How's Tinder these days?

[Scary_Turtle]

This.

Dating apps are a feel good mechanism. It's just an ego boost.

Rather meet people in places with shared interests.

Where do you find these people with the same interest. If you like sitting and watching series how do you find Mrs right?

When you do find someone at a braai etc the chances of them having something in common with you is small. Inet dating bridges the gap.

 

[backstreetboy]

Why not?

Don't be stupid about it of course. Look for the ring, look for the boyfriend/partner and look for kids/family (unless you're okay with that).

She's busy shopping? Approach and ask. Just don't corner them (they hate that). Let them have an 'out' to escape and move away.

Be kind. Be pleasant and just talk.

Yeah no thanks. You'll get #metoo'd.

 

[Scary_Turtle]

When you intentions are right on internet dating, I don't see how any of these "negatives" apply.

 

[r4nd0m]

Have you tried it?

Running the numbers is better on online dating, you have access to far more people. The people want to talk to you not like a person in checkers who is buying toilet paper and they can do it from the comfort of their couch.

Good looking people will do better in any situation real life or online dating but I have a friend who isn't good looking, socially awkward and found a lovely gf on the app. Do you think the 1-5/10 are hooking up with the 10/10 guys.

Yes, I've tried it. I'm actually disabled, so I walk with a crutch. You'd think it'd be a downer, but they ask "what happened to you?". It starts a conversation.

I suppose it also implies I'm less capable of harm, which gives women comfort. This is important. Make them feel comfortable. You do that by being confident in yourself and not caring about the outcome.

They're human beings just like you. If they tell you to get lost, then get lost. If they keep talking to you, then good for you. Keep it going and keep her interested.

Have fun with it. Try and get her number. Be direct, see where that leads you. Be charming or aloof. See where that goes. Even do it just to practice and talk to women. See if you can get them to ask for your number, etc...

Running the numbers online is great if you're a woman or the small percentage of men that look good in photos.

Yeah no thanks. You'll get #metoo'd.

See it's this sort of fear that prevents you from meeting women you actually want.

Imagine you see 'her' in real life (your perfect 10) and you can actually get to know her immediately and find out whether she is interested, available or a total bitch? It's almost instant.

Society and the media are conditioning you to opt out. Fsck that. Why must you approach from a distance behind a screen?

---

Online, only so much can be conveyed. The tone of your voice and how you speak. The way you look, in all 3 dimensions. The ability to lead the conversation instead of waiting for replies. It's great to instantly know whether a girl is into you or not. If she rejects you or flakes later, who cares?

You'd rather spend time reading bios, writing [unique and standout] messages to just be ignored? Put all that effort into a person or a series of replies for them to ghost you?

Swipe right on everyone (I think right is accept) to potentially match with 1 girl a week?

Why waste your time and your life? Why settle for women who pick you? Go out there and have at it. Be a gentleman, polite and you'll be fine.

 

[backstreetboy]

Yes, I've tried it. I'm actually disabled, so I walk with a crutch. You'd think it'd be a downer, but they ask "what happened to you?". It starts a conversation.

I suppose it also implies I'm less capable of harm, which gives women comfort. This is important. Make them feel comfortable. You do that by being confident in yourself and not caring about the outcome.

They're human beings just like you. If they tell you to get lost, then get lost. If they keep talking to you, then good for you. Keep it going and keep her interested.

Have fun with it. Try and get her number. Be direct, see where that leads you. Be charming or aloof. See where that goes. Even do it just to practice and talk to women. See if you can get them to ask for your number, etc...

Running the numbers online is great if you're a woman or the small percentage of men that look good in photos.


See it's this sort of fear that prevents you from meeting women you actually want.

Imagine you see 'her' in real life (your perfect 10) and you can actually get to know her immediately and find out whether she is interested, available or a total bitch? It's almost instant.

Society and the media are conditioning you to opt out. Fsck that. Why must you approach from a distance behind a screen?

---

Online, only so much can be conveyed. The tone of your voice and how you speak. The way you look, in all 3 dimensions. The ability to lead the conversation instead of waiting for replies. It's great to instantly know whether a girl is into you or not. If she rejects you or flakes later, who cares?

You'd rather spend time reading bios, writing [unique and standout] messages to just be ignored? Put all that effort into a person or a series of replies for them to ghost you?

Swipe right on everyone (I think right is accept) to potentially match with 1 girl a week?

Why waste your time and your life? Why settle for women who pick you? Go out there and have at it. Be a gentleman, polite and you'll be fine.

Good for you. I'm not disabled and not going to fake a limp like a beggar.

 

[r4nd0m]

Good for you. I'm not disabled and not going to fake a limp like a beggar.

I'm sure we can organize you a broken leg around your parts for a small fee.

But seriously dude, you are fine as you are. Just approach. Even if she's out of your league, go out and bat. There are no losses and every "no" will eventually result in a "yes".

You ever see these hot girls with guys that just don't seem to be on their level of attractiveness? Yet, they are with them. You think they matched online? Seriously? Friends, family or he met her and asked her out.

Talk about your Philips Air Fryer. Talk about Capitec. Just talk nonsense. It's all allowed. Maybe she will laugh, and you'll have chemistry.

 

[Scary_Turtle]

Yes, I've tried it. I'm actually disabled, so I walk with a crutch. You'd think it'd be a downer, but they ask "what happened to you?". It starts a conversation.

I suppose it also implies I'm less capable of harm, which gives women comfort. This is important. Make them feel comfortable. You do that by being confident in yourself and not caring about the outcome.

They're human beings just like you. If they tell you to get lost, then get lost. If they keep talking to you, then good for you. Keep it going and keep her interested.

Have fun with it. Try and get her number. Be direct, see where that leads you. Be charming or aloof. See where that goes. Even do it just to practice and talk to women. See if you can get them to ask for your number, etc...

Running the numbers online is great if you're a woman or the small percentage of men that look good in photos.


See it's this sort of fear that prevents you from meeting women you actually want.

Imagine you see 'her' in real life (your perfect 10) and you can actually get to know her immediately and find out whether she is interested, available or a total bitch? It's almost instant.

Society and the media are conditioning you to opt out. Fsck that. Why must you approach from a distance behind a screen?

---

Online, only so much can be conveyed. The tone of your voice and how you speak. The way you look, in all 3 dimensions. The ability to lead the conversation instead of waiting for replies. It's great to instantly know whether a girl is into you or not. If she rejects you or flakes later, who cares?

You'd rather spend time reading bios, writing [unique and standout] messages to just be ignored? Put all that effort into a person or a series of replies for them to ghost you?

Swipe right on everyone (I think right is accept) to potentially match with 1 girl a week?

Why waste your time and your life? Why settle for women who pick you? Go out there and have at it. Be a gentleman, polite and you'll be fine.

Gosh what a load of nonsense. You make it sound like people are not having these conversations, are scared and insecure which is not the case but I guess congrats you can be yourself like most other people on the planet.

You can charm the pants of a girl with your words and still have nothing in common. Approaching from behind a screen as you say just aligned our interests before meeting.

You do realise that you talk for a day maybe 2 and then meet up.

All the real life stuff you mentioned still happens, they don't pick you, you pick each other. I did manage to find the girl I want and I married her so I'm hoping she found the guy she wanted but considering she said yes I think I'm on the right track.

 

[backstreetboy]

I'm sure we can organize you a broken leg around your parts for a small fee.

But seriously dude, you are fine as you are. Just approach. Even if she's out of your league, go out and bat. There are no losses and every "no" will eventually result in a "yes".

You ever see these hot girls with guys that just don't seem to be on their level of attractiveness? Yet, they are with them. You think they matched online? Seriously? Friends, family or he met her and asked her out.

Talk about your Philips Air Fryer. Talk about Capitec. Just talk nonsense. It's all allowed. Maybe she will laugh, and you'll have chemistry.

That only works in Hallmark / Netflix movies or a Michael Buble music video. If it did in real life then there would be much more marriages and less divorces. With the deregulated sexual marketplace we have now she'll have 10 way hotter guys waiting in line and bat you in a blink of an eye. Friends also only work if you have any. These days people have less friends if any and only care about themselves and surviving. Bars? The people going there are already hooked up. Local get together? Well the person you want to get to know is chatting to 15 other people. Church? Nice then you'll have to join all the activities and devote your life. Dating apps? Ah great people just use it for an ego boost. As soon as you match with someone they unmatch you. Also they don't give you a reason as to the why? Local parkrun / hiking group. Nice you'll meet a fit girl that probably thinks the world is fine just as long as she can run every other day. Probably also don't want you to say anything negative about the world. So yes dating apps is the best thing we've come up with. Until you meet up with someone and she has the audacity to ask you why you're still single?

 

[r4nd0m]

Gosh what a load of nonsense. You make it sound like people are not having these conversations, are scared and insecure which is not the case but I guess congrats you can be yourself like most other people on the planet.

Don't be obtuse. Which people are initiating conversations and which people are replying? Who are they replying to?

Online dating is a sausage fest with women firmly in control. For superficial reasons, she will deny even speaking to you, though you might be very good on paper. That is 100% her right of course.

If you don't think online dating favors women, you are obviously missing something. Yes, they may get a lot of unwanted attention too, but even then, how do you as a man stand out? How do you make yourself known?

Who will stand out in her inbox? The ones who photograph well. That's the primary metric she is using for attraction. They get the conversations. Everyone else is disregarded. However, not every man has looks and not every man photographs well.

Do you enjoy writing messages that women don't ever read? Do you read her bio and go through her photos thinking you two will hit it off, only to have her vaguely glaze at your message similar to all the others she has?

In reality (i.e. the real world), things become equalized. Instant even. "You" are not just another message among the pile of messages in her inbox. You are realized and are [right now]. Everything is laid on the table and the conversation may begin.

You do realise that you talk for a day maybe 2 and then meet up.

So? Happens online to. Meet up and no sparks, then what? Everything is an attempt at establishing a connection. Online is slow, tedious and competitive. Reality is instant if you have balls to just go and talk to them.

All the real life stuff you mentioned still happens, they don't pick you, you pick each other. I did manage to find the girl I want and I married her so I'm hoping she found the guy she wanted but considering she said yes I think I'm on the right track.

Yes, you pick each other. Rather, now I'm not just another message tied to a profile in her inbox among a swathe of other 'contestants'. I've skipped all of them and can get my result (she's interested or not). I've even shown I have the guts to approach.

 

[r4nd0m]

That only works in Hallmark / Netflix movies or a Michael Buble music video. If it did in real life then there would be much more marriages and less divorces. With the deregulated sexual marketplace we have now she'll have 10 way hotter guys waiting in line and bat you in a blink of an eye. Friends also only work if you have any. These days people have less friends if any and only care about themselves and surviving. Bars? The people going there are already hooked up. Local get together? Well the person you want to get to know is chatting to 15 other people. Church? Nice then you'll have to join all the activities and devote your life. Dating apps? Ah great people just use it for an ego boost. As soon as you match with someone they unmatch you. Also they don't give you a reason as to the why? Local parkrun / hiking group. Nice you'll meet a fit girl that probably thinks the world is fine just as long as she can run every other day. Probably also don't want you to say anything negative about the world. So yes dating apps is the best thing we've come up with. Until you meet up with someone and she has the audacity to ask you why you're still single?

You're very negative. It's okay, approaching isn't for everyone.

I've tried the online route, but I was tired of being ignored and my efforts being in vain. Approaching yielded instant results and I got a lot more interest. Like a LOT more.

What got me to be like that? Not caring what people think about me and not basing my worth on the outcome. You will get there eventually.

Guys, honestly, if you aren't a looker or you don't photograph well, just approach. Sell them on your charm, voice, intelligence, humor, wit, etc... (the things you can't manifest instantly online).

It's difficult to put this across, but be a gentleman while also being direct. Honesty is good. Tell her why you came over. She's not some special goddess. You won't be smited down for failing. You can keep trying.

 

[FiestaST]

https://twitter.com/x/status/1592806765191888897

 

[Sensorei]

You ever see these hot girls with guys that just don't seem to be on their level of attractiveness? Yet, they are with them.

Yes those men are usually rich and the women with them for the financial security and perks. Super hot women don't date ugly, chubby men with average bank accounts unless they have very low self esteem.

 

[Scary_Turtle]

Don't be obtuse. Which people are initiating conversations and which people are replying? Who are they replying to?

No idea but I never had a problem so maybe I'm super attractive which I am not.

Online dating is a sausage fest with women firmly in control. For superficial reasons, she will deny even speaking to you, though you might be very good on paper. That is 100% her right of course.

So you both swipe on each other in private but she denies it? This makes no sense and does nothing to strengthen you case because she will deny talking to you in real life to.

If you don't think online dating favors women, you are obviously missing something. Yes, they may get a lot of unwanted attention too, but even then, how do you as a man stand out? How do you make yourself known?

Dating favours Women end of story but I would rather talk to someone who is actively seeking than harass them in checkers because you "want them". Like WTF is the egotistical "I like her going knock over head and take home" prehistoric bs

Who will stand out in her inbox? The ones who photograph well. That's the primary metric she is using for attraction. They get the conversations. Everyone else is disregarded. However, not every man has looks and not every man photographs well.

This is exactly what you are doing she looks good let me go and harass her, then if she rejects you you move on.
Just because you forced yourself into her space doesn't mean you have a better shot.

Do you enjoy writing messages that women don't ever read? Do you read her bio and go through her photos thinking you two will hit it off, only to have her vaguely glaze at your message similar to all the others she has?

No do you enjoy speaking to women who dismiss you, even though you have picked her and thought she is a 10?

In reality (i.e. the real world), things become equalized. Instant even. "You" are not just another message among the pile of messages in her inbox. You are realized and are [right now]. Everything is laid on the table and the conversation may begin.

So by forcing yourself into her space, irritating her after work when she is tired and just wants to buy her lamb chops at woolies, you now have a better shot?

So? Happens online to. Meet up and no sparks, then what? Everything is an attempt at establishing a connection. Online is slow, tedious and competitive. Reality is instant if you have balls to just go and talk to them.

This is your opinion, again you are implying that men don't have balls but you do.

Yes, you pick each other. Rather, now I'm not just another message tied to a profile in her inbox among a swathe of other 'contestants'. I've skipped all of them and can get my result (she's interested or not). I've even shown I have the guts to approach.

So when you said "Why settle for women who pick you" you were being dishonest?
Haha and she is going home thinking I hope I don't run into that chap at woolies because that is going to be awkward but at least you got guts.

How many successful relationships or even dates have you had on your crusade of talking to the women you want whenever you want to?

Do you think anyone owes you anything because you spoke to them in public?

 

[ShaunSA]

wtf is wrong with you guys?

Meet chicks whichever way you want. There's no right or wrong way ffs

 

[Tabac]

wtf is wrong with you guys?

Meet chicks whichever way you want. There's no right or wrong way ffs

When are you meeting a chick ?

 

[ShaunSA]

When are you meeting a dick ?

Tomorrow actually

 

[Tabac]

Tomorrow actually

You're bisexual now ?

 

[ShaunSA]

You're bisexual now ?

My vok jy's a dom ****

 

[Tabac]

My vok eks 'n nat naai

I see what you did there

 

[r4nd0m]

<long rant>

Wow, your post is full of righteous indignation. Sorry to offend you ma'am.

Look, stop pedestalizing women. I didn't mention anything about harassing them or you being entitled to them. If they tell you to buzz off, then buzz off.

Use online dating or approach - whatever works best for you.

Just a question, how did people meet before online dating?

Yes those men are usually rich and the women with them for the financial security and perks. Super hot women don't date ugly, chubby men with average bank accounts unless they have very low self esteem.

Don't worry about them and what they have. Go and get yours. Or don't and sit on the sidelines being negative. Up to you. In general, you should try to be the best version of yourself, so make sure you're doing that.

Meet chicks whichever way you want. There's no right or wrong way ffs

Agreed.