Sexual Fetish Obsession

Kage said:
Ummm...there is another "professional" option you can take.
I am being serious now.
How much of an obsession is this?
Does your partner know?
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what option is that? :)
she does know, and imagine a porn addiction without the porn :p
 
blunomore said:
Viva religion :rolleyes:
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part of me actually becoming an atheist had to do with it, because i grew up praying to God to help stop all the sexual fetish dreams and urges i had, and for most of my teenage years i hated myself for the thoughts i had and that i had to resort to masturbation to just make them go away.

sorry if it's too much information, but i know how religion frowns upon it, and i used to feel extremely guilty about it and that i had nobody else besides God that i could talk to. i used to lie awake at night scared that i was going to become a serial killer or go to hell, or that somebody would find out
 
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smalltownsky said:
what option is that? :)
she does know, and imagine a porn addiction without the porn :p
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A "sexual professional" sir.
I am being serious.

This is how I see it.
You have 2 options:
a) allowing you to practice this fetish
b) denying this fetish

The only thing that you need to know about fetishes is that once you have practiced it, it doesn't go away, like opening Pandora's box so to speak. What you let out you can never put back again.
Denying this fetish will just submerge it further and then there is the possibility of it becoming stronger orit might not.

It depends on how much of an obsession it really is.

Do you feel the need or have the want to practice it in real life?
 
Major props for posting under normal account.

PythonFSi said:
is this like bandwidth throttling?
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Hahaha

smalltownsky said:
i spoke to a professional before, they suggested electro-shock therapy
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:eek::eek::eek: I hope you punched him in the face.

I'd suggest a shrink, but not the one you consulted so far...they sound like incompetent fools. Def should not be prescibing meds for this.

You appear to prefer a DIY solution though so maybe look into the NLP techniques designed to overcome phobias. DJ knows a bit about NLP...probably more than me.

Alternatively you could try hypnosis, but I'd try a shrink first since that would be a cleaner & technically correct solution.

Also, if you go through with Slinky's plan then I'd suggest doing one of those emergency paramed course things first so that you know what to do if the sht hits the fan.
 
Don't worry about it too much, bud. Like BrendonD said, we all have our little kicks and yours isn't that uncommon.

My ex girlfriend, for instance, loves a bit of pain. Every now-and-then she'd bring out her knives or if she was feeling really passionate, she'd bite down really hard on my arm, neck or shoulder. It was really difficult for me to come to terms with the idea in the beginning but eventually, through lots of discussion with her, I began to understand where her urges came from and what it meant to her so I allowed her to indulge herself. She liked having her hair pulled and sometimes she'd request that I bite her back so it wasn't a one-way thing. I never thought of her as "weird" or "creepy". I have a lot of respect for her and this is just something that happens behind closed doors. She's a normal, functioning member of society under any other circumstances, so why should she be ashamed of the things that give her pleasure?

I think you give your wife too little credit. It sounds like she's been very understanding and she's not judging you for your fetish. That's a rare thing. Human beings are programmed to be judgmental of ideas they don't understand or share. There aren't many people out there who would be willing to step out of their own comfort zones to make you happy.

As for trying to "forget" your fetish, don't. As long as it doesn't affect your life in a negative way, what's the problem? It sounds more like you have a guilt issue about the fetish than the actual fetish bothering you...
 
Kage said:
A "sexual professional" sir.
I am being serious.

This is how I see it.
You have 2 options:
a) allowing you to practice this fetish
b) denying this fetish

The only thing that you need to know about fetishes is that once you have practiced it, it doesn't go away, like opening Pandora's box so to speak. What you let out you can never put back again.
Denying this fetish will just submerge it further and then there is the possibility of it becoming stronger orit might not.

It depends on how much of an obsession it really is.

Do you feel the need or have the want to practice it in real life?
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it genuinely didn't know that, i mean i read about them in MensHealth and online but i didn't think it was actually a profession that could help with sexual fetishism. i'll google some, thanks for that :)

i have practiced it in real life, but i've felt guilty about it. i want to do it more too. my wife let's me so somethings with her, but i don't hurt her, it's more pretend because i really don't want to hurt her.
 
Kage said:
A "sexual professional" sir.
I am being serious.

This is how I see it.
You have 2 options:
a) allowing you to practice this fetish
b) denying this fetish

The only thing that you need to know about fetishes is that once you have practiced it, it doesn't go away, like opening Pandora's box so to speak. What you let out you can never put back again.
Denying this fetish will just submerge it further and then there is the possibility of it becoming stronger orit might not.

It depends on how much of an obsession it really is.

Do you feel the need or have the want to practice it in real life?
Click to expand...

Uhm... No.

I've had a specific fetish for as long as I can remember. Way before I ever actually indulged it. It was as strong then as it is now. Fetishes are not things that ever go away. The need to practice it may diminish and you can usually control yourself but that doesn't mean it's not still there.
 
HavocXphere said:
Major props for posting under normal account.


Hahaha


:eek::eek::eek: I hope you punched him in the face.

I'd suggest a shrink, but not the one you consulted so far...they sound like incompetent fools. Def should not be prescibing meds for this.

You appear to prefer a DIY solution though so maybe look into the NLP techniques designed to overcome phobias. DJ knows a bit about NLP...probably more than me.

Alternatively you could try hypnosis, but I'd try a shrink first since that would be a cleaner & technically correct solution.

Also, if you go through with Slinky's plan then I'd suggest doing one of those emergency paramed course things first so that you know what to do if the sht hits the fan.
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thank you :)

i'd prefer anything right now, and thank you for all yoru suggestions. i've heard of hypnosise before but i didn't know how reliable or real it was :) thanks for all the tips :)
 
smalltownsky said:
it genuinely didn't know that, i mean i read about them in MensHealth and online but i didn't think it was actually a profession that could help with sexual fetishism. i'll google some, thanks for that :)

i have practiced it in real life, but i've felt guilty about it. i want to do it more too. my wife let's me so somethings with her, but i don't hurt her, it's more pretend because i really don't want to hurt her.
Click to expand...

As I mentioned earlier, it seems like it's more the guilt of having the fetish than actually having the fetish that bothers you.

Fetishes in general evoke a sense of guilt in us because it's something that most people don't share with us. That makes us feel like outcasts, in a way. I think that's where the guilt comes from. First step is to make peace with yourself and the fact that you have this fetish. The guilt fuels the fetish and if you diminish the fuel, you will diminish the desires as well. Try it.
 
I believe that we all have fetishes of some form or the other.
I do not believe that fetishes will go away either and only through the acceptance of the fetish will you be able to control it.
Acceptance does not equate to practice though.
 
blunomore said:
You sound like a member of the Catholic church in the Middle Ages :)

Everything they could not explain or did not approve of, automatically came from 'the devil'.
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So what was that procedure they banned where they punched a hole in you head?

They believed they could cure mental illness with that!
 
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