not. If he is serious about committing to changing his drinking habits he can do it with or without AA. Research has shown that most alcoholics who recover do so so without following any program whatsoever. If he is an athiest though he will not take to AA very easily
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Yes, atheist. Worth a try one way or the other. I'm quite curious myself now, will definitely go to a couple of meetings.
 
gdiza said:
My mom was the same, then one day, her nose started to bleed and wouldn't stop, she went to hospital, DR's told her that the nose bleed is a result of many things 'wrong' with her and if she didn't stop drinking, she'd kill herself.

She's stopped, but still steals a 'dop' here and there.
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Glad she stopped.
 
copacetic said:
The problem is not so big it would necessitate committing the dude. The bottom line is they have finally admitted they have a problem, and I want to be able to help how I can. Tying to commit them will not be a good method, I can assure you.
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ok, so to prove he wants to get better, let him prove it by getting the implant :)

Problems = simple solutions are the best.
 
Wilbur != Copacetic ???

As you know I used to be an alcoholic but the avenue I've taken to cure me, as you know, will not be the one for Wilbur.

However, I did go to the AA in Durbanville at one stage for about 2 weeks before I dropped out. I must say as an alternative you should consider them. It's called a "support group" for a reason. There Wilbur will be able to speak to ppl he can associate with, maybe not all but at least some. The "buddy system" they put you on acts like a lifeline and is fantastic.
 
Ekstasis said:
Wilbur != Copacetic ???
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Wilbur != Copacetic, correct. Although, I'd like to stop drinking myself actually. Alcohol is no good for depression, it's probably in the interests of my continued mental health to cease and desist.

As you know I used to be an alcoholic but the avenue I've taken to cure me, as you know, will not be the one for Wilbur.
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No it won't be, but I can agree that it can be a highly successful method.

However, I did go to the AA in Durbanville at one stage for about 2 weeks before I dropped out. I must say as an alternative you should consider them. It's called a "support group" for a reason. There Wilbur will be able to speak to ppl he can associate with, maybe not all but at least some. The "buddy system" they put you on acts like a lifeline and is fantastic.
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Yeah, I'm liking the sound of this aspect to it.
 
So how many days have you been sober? And what made you realise you had a problem?
 
copacetic said:
I'll keep it in mind. :D
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Haha, yes yes I know it sounds monsterous but the thing is that tough love works better than "kitten-mittens".

Get some pictures of people that show what alcohol can do to you.

Maybe even take him to go meet a family that has lost a child / parent / whatever due to drunk driving.

Also maybe take him to Polsmoor and show him where he could end up (killing someone while under the influence / DUI / etc etc).

But before doing any of that maybe have a nice sit down with him and see if he is not already willing to try and change.

copacetic said:
Wilbur != Copacetic, correct. Although, I'd like to stop drinking myself actually. Alcohol is no good for depression, it's probably in the interests of my continued mental health to cease and desist.
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You are 100% correct, alcohol is terrible for people that suffer fom depression. Although for "normal" people two units of whiskey / wine / some other drinks is beneficial to physical health.
 
copacetic said:
Impossible for a variety of reasons, the chief being financial, and the fact we'd have to knock this person out, cuff them drive them there in the boot of a car.
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Ah sorry then I misunderstood, I thought you said the person was looking for help.

Yeah those rehad centers are not cheap sadly :(

Devill said:
A friend of mine's uncle has a drinking problem and he is getting medical implants that make you very sick if you do drink at all.

What province is he in?
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I think its called "the block". An in law down the line is a herion addict and had the block put in which makes the person violently ill if they take the drug.
 
Does your friend perhaps have an underlying problem that causes him to drink ? From my experience that I had with a friend- this person had an extremely traumatic experience , and it did not really affect him at the time...but after about 5 years he started drinking very heavily. No amount of talking to him would help. The only way your friend is going to quit is if he decides to himself. You can drag him to AA and to rehab, but if he is not committed to quitting, he won't. The only reason my friend quit was because he woke up all alone in his car at 3am with no idea where he was or how he got there. Been sober 3 years now.
 
AA is possibly a good option for some, but is based on the premise that Wilbur accepts that he is incapable of helping himself and will have to rely on a 'Higher Power' to rid himself of the demon drink. This 'Higher Power' predictably resolves into 'God'. This premise doesn't sit well with atheists for obvious reasons.

Have look here for a good alternative: https://rational.org/index.php?id=1
 
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