Do you have friends?

hmmm.. take two people(two because the conversation could get a bit awkward with him and you alone) and go to an IPL game.. Simple as "howzit, thinking about going to the IPL this weekend, want to join?" If he says no, then so what, its not worse than getting rejected by a girl you know what I mean? Take your friends to places you like to go, you will be in your place of comfort which will make conversation easier.. :)
 
feo said:
I also have a fear of failure and felt that hanging out with friends would bugger up my prospects for the rest of my life so I made the "smart" choice and studied instead.
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I know exactly what you mean, but somehow I keep putting my studies behind my social life. It really sucks to get bad marks for important tests/pracs.
 
Mila said:
While on holiday i did a lot of thinking. I am a sad loser with no fiends:(
I like to tell myself it is because i moved around so much and just never do the BFF thing.

Where do you get these things other people call friends?

And does this mean i'm a really irritating anoying loser nobody wants to be friends with?

And how do i start to change my nasty friend off putting habits?
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how many time do i have to say this.."no i dont want you as a friend":D
And on a seriaazzz note i dont really have friends,they all just use me and thats honest.No friend will call me to say hi or lets go do the friday..etc,they will only call me for help or to fix something....but come to think of it i only have 1 friend and craig you are that buddy and yes you can marry my sister:cool:
 
if by friends you mean the ones that visit and you go out with, then i have no friends.
 
Garyvdh said:
90% of my friends I know through my church. ok, it is a failry large church, but...

I don't know how people survive without a church family. If one of us gets sick or we need help with the kids, we have ten families we can call on in a heartbeat... in fact we don't even have to call them, they are beating down our door to help.

When my wife was in hospital for a week last month, we had cooked meals every night and people to watch the kids for us.

We get together frequently for socials, braais, dinners, etc.

Those people are my friends.

Go to a good church Mila... make some useful friends.
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Excellent. I also went for a couple of years in my mid twenties without friends except for one that I only saw for 3 weeks, twice a year.

But know through the church I now have many decent and classy friends and we meet up every Thursday evening.

Forget about your religious orientation for a moment and consider the fact that your chances of meeting good people is much higher in a church community than anywhere else.
 
In SA... here where I am currently... none to speak of (some that I will on occasion go out with/watch a movie, but very occasionally)... I have a few friends (so called "closer friends") in a few cities in SA, but due to global financial constraints, it's very difficult for me to go visit them.

In my hometown (overseas) where I studied however... :D lots of acquaintances, closer friends and a small group that does braais and the like regularly. Can't wait to finish up here and go back.

@feo - I personally think friends>work during varsity. A social life doesnt need to kill your studying and the only reason I still have two years left to go is because my parents couldn't afford it. I'll finish when I go back. Having said that - I could have forgone the whole massive social scene (ADD-student type, never at home, constant road trips etc) and gotten a scholarship and finished yonks ago... but the people I have met along the way are worth it and personally... it didn't hamper me much. Never failed, fell a little behind from time to time, but that's where prioritizing your time comes to play. Remember, the people you meet in university are the connections that will be most useful to you throughout your life. That and your first boss (if s/he's not a dumbass on the way out ;))

--

Also, I don't see why people distinguish between offline and online friends. It's like a different social circle. I have group of buddies who like DnD, comics and the like and group who like pubbing, going to cafes and sitting around town loafing. Online friends are just a different social circle in my opinion...
 
dablakmark8 said:
how many time do i have to say this.."no i dont want you as a friend":D
And on a seriaazzz note i dont really have friends,they all just use me and thats honest.No friend will call me to say hi or lets go do the friday..etc,they will only call me for help or to fix something....but come to think of it i only have 1 friend and craig you are that buddy and yes you can marry my sister:cool:
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Yea too many friendships are onesided and draining... Having friendships and maintaining them requires work just like your job but harder in my opinion. Its not always easy to be unselfish, thoughtful and open up and drop your guard and risk getting hurt but it is very rewarding in friendships. In school and varsity its difficult to find REAL friends coz everyone is always looking for the next party or good time and going out in groups where they feel like they belong but actually very few of those people would be there for you in really tough times. In that time of my life I thought I had loads of friends but there is a difference between party buddies/drinking buddies and real friends who actually care about whatsup in your life. So I think its normal to have less friends as you get older. Now these days with much fewer friends I have much better friendships. I socialise with many people but only about 7/8 I would call real friends and those are the ones I choose to work on. But that said if you only have one really close friend that is all you really need. As long as someone is there for you in hard times and to celebrate with you through the good times.
 
smokey said:
Also, I don't see why people distinguish between offline and online friends. It's like a different social circle. I have group of buddies who like DnD, comics and the like and group who like pubbing, going to cafes and sitting around town loafing. Online friends are just a different social circle in my opinion...
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QFT.

I have pondered about statements and engaged in discussions between online friends just as much an amount of time that with that of friends in the flesh.
 
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Sensorei said:
Yea too many friendships are onesided and draining... Having friendships and maintaining them requires work just like your job but harder in my opinion. Its not always easy to be unselfish, thoughtful and open up and drop your guard and risk getting hurt but it is very rewarding in friendships. In school and varsity its difficult to find REAL friends coz everyone is always looking for the next party or good time and going out in groups where they feel like they belong but actually very few of those people would be there for you in really tough times. In that time of my life I thought I had loads of friends but there is a difference between party buddies/drinking buddies and real friends who actually care about whatsup in your life. So I think its normal to have less friends as you get older. Now these days with much fewer friends I have much better friendships. I socialise with many people but only about 7/8 I would call real friends and those are the ones I choose to work on. But that said if you only have one really close friend that is all you really need. As long as someone is there for you in hard times and to celebrate with you through the good times.
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man that the gayest **** i ever heard...just kidding.I Do have a female friend thats my soulmate but she's not a guy so what type of friend is she then:D
 
dablakmark8 said:
man that the gayest **** i ever heard...just kidding.I Do have a female friend thats my soulmate but she's not a guy so what type of friend is she then:D
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Doesn't have to be a guy (or girl, if you're a girl) IMO.
 
Well a women friend gets a bit to emotional to some extent.Besides having female as a best friend will get you in hot water with any women you dating imho
 
dablakmark8 said:
man that the gayest **** i ever heard...just kidding.I Do have a female friend thats my soulmate but she's not a guy so what type of friend is she then:D
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To quote a famous african-american comic:

"You're just a d*ck in a jar"
 
How do you guys feel about your partners having a lot of male friends?

Personally it would freak me out badly :p
 
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