New(ish) and future parents tips/tricks thread

me_ said:
Dads: Be prepared for the toughest conversation of your life with an illogical, overtired mother who doesn't want to believe her baby is starving and when the realisation sinks in...
Click to expand...

^ this
 
Ooh my sort of thread now! My first tip - test different diaper brands. We swore by Pampers as everyone else did, but found out that (at least at the Number 1 size), Huggies Gold works, well, better. It absorbs quicker and more than the Pampers, and seems to seal better around out little one's legs. So yay!

PS I ordered a crapload of Pampers before we discovered this :D
 
Early on, we met a lady that told us about a "magic baby hold". It's got a few different names, but I've been able to find some pictures:
https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/1407/3324/files/football-hold_1000px_grande.jpg
https://www.littlebrown.co.uk/Piatkus/babycalm-by-sarah-ockwell-smith-sneak-peek.page

It works really well to squeeze winds out of babies. Every night, I would walk around the house holding our baby like this and after a few minutes, he would expel all his winds and fall asleep.

Another benefit is I found it comfortable to do this one handed and more importantly on my left arm so I had my right arm free to do anything else.
 
Toxxyc said:
Ooh my sort of thread now! My first tip - test different diaper brands. We swore by Pampers as everyone else did, but found out that (at least at the Number 1 size), Huggies Gold works, well, better. It absorbs quicker and more than the Pampers, and seems to seal better around out little one's legs. So yay!

PS I ordered a crapload of Pampers before we discovered this :D
Click to expand...
This is before Huggies went with the unisex thing and in the process changed the way they make the nappies or the materials.. they absorb a lot less than they used to and leak so easily when they are full.. we have had the nappies actually tear if you just look at them slightly skew..

They are not as good as they used to be..
 
We didn't have too many issues with our daughter from 0-8months...then the teething started! Holy hell some kids have it easy and some have it bad...guess which side my daughter landed on? Fever, sweating, drooling like crazy, terrible tantrums, no eating or drinking, super acidic nappies etc. Just don't make the mistake we did as doctors are expensive! Cold (not ice cold) chewy rubbery toys work wonders, Ashtons and Parsons provides some relief but best is Calpol, especially at night to help them sleep through without pain.

Push through that teething process and don't let the tantrums and lack of sleep get to you. It's tough but you will survive!
 
me_ said:
Early on, we met a lady that told us about a "magic baby hold". It's got a few different names, but I've been able to find some pictures:
https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/1407/3324/files/football-hold_1000px_grande.jpg
https://www.littlebrown.co.uk/Piatkus/babycalm-by-sarah-ockwell-smith-sneak-peek.page

It works really well to squeeze winds out of babies. Every night, I would walk around the house holding our baby like this and after a few minutes, he would expel all his winds and fall asleep.

Another benefit is I found it comfortable to do this one handed and more importantly on my left arm so I had my right arm free to do anything else.
Click to expand...

We had something similar to get winds out. The problem was that our little one has/had reflux, so it would also get some of the milk out. We ended up using Novalac AR Digest (vrek expensive), which works really well. Only problem is that it does get scarce from time to time.

Another thing that worked well were the Tommee Tippee bottles with Variflow teats. These open up as wide as the little can suck. Worked great with the anti-reflux formula, the normal ones seemed to get clogged easily.
 
Tommee Tippee and Nuk worked well for us, others not so much.

Also, be clever about the nappies. Have expensive nice ones for the once a night changing and use cheap ones for the 3 hour changes. You would be amazed how much you can save and still have a clean life.

And get a tube of Bapanthen. Very expensive cream but if your child has severe rash or acid burn, this will resolve it sraight away, just don't use it for every day use, sudocream is fine for that.

Steer away from products that lull you into safety concerns. Our son was in the NICU for 85 days, all we needed was breastmilk, nappies, normal cream , bapanthen cream, plain wetwipes or just good old cotton wool and water. If thats good enough for a NICU, its fine for home.

Keep fever meds on hand, empaped and ponstan. Watch their tempretures, ideally if a high fever, try break with a empaped suppository ( not oral medicine, that comes out quicker than it goes down ) and alternate with ponstan at next dose. If the fever doesn't break and just yo'yo's between temps from the meds, don't be shy about taking your child in, severe temps can cause brain damage and seizures. Also these meds have age limits ie: one set for under 2, between 2 and 5 and then higher.
 
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Mostly useless products based on own experience. My son didn't like any of these.
- ubuntu baba baby carrier
- activity walker - although he liked to fiddle with buttons and thingamajiggies but as a walker - completely useless.
- rocker

Products that worked
- baby feeding chair
- Pampers premium care nappies/diaper pants
- Calpol (very occasionally esp. during teething)
 
me_ said:
My main advise for any new parent is that everything you are about to learn about breastfeeding is complete B.S.
You will be told that breast is best and that it's only the exceptions that require a top up with formula from time to time and that introducing a bottle will cause confusion and babies will not go back onto the breast. The reality is:
- 80 - 90% of moms will need to supplement with formula at some stage - make sure you have a tin in the cupboard
- Introducing a bottle earlier will make switching between breast and bottle easier. Moms that are pure breast till later struggle to get the baby onto bottles.
- If you can't express, the baby's not getting enough - don't believe the B.S. that babies suck differently compared to the machines.
- If baby's not sleeping, try give a bottle of formula before bed - you can make sure they've had a good feed
- If baby's not sleeping through, give them a bottle for a few nights in a row - at least 3 nights to try set in a new routine.

Bottles are great because you can see exactly how much the babies had to drink so you can make sure they have had a decent meal before bed which will lead to longer sleep and dad's can do it too.

Dads: Be prepared for the toughest conversation of your life with an illogical, overtired mother who doesn't want to believe her baby is starving and when the realisation sinks in...
Click to expand...

I've always believed in fed is best, if you're not producing enough milk then formula is fine. But you get the lactation squad who would stubbornly stand by breast is best and if you're like but my wife can't they are like it must be something you're doing wrong.
 
With any baby: when you do that fun thing when you lift them up above your head... do not open your mouth.

With boys: stand to the left or right, rather than directly in line, when changing nappies.

Keep a spare (or 2) nappy in your car for emergencies. They will happen.
 
Is there a thread where we can ask questions as new parents?
 
Fantastic. So, my kid is in NICU. Been stuck there since birth, the 25th. He's not breathing too lekker. X-rays and scans show nothing wrong with his heart or lungs, so the docs say we should just give him time. How much frigging time do I give him? I'm stressed beyond sanity, and I think I'm busy developing an anxiety disorder. It's TERRIFYING. His issue is that his saturation (oxygen in his blood) is low, and isn't picking up like it should. Anyone have any words of encouragement?
 
me_ said:
Dads: Be prepared for the toughest conversation of your life with an illogical, overtired mother who doesn't want to believe her baby is starving and when the realisation sinks in...
Click to expand...

Or you know, be supportive of the breast is the best concept and help in another way wherever you can to see it through completely without any formula ever getting involved.

No need to have the conversation at all if that's the case.

Obviously, if feeding naturally is completely impossible then you don't have any other options...but more often than not that "option" seemingly becomes too readily available.
 
The_MAC said:
My issue is that our bed only has place for me and my wife, the kids can come in the morning, but during the night is very uncomfortable for everyone - it disrupts our sleep.
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Absolutely if it's messing up your own sleep then it's a no go.

I'm a pretty light sleeper and with second kid being less than one we are awake more often that not anyway.

Which is why No.1 is awake in the first place as she gets disturbed by No.2 so I really can't blame her if she comes to us in the middle of the night.

If it's really that uncomfortable then one of us rather just goes and sleeps in her bed so as not to disturb the peace, usually on a rough night of many ups and downs and you really couldn't care where you sleep.

Sometimes just going with the flow is a much better option than trying to enforce what is ultimately really a small thing in the bigger picture.

I have bad nights with my own aches and pains where I actually just prefer going to sleep somewhere else, so maybe I'm a bit weird in this regard.
 
Toxxyc said:
Fantastic. So, my kid is in NICU. Been stuck there since birth, the 25th. He's not breathing too lekker. X-rays and scans show nothing wrong with his heart or lungs, so the docs say we should just give him time. How much frigging time do I give him? I'm stressed beyond sanity, and I think I'm busy developing an anxiety disorder. It's TERRIFYING. His issue is that his saturation (oxygen in his blood) is low, and isn't picking up like it should. Anyone have any words of encouragement?
Click to expand...

NICU is not a fun place - sort of puts your life into perspective... Sorry to hear about your kid. Spend as much time there as you can but remember that this is harder on mom than on dad so be her crutch as well (blindly assuming that you are in fact dad). Most NICU staff are really dedicated and will have your little one's best interest at heart at all times.

I hope that you can one day look back on this and just remember it as a speedbump on your road...
 
me_ said:
My main advise for any new parent is that everything you are about to learn about breastfeeding is complete B.S.
You will be told that breast is best and that it's only the exceptions that require a top up with formula from time to time and that introducing a bottle will cause confusion and babies will not go back onto the breast. The reality is:
- 80 - 90% of moms will need to supplement with formula at some stage - make sure you have a tin in the cupboard
- Introducing a bottle earlier will make switching between breast and bottle easier. Moms that are pure breast till later struggle to get the baby onto bottles.
- If you can't express, the baby's not getting enough - don't believe the B.S. that babies suck differently compared to the machines.
- If baby's not sleeping, try give a bottle of formula before bed - you can make sure they've had a good feed
- If baby's not sleeping through, give them a bottle for a few nights in a row - at least 3 nights to try set in a new routine.

Bottles are great because you can see exactly how much the babies had to drink so you can make sure they have had a decent meal before bed which will lead to longer sleep and dad's can do it too.

Dads: Be prepared for the toughest conversation of your life with an illogical, overtired mother who doesn't want to believe her baby is starving and when the realisation sinks in...
Click to expand...

Yup as I said, the lactation squad will arrive, apparently you shouldn't have told your wife that fed is best but struggled through and possibly caused more issues.
 
Lupus said:
Yup as I said, the lactation squad will arrive, apparently you shouldn't have told your wife that fed is best but struggled through and possibly caused more issues.
Click to expand...

Or struggles through and have no issues at all...

Could really go either way mate.

All I implied was not to cop out too quickly just because you have formula in the cupboard.

Attempt just a little perseverance, and you might never need the formula at all.
 
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