The Friend Zone

[Mike Hoxbig]

the chick sucked my soul!

You're doing it wrong.

 

[Nick333]

I'm not currently in a "friend-zone" situation. I'm just curious in general, what the signs would be. The more subtle ones. Since I over analyze I've started looking at behaviour and not what people say and "reading" into it.

I'd rather base my findings on does he call/text me more than normal. Does he go out of his way to see me etc. From what male friends have told me, when a guy likes you...you'll know it. They are pretty straight forward with feelings and make it known. But what I'd like to know what about the shy ones..would they be straight forward in their actions as well?

...getting a bit OT

I wouldn't take what your guy friends tell you too seriously. They're just ignoring the fact that some guys are shy and a lot are just dense about women. What your average guy says about how guys are is really just how they think guys should be.

 

[murraybiscuit]

You're doing it wrong.

well, at least that clarifies where the soul resides...

 

[_Hecate_]

Me personally I can't be friends with a girl and not have some form of attraction, unless she is a literally a mountain troll, the thing is tho I might not act on it cos I enjoy the friendship and don't need more from her.

Helg I think you hit on truth here. We pick our friends based on something the other person has that attracts us, if its the opposite sex , you are straight and you have nobody else grabbing your attention...sooner or later that friend is gonna start looking VERY attractive.

 

[I.am.Sam]

I'm not currently in a "friend-zone" situation. I'm just curious in general, what the signs would be. The more subtle ones. Since I over analyze I've started looking at behaviour and not what people say and "reading" into it.

I'd rather base my findings on does he call/text me more than normal. Does he go out of his way to see me etc. From what male friends have told me, when a guy likes you...you'll know it. They are pretty straight forward with feelings and make it known. But what I'd like to know what about the shy ones..would they be straight forward in their actions as well?

...getting a bit OT

a shy one wont tell you but he will show you ..the calls and the going out of the way to see you would make it obviuos ...until one day if you tell him you met someone that may be the only time he would say what he feels

Me personally I can't be friends with a girl and not have some form of attraction, unless she is a literally a mountain troll, the thing is tho I might not act on it cos I enjoy the friendship and don't need more from her.

theres a big difference in finding your way in teh friendzone and being a friend

if you meet someone you know your intentions ...but if just meeting someone at campus at work ...that becomes your friend

someone you meet ..when you want to meet that someone can then put you in the friendzone

 

[_Hecate_]

I wouldn't take what your guy friends tell you too seriously. They're just ignoring the fact that some guys are shy and a lot are just dense about women. What your average guy says about how guys are is really just how they think guys should be.

Screwed either way then. Guess if you feel the guy is worth it in the end put your heart on the line and see what happens. Better to know than to wonder what if...

 

[Helghast]

So the consensus here is that if he's your friend and hasnt tried to sleep with you he doesnt find you attractive and it has nothing to do with the "friend zone"?

Nah as I said I will find her attractive, but I won't make a move cos I couldn't be bothered, if she however made a move, no guy will say no, unless they find her unattractive or are in a relationship (and are serious about it).

 

[Helghast]

LOL yes clear straight forwardness if you are just looking for sex. But if you want something long term this is not the way to start it, imo.

Telling someone you like them (dating-wise) too early can creep the other person out. [crazeeyyy eyes]

Don't think so, being bold is a sign of confidence.

 

[Helghast]

a shy one wont tell you but he will show you ..the calls and the going out of the way to see you would make it obviuos ...until one day if you tell him you met someone that may be the only time he would say what he feels



theres a big difference in finding your way in teh friendzone and being a friend

if you meet someone you know your intentions ...but if just meeting someone at campus at work ...that becomes your friend

someone you meet when you want to meet someone can then put you in the friendzone

You know you can be friends past work right?
Huh?

 

[I.am.Sam]

You know you can be friends past work right?
Huh?

yes but im saying that they are more a friend ..unless you want more and go with that intention

lol if you meet someone ...that you want to meet ..that girl can then put you in a friendzone as well

 

[Xmailer9]

Nope, the mistake guys make is that they try and build comfort too quickly before creating the necessary attraction. That's what lands them in the friend zone. You don't need to be attractive to create attraction, but you do need to creation attraction before building comfort.

pardon me, but what does this mean ? :erm:

 

[VioletF]

Just to clarify: The original post refers to the situation where the other person already knows how you feel, but isn't interested, regardless of the reason (since most people won't say it's because they aren't attracted to you, they'll rather try to be diplomatic and say something like "I don't want to risk the friendship" or some similar BS).

 

[I.am.Sam]

Just to clarify: The original post refers to the situation where the other person already knows how you feel, but isn't interested, regardless of the reason (since most people won't say it's because they aren't attracted to you, they'll rather try to be diplomatic and say something like "I don't want to risk the friendship" or some similar BS).

then im sorry theres nothing that can change that

 

[Randux]

Just to clarify: The original post refers to the situation where the other person already knows how you feel, but isn't interested, regardless of the reason (since most people won't say it's because they aren't attracted to you, they'll rather try to be diplomatic and say something like "I don't want to risk the friendship" or some similar BS)

It was 2010 I was told to wait for 2012 lol so you never win in such situations, best you forget and stay clear of her/him.

 

[azbob]

Just to clarify: The original post refers to the situation where the other person already knows how you feel, but isn't interested, regardless of the reason (since most people won't say it's because they aren't attracted to you, they'll rather try to be diplomatic and say something like "I don't want to risk the friendship" or some similar BS).

In those situations it's best to remove yourself completely because as long as the person is in your life it makes it that much harder to get over them.

Also, how many times do you try. If you get turned down once, is that it? Or do you try again? How many times is the limit before realizing it will never happen?

 

[tsume]

You're right of course I just mean that's how it ends up.

Didn't recognise you there, Mystery. What happened to your poofy hat, bangles and eyeshadow?

That guy is a tosser, but he's right about that Many others have said it too.

Reading the book the first time I was like wow...I then watched a video of his and the guy was too much.

I think David Wygant offers good and excellent advice, but it's really up to the individual how to decided on approaching and entering a relationship. For example I was watching SimplePickUp and those guys are just monsters with day game, even though they do state they get turned down a lot, personally that's not for me but the conversation are always with noting down.
I just take bits and pieces and install my personality as well.

 

[Helghast]

pardon me, but what does this mean ? :erm:

Basically what many guys do is try get the girl comfortable and like them for who they are, that is what puts you in the friend-zone, after that they try to get closer and more intimate, but you already in the friend zone so it won't work.
Get closer and intimate first, make her like you but also be attracted in you.

 

[tsume]

Basically what many guys do is try get the girl comfortable and like them for who they are, that is what puts you in the friend-zone, after that they try to get closer and more intimate, but you already in the friend zone so it won't work.
Get closer and intimate first, make her like you but also be attracted in you.

Simplified by Captain Hindsight

 

[Xmailer9]

Basically what many guys do is try get the girl comfortable and like them for who they are, that is what puts you in the friend-zone, after that they try to get closer and more intimate, but you already in the friend zone so it won't work.
Get closer and intimate first, make her like you but also be attracted in you.

thanks

 

[Maddmatt]

Better to know than to wonder what if...

So true. Just do it, there is no other option that wont leave you regretting it in the future.