Weed advice

iaywtimnbe said:
No. You can get pissed again and again without being dependent on alcohol... usually just out of stupidity. Many people do this one weekend after the next for little to no reason.
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As someone who has many alcoholics in the family tree, and have battled with alcohol myself, I'd venture that anyone getting pissed every weekend qualifies for some level of dependency.

Substance dependence, commonly called drug addiction, is a compulsive need to use drugs in order to function normally. When such substances are unobtainable, the user suffers from withdrawal.[1]
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Substance_dependence

In the case of people who get pissed every weekend, I think it's relatively safe to say that they are using alcohol to 'function' in a given social environment. As for the withdrawal aspect, let's assume someone who regularly does this is on a temporary medication which precludes them from drinking - Their level of bitching about this situation should make their cravings clear.
 
noxibox said:
No doubt you'd pat yourself on the back thinking that they'd definitely comply. Looking back at my teenage years I can only laugh uproariously at your advice (as we laughed at the hard-line parents who thought they had their children under control).


Yes, they have been for the last 100,000 years or so. We're definitely doomed and the world must be about to end any minute....
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Your argument is superficial. If you deem it necessary to derogate from your parental responsibility in this situation be my guest. One could argue with a cornucopia of superficial reasons - at the end-of-the-day it's my house and my rules, respect that and we have an understanding, try your luck - which teens do - then face the consequences of your decisions - simple. As a parent, my duties are to care, love, nurture and teach etc - allowing criminal behaviour and to sanction a mind altering substance for my 16 year old daughter at a critical cognitive development phase, to me, would be an egregious violation of my parental duties. Sugar-coat it however you wish to, it remains superficial - the underlying issues remain. When her 'cognitive-gate' shuts and she blossoms into adulthood, then her decisions in life are hers – my part is done in the comfort of knowing I tried my best.
 
copacetic said:
As someone who has many alcoholics in the family tree, and have battled with alcohol myself, I'd venture that anyone getting pissed every weekend qualifies for some level of dependency.



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Substance_dependence

In the case of people who get pissed every weekend, I think it's relatively safe to say that they are using alcohol to 'function' in a given social environment. As for the withdrawal aspect, let's assume someone who regularly does this is on a temporary medication which precludes them from drinking - Their level of bitching about this situation should make their cravings clear.
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I have no doubt that some people are dependent. Believe me, I'm quite sure I'd be hooked in shorter time than most, knowing my own experience with caffiene.

When we know more about genetics, it might be easier to identify people prone to these issues... and it would be good to know if you're one instead of learning the hard way.
 
I will add my comments on this, Bit of a long story though.

My parents were the extremely strict kind. I was not allowed to sleep out at friends "because I had my own bed". They were not allowed to sleep over by me "because they had their own bed". I was not allowed out to movies until the age of 17 and even then I was very close to 18. I was always mocked by my dad and he never allowed me to touch alcohol or never even mentioned weed, just basically said If he ever found it or caught me doing it there would be big issues. I being totally **** scared of him never did do anything BUT this was never good once I reached 18, I often got beaten with fists and all the rest even just for silly things never mind touching what he said I couldn't.

The day I hit 18, I went out to drink and got so wasted I couldn't walk really but had a friend and we got mugged on the way home, luckily my dad was in Joburg and not in durban at the time.

Eventually I moved to joburg and landed up trying weed when I went to a friend for a while and I was staying with my grandma at times and other times my aunt and uncle. Once I tried it, i liked it so much that I continued to use it, eventually it became a daily occurance and then became a several times a day occurance. My parents moved up to joburg and i moved back in with them but now that I was over 18 my dad didnt have much of a say as to what I did. I was working and didnt really care what he said anymore. One day i went to a friend and he found my banky in my draw and I told him to **** himself he cant do anything about it, only thing he said was either you leave my house or you do it away from home or he will call the cops which is what I did. I left and never really spoke to him again. I still used it up until October this year. That was for 8 years that I had been smoking weed. I however am still successful at what I am doing. I bought my own car without my parents help. I now have just bought my second car and moved overseas, now earning the equivalent of R25 000. I was earning enough money to survive albeit it was tough on the money I was earning and I was studying while smoking several times a day. I managed to get several qualifications and now I am in a position where by things are much much better off for me.

My mom tried to talk to me about it many many times, And I refused to listen to her or to stop unless she was willing to give it a try and see where I am coming from.

TL : DR - At 16 my parents were extremely strict and I do not believe this was the best route. I would have done better with parents that taught me better and knew better about the substance than to go the route they did as it only had worse implications once I got to 18 and decided to go my own way. most parents dont think their kids will leave because we rely on them and I struggled alot but I pushed through it while smoking to prove them wrong. I stopped in October by choice and because where I am it is not as easy to come by and because I am not under the same pressures in life and wanted a complete life change and that is what has happened. Think carefully about how you would approach this because I do not know the way forward, I just know it is fully possible to become successful while smoking and I have never felt any negative effects from it, but then again i wasnt 16 and smoking, i was 18.
 
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Yeah... that is extreme. Seems more out of insecurity than anything else.
 
The biggest single problem is not the weed itself, but the friends that come with it, that could lead you down the wrong path.
The silly things you can get up to to get the weed (score) is where the problems start.
Suddenly you start meeting new "friends" and all is very cool and groovey, but watch yourself!
There is always a bad apple in the bunch that might take advantage of your girl.
Personality plays a very big part here and how confident she is in herself.

Making your kid aware of the dangers and letting them know you care for their wellbeing, is about the best you can do.
At this rebel stage, putting one foot wrong could damadge your relationship for a looong loong time, or worse....

Also, a criminal record might sound very cool now, but later in life it can come back and bite you hard!
Ever tried applying for a job with a criminal record?
Ever tried getting a visa with a criminal record?
 
wetkit said:
The biggest single problem is not the weed itself, but the friends that come with it, that could lead you down the wrong path.
The silly things you can get up to to get the weed (score) is where the problems start.
Suddenly you start meeting new "friends" and all is very cool and groovey, but watch yourself!
There is always a bad apple in the bunch that might take advantage of your girl.
Personality plays a very big part here and how confident she is in herself.

Making your kid aware of the dangers and letting them know you care for their wellbeing, is about the best you can do.
At this rebel stage, putting one foot wrong could damadge your relationship for a looong loong time, or worse....

Also, a criminal record might sound very cool now, but later in life it can come back and bite you hard!
Ever tried applying for a job with a criminal record?
Ever tried getting a visa with a criminal record?
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You couldn't have said it any better. Weed in itself is harmless but for kids no. It's illegalities of it that's the problem, and like many posters said before, it impairs cognitive development. I'd educate my child on their growing phase of life and sort out and discuss why she was smoking it. It'll be terrible to find her being taken by a SAPS Isuzu Bakkie and having to appear in Juvenile Court infront of a judge. Make her realize the risks involved, and that its not worth it at this stage IMO.
 
Parents who think being authoritarian, with threats of punishment, is going to stop their child from doing things they'd rather they didn't, keep telling yourself that. You clearly had very sheltered teenage years or are naturally conformist. I laugh because my friends who had the strictest parents, who punished them for rebellion, searched their rooms and spied on them were the most rebellious. They were the ones who always had alcohol and cigarettes, knew drug dealers, owned impressive pornography collections and so on.

As far as cannabis breaking down a barrier that's really a consequence of the war on drugs and its attendant propaganda. Those who campaign against illegal drugs are prone to, and I'm being generous here, being somewhat misinformed. Once a teenager realises that whining ex-junkie or supposed drug expert was full of it on the topic of cannabis they make the leap to assuming everything said was false. As much as they're clueless these anti-drug types do sometimes say something that isn't pure unadultered tripe. That can be a problem if the child has not already been taught to rather get their drug information from a reliable source.

copacetic said:
In the case of people who get pissed every weekend, I think it's relatively safe to say that they are using alcohol to 'function' in a given social environment. As for the withdrawal aspect, let's assume someone who regularly does this is on a temporary medication which precludes them from drinking - Their level of bitching about this situation should make their cravings clear.
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That's a broad assumption. Like saying that someone who goes skydiving every weekend must have a problem. Some of my friends are a royal pain when they can't ride their motorcycles. Some people just really enjoy certain things. Now that much drinking may well be risky, but that's a separate issue (and none of my business).

wetkit said:
The biggest single problem is not the weed itself, but the friends that come with it, that could lead you down the wrong path.
The silly things you can get up to to get the weed (score) is where the problems start.
Suddenly you start meeting new "friends" and all is very cool and groovey, but watch yourself!
There is always a bad apple in the bunch that might take advantage of your girl.
Personality plays a very big part here and how confident she is in herself.

Making your kid aware of the dangers and letting them know you care for their wellbeing, is about the best you can do.
At this rebel stage, putting one foot wrong could damadge your relationship for a looong loong time, or worse....
Click to expand...
The same argument could be made about a lot of things. But in regard to acquisition this is why it is better to make sure they understand the right and wrong way to go about acquiring whatever it is they're after. It is illegal, but not wrong, so anyone who is going to use these drugs needs to exercise due caution.

Ever tried applying for a job with a criminal record?
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Actually it's not nearly the big deal some people are making it out to be, especially for something almost nobody cares about like a little cannabis use. Chances are there will be numerous people amongst their superiors and co-workers who are users. But yes, better that they simply not get caught in the first place. One day maybe these people will no longer be persecuted by the state.

Ever tried getting a visa with a criminal record?
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You can. Depends on the conviction and how long ago it occurred.
 
noxibox said:
That's a broad assumption. Like saying that someone who goes skydiving every weekend must have a problem. Some of my friends are a royal pain when they can't ride their motorcycles. Some people just really enjoy certain things. Now that much drinking may well be risky, but that's a separate issue (and none of my business).
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It was not a judgement, my comment, just a response to the assertion that someone can drink that regularly and that much, without becoming dependant, as definined by the mental health definitions we use (as far as I can tell, this is unlikely).
 
Didn't really read through the thread, but we used a product called Weeds by Kombat - quite cheap at builders. Mix it with water and spray on the weeds, they wither and die quite satisfyingly.

Never mind - caught sight of post above mine, different kind of weed.. Apologies.
 
copacetic said:
As someone who has many alcoholics in the family tree, and have battled with alcohol myself, I'd venture that anyone getting pissed every weekend qualifies for some level of dependency.



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Substance_dependence

In the case of people who get pissed every weekend, I think it's relatively safe to say that they are using alcohol to 'function' in a given social environment. As for the withdrawal aspect, let's assume someone who regularly does this is on a temporary medication which precludes them from drinking - Their level of bitching about this situation should make their cravings clear.
Click to expand...

I have 2 friends who were recently taken up as alcoholics. It started with getting pissed weekend after weekend, afterwards it goes to week after week. I often feel so out of place at a party of club, because I do not waste my money on cheap drugs.

These guys can't socialize without a bottle of brandy.
 
noxibox said:
Parents who think being authoritarian, with threats of punishment, is going to stop their child from doing things they'd rather they didn't, keep telling yourself that. You clearly had very sheltered teenage years or are naturally conformist. I laugh because my friends who had the strictest parents, who punished them for rebellion, searched their rooms and spied on them were the most rebellious. They were the ones who always had alcohol and cigarettes, knew drug dealers, owned impressive pornography collections and so on.
Click to expand...
the biggest joke was that everyone in the neighbourhood knew who these kids were, but their parents somehow were ignorant.

As far as cannabis breaking down a barrier that's really a consequence of the war on drugs and its attendant propaganda. Those who campaign against illegal drugs are prone to, and I'm being generous here, being somewhat misinformed. Once a teenager realises that whining ex-junkie or supposed drug expert was full of it on the topic of cannabis they make the leap to assuming everything said was false. As much as they're clueless these anti-drug types do sometimes say something that isn't pure unadultered tripe. That can be a problem if the child has not already been taught to rather get their drug information from a reliable source.
Click to expand...
Often innocent kids are caught up in this whole saga as well. I had a friend with stricker parents who stored his stash into another friend's computer, it wasn't a bright idea as the parent recognized the smell. We had to do a lot of explaining.
 
m4dh4tt3r said:
I will add my comments on this, Bit of a long story though.
snip
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I have seen this so many times. A few years ago I dated a girl whose parents made sex a taboo in the house, they were not allowed to mention sex, alcohol or drugs of any kind. Who rebelled to badly once she was on her own, it is actually sad to see it.
 
Yep and as with many of these examples, the problem is simply bad parenting... so often parents dont take the time.
 
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