Do you have friends?

I have a small group of "friends", even smaller group of true friends. I dont easily call someone a true friend though. Out of my group of friends...one guy has sooo many "friends"...but ja...he is a bit deluded...cos they not really true friends. Guess I trying to say...a lot of people have friends...but realistically...they are not "friends" in the true sense of the word. More like "people they know a bit and see every now and again"...
 
xrapidx said:
If you're happy, do you really need friends?

I'm constantly busy - don't even have 30minutes to myself - so I only see friends once or twice a year.
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I would really die if that was the case in my life.

I love spending time with friends, IMO its what makes life worth living.
 
Garyvdh said:
The same would apply to a person who decides to give up drinking. He is not likely to hang around with his friends at the pub anymore.
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Yep. I got bored with drinking and partying somewhere in the last couple of years and sorta drifted away from most of my friends.
 
Mila said:
While on holiday i did a lot of thinking. I am a sad loser with no fiends:(
I like to tell myself it is because i moved around so much and just never do the BFF thing.

Where do you get these things other people call friends?

And does this mean i'm a really irritating anoying loser nobody wants to be friends with?

And how do i start to change my nasty friend off putting habits?
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Hmmm mila, are you the kind of person who goes out alot? If your not you won't have many friends. Maybe your just not good with whole friendship thing :). Your not a loser for having no friends, your b/f is a friend surely :).

Yup geri me as well dude, all i do is play poker once a week with them and skip the drinking/braai/club story as i am 28 now and in all honesty sick of braai's and sick of clubs.
 
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killadoob said:
Hmmm mila, are you the kind of person who goes out alot? If your not you won't have many friends. Maybe your just not good with whole friendship thing :). Your not a loser for having no friends, your b/f is a friend surely :).

Yup geri me as well dude, all i do not is play poker once a week with them and skip the drinking/braai/club story as i am 28 now and in all honesty sick of braai's and sick of clubs.
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Savage! You are not allowed to get tired of braaiing!:mad:
 
Church is a good way, but not the only way! There are thousands of clubs and sports facilities out there. I would stay away from bars and clubs though, not because I have a bias against them, but because they are not as likely to produce the right kind of nurturing friendships a person needs. Mila mentioned pottery. That is a good start. Get involved in a club, or take some lessons.

When you go into those situations make a concerted effort to be a listener and to spread smiles. A wise person once told me that the best friend is not one who gets, but who gives. Go out of your way to make others happy and to make them smile. You will soon find yourself enjoying life tremendously.

The same is true of a marriage relationship. If you are in a rut, then try your best to make the other partner happy and to meet their needs. You will soon find that you are a much happier person for it.
 
LOLZ!!! @ Devil. I worked in clubs and pubs but now i'm a office bunny like the responsible peeps. I would love to go clubbing and things but have no one to do it with.
BF and me work together. I need some people to have girly nights and things. It does not help to live in D00$burg. I mean really!! I know i'm a snob but i'm used to PTA east :(
 
Gary i love the saying:

Nice guys finish last. Being a good friend is not all about going out of your way to please and make people happy. Nothing wrong with meeting people in a pub either, some of the most awesome people i know today i met in clubs while on all sorts of narcotics. You cannot pick your friends like you do a packet of chips.

JHB is better than PTA and the only way to find friends mila is to go out. Go out to pubs and grab some drinks, it's really not that bad :). Does it bug you though that you have no friends?
 
Mila said:
LOLZ!!! @ Devil. I worked in clubs and pubs but now i'm a office bunny like the responsible peeps. I would love to go clubbing and things but have no one to do it with.
BF and me work together. I need some people to have girly nights and things. It does not help to live in D00$burg. I mean really!! I know i'm a snob but i'm used to PTA east :(
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Lol, so thats a yes on the gauteng mybb meet?
 
Garyvdh said:
Church is a good way, but not the only way! There are thousands of clubs and sports facilities out there. I would stay away from bars and clubs though, not because I have a bias against them, but because they are not as likely to produce the right kind of nurturing friendships a person needs. Mila mentioned pottery. That is a good start. Get involved in a club, or take some lessons.

When you go into those situations make a concerted effort to be a listener and to spread smiles. A wise person once told me that the best friend is not one who gets, but who gives. Go out of your way to make others happy and to make them smile. You will soon find yourself enjoying life tremendously.

The same is true of a marriage relationship. If you are in a rut, then try your best to make the other partner happy and to meet their needs. You will soon find that you are a much happier person for it.
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+1
 
Devill said:
I would really die if that was the case in my life.

I love spending time with friends, IMO its what makes life worth living.
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Nah - I have my girlfriend - she's my friend - and I see her all the time.

Other than that - I'm happy seeing other friends once or twice for a big get together....
 
Mila said:
Nope. But people do not like that either. I also like men better than woman. I do not do the group in the kitchen complaining about my BF. I like the car sport and general talk men do better. But That makes woman think i want in their BF's pants. :D
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Mila, it sounds like you're the same kind of person as me :)
 
So, why don't we organise an impromptu meet for almal here thats keen
 
Oh my mother told me to never give out any info on the interwebz.....
 
Most people aren't worth knowing to be honest. I find that people in general are pretty two faced and self serving, so I have a hand full of close friends and the rest I just mingle with when I have to. Making new friends in a work place can be difficult, especially if most of the people you work with are older or younger than you are. In my work environment most of the people are 35 or older. Seeing as I'm 26 and kind of weird, I don't really hang out with them per se.
 
blunomore said:
"He who travels alone, travels faster."
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well said.

And She who travels alone, takes the wrong offramp to the airport, and gets stuck with a flat tire somewhere in the outer reaches of bloemfontein.
 
killadoob said:
Gary i love the saying:

Nice guys finish last. Being a good friend is not all about going out of your way to please and make people happy. Nothing wrong with meeting people in a pub either, some of the most awesome people i know today i met in clubs while on all sorts of narcotics. You cannot pick your friends like you do a packet of chips.
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Dear miss Mila,

Killa is right. I only have frequent contact with 2 of my "friends" from school. The rest of my closest friends I've made while working in a pub during varsity (tech) days.

If you're an attractive girl, as I'm sure you are, you'll maybe not notice that you already DO have friends - but never realized it.

Think back at which guys were polite to you, helped you carry stuff, offer their assistance with random things, etc. It's a sad reality that girls (even guys in a similar situation) only notice the people THEY want to be friends with, and more often than not don't even give the people who want to be friends with THEM the time of day.

Not every guy wants to score you. I've been the nice guy for way too long to people who simply do not even take notice of it or couldn't be bothered to greet me back. I then asked myself why on earth I'd want to be around someone who does not want to be around ME.

I read a nice saying today that may explain what I meant:

Anyone can be polite to a king, but it takes a great man to be polite to a beggar.
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