Depression.

[OCP]

Would like to avoid something like this before it happens, but it is getting there.

Family are all trying very hard between the other crisis.

But currently everyone is evil.

I had the same happen with my mother.

She shut everyone out - would not allow me in the house when I went to visit her.

Would answer the phone but would then put down straight away.

Everyone was against her - she was convinced my wife was planning to kill her.

With help of friend I got her assessed by doctor who concluded she was a danger to herself and others (this is after she tried to run someone over with her car).

Due to her volatile and extremely violent nature ended up having to call SAPS to go to her house / breaking open the door and forcefully remove her (took 4 policemen to get her out - she bit one so badly he needed stiches).

After 3 days in hospital for observation she was transferred to Falkenberg (mental hospital in CT) where she was for 8 months.

Even on meds she had to remain in facilities (that were kak expensive) - she was kicked out of 2 due to her violent behavior and ended up in a lock down dementia facility for a few years before she passed.

I ended up going through the high court to legally be appointed to be in charge of her person and finances (2 separate things you shared custody with a lawyer)

She was never completely diagnosed orher than the vascular dementia that developed later on but was treated for "personality disorder"

Personally I think she was paranoid/delusional with uncontrolled anger issues. Even heavy meds made no difference other than to sedate and make her "manageable".

On a side note - my wife was a clinical psychologist so she was able to give me a lot of insight and help me understand some people are just beyond help.

I hope that is not the case here but as has already been suggested get the Dr to make both the assessments and recommendations.

 

[maumau]

I had the same happen with my mother.

She shut everyone out - would not allow me in the house when I went to visit her.

Would answer the phone but would then put down straight away.

Everyone was against her - she was convinced my wife was planning to kill her.

With help of friend I got her assessed by doctor who concluded she was a danger to herself and others (this is after she tried to run someone over with her car).

Due to her volatile and extremely violent nature ended up having to call SAPS to go to her house / breaking open the door and forcefully remove her (took 4 policemen to get her out - she bit one so badly he needed stiches).

After 3 days in hospital for observation she was transferred to Falkenberg (mental hospital in CT) where she was for 8 months.

Even on meds she had to remain in facilities (that were kak expensive) - she was kicked out of 2 due to her violent behavior and ended up in a lock down dementia facility for a few years before she passed.

I ended up going through the high court to legally be appointed to be in charge of her person and finances (2 separate things you shared custody with a lawyer)

She was never completely diagnosed orher than the vascular dementia that developed later on but was treated for "personality disorder"

Personally I think she was paranoid/delusional with uncontrolled anger issues. Even heavy meds made no difference other than to sedate and make her "manageable".

On a side note - my wife was a clinical psychologist so she was able to give me a lot of insight and help me understand some people are just beyond help.

I hope that is not the case here but as has already been suggested get the Dr to make both the assessments and recommendations.

So sad .

Do you have any theories on why this suddenly happened to you mom?

In our case it was years of recreational drug abuse.

 

[RedViking]

I had the same happen with my mother.

She shut everyone out - would not allow me in the house when I went to visit her.

Would answer the phone but would then put down straight away.

Everyone was against her - she was convinced my wife was planning to kill her.

With help of friend I got her assessed by doctor who concluded she was a danger to herself and others (this is after she tried to run someone over with her car).

Due to her volatile and extremely violent nature ended up having to call SAPS to go to her house / breaking open the door and forcefully remove her (took 4 policemen to get her out - she bit one so badly he needed stiches).

After 3 days in hospital for observation she was transferred to Falkenberg (mental hospital in CT) where she was for 8 months.

Even on meds she had to remain in facilities (that were kak expensive) - she was kicked out of 2 due to her violent behavior and ended up in a lock down dementia facility for a few years before she passed.

I ended up going through the high court to legally be appointed to be in charge of her person and finances (2 separate things you shared custody with a lawyer)

She was never completely diagnosed orher than the vascular dementia that developed later on but was treated for "personality disorder"

Personally I think she was paranoid/delusional with uncontrolled anger issues. Even heavy meds made no difference other than to sedate and make her "manageable".

On a side note - my wife was a clinical psychologist so she was able to give me a lot of insight and help me understand some people are just beyond help.

I hope that is not the case here but as has already been suggested get the Dr to make both the assessments and recommendations.

Sjo, that must have been horrible and sorry for your experience. Hopefully something can be done before it reaches that stage.

 

[lexity]

I had the same happen with my mother.

She shut everyone out - would not allow me in the house when I went to visit her.

Would answer the phone but would then put down straight away.

Everyone was against her - she was convinced my wife was planning to kill her.

With help of friend I got her assessed by doctor who concluded she was a danger to herself and others (this is after she tried to run someone over with her car).

Due to her volatile and extremely violent nature ended up having to call SAPS to go to her house / breaking open the door and forcefully remove her (took 4 policemen to get her out - she bit one so badly he needed stiches).

After 3 days in hospital for observation she was transferred to Falkenberg (mental hospital in CT) where she was for 8 months.

Even on meds she had to remain in facilities (that were kak expensive) - she was kicked out of 2 due to her violent behavior and ended up in a lock down dementia facility for a few years before she passed.

I ended up going through the high court to legally be appointed to be in charge of her person and finances (2 separate things you shared custody with a lawyer)

She was never completely diagnosed orher than the vascular dementia that developed later on but was treated for "personality disorder"

Personally I think she was paranoid/delusional with uncontrolled anger issues. Even heavy meds made no difference other than to sedate and make her "manageable".

On a side note - my wife was a clinical psychologist so she was able to give me a lot of insight and help me understand some people are just beyond help.

I hope that is not the case here but as has already been suggested get the Dr to make both the assessments and recommendations.

All violent behavior is criminal, so that's not easy to endure as family/friends, but it is easy to know what to do as the victim.

But I'm curious about her condition prior to it turning violent. You said she shut everyone out. Was angry, paranoid.

If it's not too personal, was she - or had she been on strong drugs - just prior to her shutting you out?

 

[OCP]

So sad .

Do you have any theories on why this suddenly happened to you mom?

In our case it was years of recreational drug abuse.

She was always a bit strange and extremely controlling.

Growing up I was not allowed to answer phone or front door. We moved 7 times for no reason.

Only when I became taller and stronger than her did she stop her violence towards me but was very bitter and angry with everyone.

As soon as I could I got out the house (at which point she wanted nothing more to do with me for "abandoning her")

She was an alcoholic and smoked like a chimney but no drugs that I was aware of.

Funny how often we had no food but she always had smokes and a few bottles hiding in her bedside cupboard...

 

[RedViking]

She was always a bit strange and extremely controlling.

Growing up I was not allowed to answer phone or front door. We moved 7 times for no reason.

Only when I became taller and stronger than her did she stop her violence towards me but was very bitter and angry with everyone.

As soon as I could I got out the house (at which point she wanted nothing more to do with me for "abandoning her")

She was an alcoholic and smoked like a chimney but no drugs that I was aware of.

Funny how often we had no food but she always had smokes and a few bottles hiding in her bedside cupboard...

I was going to mention bitterness. That is a cancer as well. I lived with a person that was extremely bitter and it was absolute hell. I don't care where she is today.

In my SIL's case she is completely out of character. She is generally very caring and always put others ahead of herself. A good mom. But since the chronic depression started a couple of years, and then just suddenly stopping the meds she is completely a different person. The meds made a MASSIVE positive difference and helps her cope with life. A lot has happened lately, difficult things, and being off the meds it's all just too much and I think she cracked. She said she was taking her meds but she lied. Nows she is a wreck.

 

[lexity]

I was going to mention bitterness. That is a cancer as well. I lived with a person that was extremely bitter and it was absolute hell. I don't care where she is today.

In my SIL's case she is completely out of character. She is generally very caring and always put others ahead of herself. A good mom. But since the chronic depression started a couple of years, and then just suddenly stopping the meds she is completely a different person. The meds made a MASSIVE positive difference and helps her cope with life. A lot has happened lately, difficult things, and being off the meds it's all just too much and I think she cracked. She said she was taking her meds but she lied. Nows she is a wreck.

'helps her cope with life'

Always read the fine print. You might then not be so surprised to find she wants to come off the stuff.

Coming off some of these drugs is hard-core. Because they are addictive. And it's too dangerous just to go cold turkey. Some do make it through cold turkey, but it's a case of Russian Roullette. It's far better to try to find someone with a little bit of experience in tapering the dose at a safe rate.

p.s. if she was doing ok, at one point, what made her go on to drugs? I mean everyone has their ups and downs in life. But deciding to go onto these drugs that don't require an objective medical diagnosis. Really risky stuff.

 

[RedViking]

'helps her cope with life'

Always read the fine print. You might then not be so surprised to find she wants to come off the stuff.

Coming off some of these drugs is hard-core. Because they are addictive. And it's too dangerous just to go cold turkey. Some do make it through cold turkey, but it's a case of Russian Roullette. It's far better to try to find someone with a little bit of experience in tapering the dose at a safe rate.

p.s. if she was doing ok, at one point, what made her go on to drugs? I mean everyone has their ups and downs in life. But deciding to go onto these drugs that don't require an objective medical diagnosis. Really risky stuff.

She wasn't doing OK until she got help and went on the meds.

 

[lexity]

She wasn't doing OK until she got help and went on the meds.

Were all the rudimentary ducks in a row(the ones mentioned earlier), when she starting doing badly?

 

[RedViking]

Where all the rudimentary ducks in a row, when she starting doing badly?

Probably not. I'm not sure. Just came back to chaos.

 

[Jings]

This has not been proven. For all that is known, increased levels of MOA-A in the brain may be cause by depression i.e. the other way around.

When you buy a season ticket, and eventually get an opportunity to go see a game, and your team scores... your catacalymides go through the roof.

Now, did those brain chemicals cause your elation? Or was is that you chose to support the goal scoring side, and that goal very much met with your approval, which resulted in elevated catacalymides/brainchemicals? Correlation is not causation.

Poor life circumstances cause depression. Many don't like to acknowledge their power of choice in how those circumstances develop. But even if other people are involved in deteriorating circumstances, you, the individual, are never a complete victim. Because even when you are a victim say of a mugging, you can learn how to avoid or better deal with whatever went wrong.

The mistake is to blame the brain.

I understand it's very tempting to relinquish responsibility.

But freedom and responsibility are two sides of the same coin. It is way too cavalier to permit yourself the 'luxury' of relinquishing decision-making responsibility.

Not too sure why you're saying it's not proven as scientists have isolated the expression in the MAOA gene which creates the brain anomalies, found in human X chromosome. Either the mother or father can pass it to offspring.

 

[lexity]

Not too sure why you're saying it's not proven as scientists have isolated the expression in the MAOA gene which creates the brain anomalies, found in human X chromosome. Either the mother or father can pass it to offspring.

Some scientist have the same aversion to individual responsibility as referred to earlier.

They are human beings too. They often have flawed logic, such as Circular reasoning.

It has been said that 50% or more of scientific studies are inaccurate and flawed. I think that came out during the lockdown fiasco. May have been from Ioannides.

Even if a 'depression gene' has been identified, it would be typical of well-connected scientists to pooh-pooh the notion that individuals are wiring and rewiring their genes all the time.

They're very quick to dismiss the individual by implying he's a passive factor in his biology.

This is the trouble when you put science in a position of privilege, that is not subject to open dissent. This is the Science (TM) we have.

And still, with an alleged depression gene, you still can't tell if a persons chemical changes caused his depression or the reverse.

 

[Jings]

Some scientist have the same aversion to individual responsibility as referred to earlier.

They are human beings too. They often have flawed logic, such as Circular reasoning.

It has been said that 50% or more of scientific studies are inaccurate and flawed. I think that came out during the lockdown fiasco. May have been from Ioannides.

Even if a 'depression gene' has been identified, it would be typical of well-connected scientists to pooh-pooh the notion that individuals are wiring and rewiring their genes all the time.

They're very quick to dismiss the individual by implying he's a passive factor in his biology.

This is the trouble when you put science in a position of privilege, that is not subject to open dissent. This is the Science (TM) we have.

And still, with an alleged depression gene, you still can't tell if a persons chemical changes caused his depression or the reverse.

What is the circular reasoning in isolating a gene? Perhaps I should have mentioned specifically clinical depression, including dysthymia, is genetic. Even the cause of ADD and ADHD is mostly genetic, along with many other brain related mental illnesses.

 

[lexity]

What is the circular reasoning in isolating a gene? Perhaps I should have mentioned specifically clinical depression, including dysthymia, is genetic. Even the cause of ADD and ADHD is mostly genetic, along with many other brain related mental illnesses.

Last I heard there was no objective biological lab test to confirm or deny any so-called 'mental disorder'.

And as soon as there is, it will instantly fall out of psyhiatry/psychology and into traditional medicine.

 

[Jings]

Last I heard there was no objective biological lab test to confirm or deny any so-called 'mental disorder'.

And as soon as there is, it will instantly fall out of psyhiatry/psychology and into traditional medicine.

What do you as a layman call a mental disorder?

 

[lexity]

What do you as a layman call a mental disorder?

I would call it a problem in living.

 

[Jings]

I would call it a problem in living.

And how would you classify people who don't know why they're chronically depressed and angry, or can't push through their sadness?

Take my SO for example, he's aware of being depressed and angry every day but unable to control it. Previously he used to numb those feelings with alcohol but after a second admission in rehab has managed to stay sober for close to five years now.

Unfortunately the Lexamil he'd been taking for over two years caused sexual side effects. He started contracting constant bladder infections and recently epididymo-orchitis but that's improved now that he's stopped the medication.

However, he's still stuck with depression which excercise and diet does nothing to alleviate. Blue lotus tea noticeably improves his mood but on any day he doesn't drink the tea he's back to negative thoughts.

Every single psychiatrist he's consulted since the 90s till now have diagnosed "depressive and generalized anxiety disorder".

 

[lexity]

And how would you classify people who don't know why they're chronically depressed and angry, or can't push through their sadness?

Take my SO for example, he's aware of being depressed and angry every day but unable to control it. Previously he used to numb those feelings with alcohol but after a second admission in rehab has managed to stay sober for close to five years now.

Unfortunately the Lexamil he'd been taking for over two years caused sexual side effects. He started contracting constant bladder infections and recently epididymo-orchitis but that's improved now that he's stopped the medication.

However, he's still stuck with depression which excercise and diet does nothing to alleviate. Blue lotus tea noticeably improves his mood but on any day he doesn't drink the tea he's back to negative thoughts.

Every single psychiatrist he's consulted since the 90s till now have diagnosed "depressive and generalized anxiety disorder".

Obviously I can't say because I don't know him from a bar of soap, and these problems are deeply personal.

But if he can't see the object of his anger i.e. no pattern, when it happens, it could be something in his environment that is triggering him. Something or someone.

Past upsets don't just resolve on their own. They can follow you, by way of present-time memory-triggers. You would be none-the-wiser unless you were aware of the similarities between present-time stimulant and the past incident.

Alwyas start with the obvious stuff as mentioned earlier, though. It's seems silly but you'd be surprised to find how much trouble one can get into when just a couple of things goes out. If it's none of that then it could be a highly-charged emotional memory-trigger.

 

[Jings]

Obviously I can't say because I don't know him from a bar of soap, and these problems are deeply personal.

But if he can't see the object of his anger i.e. no pattern, when it happens, it could be something in his environment that is triggering him. Something or someone.

Past upsets don't just resolve on their own. They can follow you, by way of present-time memory-triggers. You would be none-the-wiser unless you were aware of the similarities between present-time stimulant and the past incident.

Alwyas start with the obvious stuff as mentioned earlier, though. It's seems silly but you'd be surprised to find how much trouble one can get into when just a couple of things goes out. If it's none of that then it could be a highly-charged emotional memory-trigger.

Well I do know him and he's moved past a lot of issues in his life. When he's feeling good though his mood changes and negative thoughts creep in.
His mother also seemed to suffer from depression although she didn't seek treatment for mental illness except for the time she had PMC after a short hospital stay. Also a brother who has regular depressive episodes, lives with their sister. His sister and other brother have fortunately not been affected by depression. Not that they didn't have reason because each have had their fair share of battles in life.

 

[The Voice]

So I’ve struggled with sciatica for the last 9 months (was basically crawling around because I couldn’t walk at a stage). I was put on a nerve blocker called pregabalin. It’s basically anxiety/epilepsy medication they figured out can also block nerve pain by disrupting the signals to the brain. Didn’t work all that well, but because of my history I eventually decided I needed to get off it when I started having suicidal thoughts: one of the side effects, it seems. I was on 600mg at the time, and had to wean myself off it because it’s apparently also highly addictive (I found that out the hard way when I tried going from 150mg to zero and nearly went of my head).

I was then put on its cousin, gabapentin, and wouldn’t you know it, it hasn’t worked, either, and depression has started creeping in, so I’m currently weaning off it, too.

Having survived my clinical depression, I’d rather just live with the pain I’m in until I can get an injection from the pain clinic.

Makes you wonder, though, how many other pharmaceuticals actually make people depressed without them realising it?