Asking the parents...

Both my FIL and I were a bit tipsy when I accidentally let it slip. His words?

"Rather the devil I know" :p
 
I don't know what the deal is with this old-fashioned "asking the parents" setup. I didn't ask and yes, her parents were quite irritated but 9 years on, of their 3 children of which the other 2 were asked permission for, she is the only one still happily married...

Tradition means nothing if it doesn't mean anything to you or your GF.
 
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killadoob said:
Hmmm lol you got me caught in two minds here :p
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Well, the point is rather get into their good books early on, like when you start dating early on. Go home, introduce yourself, and slowly start making yourself a part of their furniture over time. Then they won't be so petty later on.
 
lol i might need this advice soon >.<
 
What happens if she's like 40 and it's her second marriage, do you still ask the parents?
 
I also asked my wife's parents before marrying her. Was really stressed before and during, but soon relaxed since her dad was nice and chill about it.

If her parents like you, you shouldn't have a problem. They'll probably be glad :)
 
Thanks for the good replies guys, I'm quite old fashioned and do see that I have to ask her parents they are also quite old fashioned and traditional! If I ask them and they say no,which I doubt they would say, I would tell my girlfriend! that would open a can of whoopass!
But her parents are quite cool and like me alot
 
You should know by now if they like you and would say yes, if not then your mrs prob wouldn't care if you didn't ask.

I asked and it was really nerve wrecking but worth it afterwards. A mate of mine didn't ask and he now feels like an idiot as the old man doesn't have much time for him anymore.

Best option is to ask him if you can meet him for a beer as there is something you want to talk about. Gives him a chance to think about it too.
 
jacodebeer said:
Thanks for the good replies guys, I'm quite old fashioned and do see that I have to ask her parents they are also quite old fashioned and traditional! If I ask them and they say no,which I doubt they would say, I would tell my girlfriend! that would open a can of whoopass!
But her parents are quite cool and like me alot
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If they say no it could be for other reasons. Not that they don't like you.
 
Well, my daughter (32) had been going out with this guy for 10 years so we just assumed that he would indeed pop the question. It just came out when he was here, he stepped into the kitchen said, "P and I were thinking of getting hitched, is that ok with you" and of course I said yes, only with pleasure. It was easy as that. Of course I know the guy quite well, we have all been on holiday together both here and overseas.

I presume you have made your intentions quite clear to your girl-friend? And she is as keen as you are?
 
I phoned the dad up and asked if I could quickly come see him at his work. I then took him some biltong as a peace offering and told him I loved his daughter and that I want to spend the rest of my life with her, and that I want to ask her to marry me and that I'd feel honored if he would give his blessing.

It went pretty well and he gave me some advice on being married and what it means to be a husband.

Surprisingly, my dad was a bit upset that I didn't come speak to him.
 
Surely your parents must have known that you had a serious relationship on the go? It wasn't a sudden thing, was it?
 
I didn't have to ask. Things reached the point where he sat down at the piano every time he visited and played the wedding March
 
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