Kissing on first date?

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Skitter

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So there’s this girl who lives literally a few houses down from me. I’ve been into her for quite a while and on past occasions she was always in a relationship (one of those girls that holds a boyfriend for a long time) so I was unable to make my move. But I’m patient. About a week ago I saw on her Facebook page that she’d just broken up with her current BF. I wasted no time in getting chatting to her through FB and asked her out for coffee.

Other than seeing her occasionally when I got a lift from college with her mom, I’ve never really had any significant contact with her before now. We met Sunday evening and it went really well – better than I would’ve expected. We talked about the usual random ****. School, uni, jobs, movies, weekend activities blah blah. I’m a pretty shy guy and usually find myself with awkward silences during theses things, but I’d popped a few anti-anxiety pills before I left and after a few minutes I was totally chilled and we ‘clicked’ pretty well.

I got a lift home with her in her car and told her I really enjoyed it and we should get together and go clubbing or something next weekend or something, and she said yeah we should. We said goodbye and I think I made it pretty obvious how I felt, and don’t think I’m wrong in thinking it was mutual. This friend of mine told me I should’ve kissed her.

I’m pretty incompetent at 'reading' these situations, but is it the norm for two people relatively new to each other to kiss on a first date? Everyone I've asked says I should've. I won’t say I wouldn’t have liked too, and I thought about it, but then I didn't want to get slapped either :p

It seems like one of those things that go without saying, and I feel like a total ****er for not doing it. What is you guys' take on this?

/facepalm
 
Oh god no.................................................................................................
 
Skitter said:
So there’s this girl who lives literally a few houses down from me. I’ve been into her for quite a while and on past occasions she was always in a relationship (one of those girls that holds a boyfriend for a long time) so I was unable to make my move. But I’m patient. About a week ago I saw on her Facebook page that she’d just broken up with her current BF. I wasted no time in getting chatting to her through FB and asked her out for coffee.

Other than seeing her occasionally when I got a lift from college with her mom, I’ve never really had any significant contact with her before now. We met Sunday evening and it went really well – better than I would’ve expected. We talked about the usual random ****. School, uni, jobs, movies, weekend activities blah blah. I’m a pretty shy guy and usually find myself with awkward silences during theses things, but I’d popped a few anti-anxiety pills before I left and after a few minutes I was totally chilled and we ‘clicked’ pretty well.

I got a lift home with her in her car and told her I really enjoyed it and we should get together and go clubbing or something next weekend or something, and she said yeah we should. We said goodbye and I think I made it pretty obvious how I felt, and don’t think I’m wrong in thinking it was mutual. This friend of mine told me I should’ve kissed her.

I’m pretty incompetent at 'reading' these situations, but is it the norm for two people relatively new to each other to kiss on a first date? Everyone I've asked says I should've. I won’t say I wouldn’t have liked too, and I thought about it, but then I didn't want to get slapped either :p

It seems like one of those things that go without saying, and I feel like a total ****er for not doing it. What is you guys' take on this?

/facepalm
Click to expand...

You did the right thing. If you had kissed her there and then, sure maybe you would have gotten a kiss, but immediately you would have gone into the "this is just a random hookup" zone. Let her first feel comfortable around you, learn all aspects of your lifestyle. If she is still around, then your moment will come.

She is also still ripe from the breakup, so this will add to the "random hookup" zone.

Also, had you kissed her then, you would have f**ked up your chances and gambled on a 50/50 chance she slaps you and never wants to see you again, or you get kissed back. Do you want to gamble or be sure of your investment? :D
 
Voicy said:
Congratulations, you're now an intellectual wh0re. aka her gay best friend.
Click to expand...
True, and here's another one:
Osiris85 said:
You did the right thing. If you had kissed her there and then, sure maybe you would have gotten a kiss, but immediately you would have gone into the "this is just a random hookup" zone. Let her first feel comfortable around you, learn all aspects of your lifestyle. If she is still around, then your moment will come.

She is also still ripe from the breakup, so this will add to the "random hookup" zone.

Also, had you kissed her then, you would have f**ked up your chances and gambled on a 50/50 chance she slaps you and never wants to see you again, or you get kissed back. Do you want to gamble or be sure of your investment? :D
Click to expand...
:D

I'm surprised at how many people spend time analysing this s**t. You either grow a pair and make a move, or listen to her moan about the guys she goes out with.
 
Osiris85 said:
Also, had you kissed her then, you would have f**ked up your chances and gambled on a 50/50 chance she slaps you and never wants to see you again, or you get kissed back. Do you want to gamble or be sure of your investment? :D
Click to expand...

Much safer to kiss her on 2nd or 3rd date. You may get away with it on the 1st, but you could also blow the whole thing.
 
Isn't there a forum especially for pre-teens and young teenagers out there so that we don't have to read stuff like this?
 
Jip, and dude now on the second date also don't kiss her and on the third date either, and pretty soon you will be her best friend, isn't that just super :D
 
BobsLawnService said:
Isn't there a forum especially for pre-teens and young teenagers out there so that we don't have to read stuff like this?
Click to expand...

Oh, don't be such a fuddy-duddy, didn't you go through this a few years ago ?

As a teenager it's often a major strategic decision about just when to make a move. Come to think of it, it still is !
 
Osiris85 said:
You did the right thing. :D
Click to expand...

From a woman's point of view : I agree ... if it was me and I felt the same way about you then I would be disappointed at first, but then I'll think about it and actually have more respect for the fact that you didn't try your luck eventhough I wanted you to. It would make me think twice about your character and integrity and that would be what I wanted in a man .... yes I know, we're complicated!
 
Pre teen? Lmao.

I'll therefore assume that it is the norm. Well; god willing I'll hook up with her again on the weekend and make my move then. In the meantime; enjoy the thread :D
 
Jola said:
Oh, don't be such a fuddy-duddy, didn't you go through this a few years ago ?

As a teenager it's often a major strategic decision about just when to make a move. Come to think of it, it still is !
Click to expand...

I'm married. Nevermind first move. It's a constant state of deadlock.

But Yeah, if people think there is value in this sort of discussion I'll bite my tongue.
 
I think this you guys are a bunch of morons for insulting him about not kissing her.

Did you completely miss the part where he took anti-anxiety meds for a date? Surely that is much more worthy of ridicule?
 
Hey think about it this way, what if she gets hit by a truck tomorrow, then you will never get the chance to kiss her! You only live once so just take the chance, odds are she will like you confidence. And of course it's 50/50 that she will slap you, however if you don't try, it's 50/50 that you might land in the friend corner... it's a pretty sucky corner buddy!
 
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