Relationship help thread...

b_crazy said:
How many times has your heart been broken by a liar, cheater or such? This seems intensely personal, or not just based on your "friend".
Click to expand...

Yes I do have personal stuff I don't wanna talk about that have shaped who I am today. I have actually been lied to by two men, but my heart wasn't involved so it was no big deal for me.
 
Random Hero said:
OP responding to the thread that was taken over by femnazis and misogynist..

So me and the girl spoke again a bit later.. I sent a funny picture of a cat... she sent me this:

View attachment 190271

And the I laughed and said but its the one I get excited about talking to that counts.

then she sent this picture:

View attachment 190273

So I guess she is cooling off and can laugh at some this now and take humour...

is this a good sign?
Click to expand...

Definitely a good sign. There's hope for your relationship.
 
Random Hero said:
OP responding to the thread that was taken over by femnazis and misogynist..

So me and the girl spoke again a bit later.. I sent a funny picture of a cat... she sent me this:

View attachment 190271

And the I laughed and said but its the one I get excited about talking to that counts.

then she sent this picture:

View attachment 190273

So I guess she is cooling off and can laugh at some this now and take humour...

is this a good sign?
Click to expand...

I don't know if you lump me in with the misogynists, but I assure you, I am not one.

They are good signs and she is keen - as we already knew.

Anyway, do what you want. My take on it is that she said jump and you jumped. Now she knows how easy it is to control you.
 
Sounds promising. Seal the deal with a captioned picture of your junk.
 
Ancalagon said:
I don't know if you lump me in with the misogynists, but I assure you, I am not one.

They are good signs and she is keen - as we already knew.

Anyway, do what you want. My take on it is that she said jump and you jumped. Now she knows how easy it is to control you.
Click to expand...

SaoirseB said:
Definitely a good sign. There's hope for your relationship.
Click to expand...

Thank you for contributing and to everyone else in this thread.. No I don't think I will allow her to control me, i see myself as an alpha male. I'm quite steadfast and can stand my ground.. I will put her in her place.
 
Random Hero said:
I will put her in her place.
Click to expand...
*facepalm* Why, Random Hero, why???

Right up until that comment I was giving you the benefit of the doubt, but now I'm thinking this girl might be right about you.

WHY did you ever think it's cool to 'put somebody in their place', especially when it's a woman who is justifiably concerned about committing to somebody who has a sketchy chat history with multiple women?
 
SaoirseB said:
Yes I do have personal stuff I don't wanna talk about that have shaped who I am today. I have actually been lied to by two men, but my heart wasn't involved so it was no big deal for me.
Click to expand...

Well you're from Vredenburg. No wonder you don't like men. Have you seen the guys there?
 
Random Hero said:
oh FFS!!! Can we get back to my OP? solving the original dilemma please?

Me and the girl spoke a bit just after 12.. She told me she got into trouble and that one of the persons at her Res made a complaint against her because a guy had slept over. then we just had small talk for a bit. told her I'm going to gym..

is this a good sign?
Click to expand...

So prior to this post you have 5 pages of advice, ignore all of it and want someone to tell you what you want to hear?
she made contact with you I suppose and not the other time round. If that is the case ignore what happened and move on the 2 of you. If you initiated the contact, you're ****ed and no one can help you now.
 
SaoirseB said:
I'm sure there must be women out there like that, but it's not the majority. Most women want to just cuddle and not necessarily have sex.
Click to expand...

Which areas do you hang out in? I want to steer well away. I have never met a woman who doesntt want sex, in some cases more than men, but we're all the same in that department.
 
Foxhound5366 said:
*facepalm* Why, Random Hero, why???

Right up until that comment I was giving you the benefit of the doubt, but now I'm thinking this girl might be right about you.

WHY did you ever think it's cool to 'put somebody in their place', especially when it's a woman who is justifiably concerned about committing to somebody who has a sketchy chat history with multiple women?
Click to expand...

no i meant that i would not allow her to walk over me..
 
Something doesn't add up here...

You said:
So Saturday morning after reading the msgs on my phone she gets upset and wants me to take her home
Click to expand...

Then something about some man in her dorm. I suppose that guy wasn't you? :o
 
Random Hero said:
no i meant that i would not allow her to walk over me..
Click to expand...

Dude, if you can't say what you mean online, when you actually type it and have a second to look over it before posting, when will you?

I think you DID mean it, because you're still getting it all wrong. If you thought she was cheating on you, or even likely to, you'd feel that you're allowed to confront her about this ... without her thinking you're trying to 'walk all over her', right? The same applies for you: you need to step back, listen to her concerns, and address them.

If you're trying to go into a relationship with your fists up and ready to defend yourself, you're going to get hurt as well as her. The hardest thing to do in a relationship is to make yourself vulnerable when you really feel like attacking instead.
 
Foxhound5366 said:
Dude, if you can't say what you mean online, when you actually type it and have a second to look over it before posting, when will you?

I think you DID mean it, because you're still getting it all wrong. If you thought she was cheating on you, or even likely to, you'd feel that you're allowed to confront her about this ... without her thinking you're trying to 'walk all over her', right? The same applies for you: you need to step back, listen to her concerns, and address them.

If you're trying to go into a relationship with your fists up and ready to defend yourself, you're going to get hurt as well as her. The hardest thing to do in a relationship is to make yourself vulnerable when you really feel like attacking instead.
Click to expand...

What a crock of shyte...

If you want to meet someone who completes you and you loves her for her and she loves you for you. Then you need to be yourself 100%. Say things like it is if need be, that is who you are. If you need to try and change to impress a girl, she is not for you and it will not last. Simple as that. Even if 99% of the world thinks you're a dick, there is a girl out there that will like you for being a dick. Simple as that.
 
Pitbull said:
What a crock of shyte...

If you want to meet someone who completes you and you loves her for her and she loves you for you. Then you need to be yourself 100%. Say things like it is if need be, that is who you are. If you need to try and change to impress a girl, she is not for you and it will not last. Simple as that. Even if 99% of the world thinks you're a dick, there is a girl out there that will like you for being a dick. Simple as that.
Click to expand...

Lol Pitbull, so tell me ... did that philosophy get you a wife, or are you currently with a girlfriend who loves you for being a dick? I mean, those are your words, not mine.

Look at it this way: people are hugely complex spinning atoms. Bring two atoms into close proximity, and their electrons will start overlapping and smashing into each other, unleashing all sorts of chemical hell.

Now, through conversation, compromise and sometimes good old fashioned 'looking at things through the other person's point of view', we can get off our personal high horses and stop asking what's good for ourselves as individuals, and what's good for BOTH OF US. That's what a a healthy relationship is: it's two people living together, not two people living individually, but in close proximity to each other.

Then again, maybe you prefer the latter kind of relationship, and the best of luck to you.
 
Foxhound5366 said:
Lol Pitbull, so tell me ... did that philosophy get you a wife, or are you currently with a girlfriend who loves you for being a dick? I mean, those are your words, not mine.

Look at it this way: people are hugely complex spinning atoms. Bring two atoms into close proximity, and their electrons will start overlapping and smashing into each other, unleashing all sorts of chemical hell.

Now, through conversation, compromise and sometimes good old fashioned 'looking at things through the other person's point of view', we can get off our personal high horses and stop asking what's good for ourselves as individuals, and what's good for BOTH OF US. That's what a a healthy relationship is: it's two people living together, not two people living individually, but in close proximity to each other.

Then again, maybe you prefer the latter kind of relationship, and the best of luck to you.
Click to expand...

Happily married for 9 years, been together now for 13. the reason people tend to marry and then get a diverse later on is because they try to change who they are to find the girl they think they want. I have had many many many women and I too have changed to be a this idea of a woman and so on. The moment you are not true to yourself you deceive the other person as well as yourself. In the end someone always gets hurt. Be yourself and you will find someone who likes you for being you. Be that a Mamma's boy, a dick, a swinger what ever. There is a saying in Afrikaans: "elke pot het sy deksel" Sure you can make a woman fit you, but why only to not be happy later on and other way round. Apart from women being more emotional than men, there is nothing different when it comes to the inner working of being human. Men and women are the same in all aspects. Women have spent centuries trying to convince men they are different and have different needs... This is just not true. They feel love just like you do. They look for certain traits in men just like we don in women. They also have an yearning to copulate even more so than men btw. As soon as Men realize Women and men are the same, the sooner you will all be happier in life.

If he is true to himself and acts and live his life he wants to, he will find someone who shares a similar view on life. What do you guys think people mean when they say: "she's amazing, we have so much in common" You think it's the fact that they both like to play bridge? :D
 
Foxhound5366 said:
*facepalm* Why, Random Hero, why???

Right up until that comment I was giving you the benefit of the doubt, but now I'm thinking this girl might be right about you.

WHY did you ever think it's cool to 'put somebody in their place', especially when it's a woman who is justifiably concerned about committing to somebody who has a sketchy chat history with multiple women?
Click to expand...

A sketchy chat history:confused::confused::confused:
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top
Sign up to the MyBroadband newsletter
X