Online affairs

slayerza said:
After reading through this thread, it seems that the concensus that this sort of behaviour is akin to cheating. Someone mentioned that this thread was started based on a hidden feeling of quilt, and that hits much closer to home than expected. I suppose sometime one's little inner voice needs to be trusted without too much questioning.

I do however need to clarify something (and I do realise that this will change the OP somewhat) but anyway... The allure of this activity is not so much sexual, sure, as I say the conversions have lead down that path a few times, BUT mainly it is the satisfaction derived from the "out of bounds" nature of the interaction. This obviously cannot be normal? Surely only criminal get an adrenaline rush from doing the wrong things?
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Talk to your wife. The two of you need help. Together.
 
slayerza said:
After reading through this thread, it seems that the concensus that this sort of behaviour is akin to cheating. Someone mentioned that this thread was started based on a hidden feeling of quilt, and that hits much closer to home than expected. I suppose sometime one's little inner voice needs to be trusted without too much questioning.

I do however need to clarify something (and I do realise that this will change the OP somewhat) but anyway... The allure of this activity is not so much sexual, sure, as I say the conversions have lead down that path a few times, BUT mainly it is the satisfaction derived from the "out of bounds" nature of the interaction. This obviously cannot be normal? Surely only criminal get an adrenaline rush from doing the wrong things?
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I really do get that. its the thrill of the chase, the catch means nothing. but the problem is you start questioning if you can get away with it. next thing you know you are married, have two side chicks and you are still going after more.

other than the getting married, I was there. again the solution is not to quit cold turkey or something silly like that the solution is to speak to your wife openly about it.
let her in on the entire conversation. (preferably the other party should know she is reading everything)

you let the wife help you draw the line, when she gets uncomfortable its gone too far. you then simply stop with that person and move on to the next. keeping your wife happy, and hopefully not letting it get to that point.

but again, this will require you to actually talk to your wife about this. open and honestly. weirdly enough show her this thread.
 
You are suppose to be married to you wife, not just "physically" but emotional as well!

So yes you are cheating on her! And deep down you KNOW it!!!

Why do you hide it from her if you don't consider it cheating! Tell her about all the "chatting" and what you chat about. Then you will see that you are cheating!

Doesn't matter if you think it is cheating or not! It is what she thinks!
 
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Your life, your choices. Keep in mind your choices have consequences, consequences that directly impact your wife's life. Is it fair on her to have no say in the matter about a choice that affects her? What you are doing amounts to Machiavellian behaviour.

Take the advice of the other posters here, and talk to your wife. It will be a very uncomfortable conversation, but you owe it to her to make an informed decision about the choices you make that affect her.
 
slayerza said:
After reading through this thread, it seems that the concensus that this sort of behaviour is akin to cheating. Someone mentioned that this thread was started based on a hidden feeling of quilt, and that hits much closer to home than expected. I suppose sometime one's little inner voice needs to be trusted without too much questioning.

I do however need to clarify something (and I do realise that this will change the OP somewhat) but anyway... The allure of this activity is not so much sexual, sure, as I say the conversions have lead down that path a few times, BUT mainly it is the satisfaction derived from the "out of bounds" nature of the interaction. This obviously cannot be normal? Surely only criminal get an adrenaline rush from doing the wrong things?
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It just seems like you get a thrill out of doing the "forbidden". You should ask yourself if your wife were aware of your chats and had no problem with it, whether you would still get a thrill out of doing it.
 
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Yeah I just reckon that if you have to hide something from someone you care about to avoid hurting them, you should already have realised that you're doing something wrong. Also, everyone's Mrs was once just their "friend", too.

Nip it in the bud.
 
The Voice said:
Yeah I just reckon that if you have to hide something from someone you care about to avoid hurting them, you should already have realised that you're doing something wrong. Also, everyone's Mrs was once just their "friend", too.

Nip it in the bud.
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Best post here
 
If i found out my man was doing this, he would be in the dog box. It might not be a physical affair no but its still cheating
 
Deadmanza said:
Never ends at just chatting. I hope your wife bones the postman when you are not at home.
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SAPO actually delivering the mail will be the real miracle here. I'm sure a lot of people are at the point where they'd bone the postman IF he ever does come around
 
halfmoonforever said:
SAPO actually delivering the mail will be the real miracle here. I'm sure a lot of people are at the point where they'd bone the postman IF he ever does come around
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haha! Post of the week.
*looks at my SAPO tracking number update for the 15th time today*
 
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