Please help :( i dont know what to do anymore

Stillie said:
and school fees, insurance petrol...............
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Make her move out.

Never let your child come short, so pay for her requirements.
The mom can pay other rent or share rent and other expenses with a friend if she "can't share the same space with you.
 
CamiKaze said:
Now you see... people think that I'm an AHole because I want someone in my life that contributes just as much... Buuuut no, she is a female and it is the role of the man to provide and offer a free ride through life. :erm:

Then you still get thrown out of your own house... nah dude... go home.
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There are some things that are not evenly balanced.

Can you carry or give birth to a child, or even breast feed it?

There are often imbalances, but if they even out the judge's scale then all should be considered equal.


Life has many grey areas.
 
You have the balls to not use a throwaway account, so I think you have the balls get through this! Chin up and chest out, soldier!
 
Honestly, take the pain now and end this. Do not prolong it, you will lose years of your life trying to make this work all the while she will be unhappy which in turn will make you unhappy. Also don't try and stay together for your daughter, children pick up on things and an unhappy family is not a nice environment for a child to grow up in.

Whatever you do, I wish you the best of luck.
 
Deadmanza said:
Honestly, take the pain now and end this. Do not prolong it, you will lose years of your life trying to make this work all the while she will be unhappy which in turn will make you unhappy. Also don't try and stay together for your daughter, children pick up on things and an unhappy family is not a nice environment for a child to grow up in.

Whatever you do, I wish you the best of luck.
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i've thought about this as well. When she told me to leave she was oddly calm about it, which makes me think she is done. At one point i said i cannot stay in this state of limbo not knowing our status and that i need to make financial decisions that will affect my future if she doesnt want to continue this, her response directly after that was "is that wat u want" like she is try to get me to end it and she doesnt have the pluck to do it. Thats how all this has come across to me, she wants to end it but either, wants me to pull the trigger, or she just cant do it her self
 
Personally I wouldn't wanna be with someone who doesn't want to be around me... It's probably easier to see this from a neutral perspective, but you need to let her go as soon as possible so that the healing can begin. No use fixing it up (if that's even possible) just for the kids, and ending up being resented way more a few years later.
 
Ho3n3r said:
Personally I wouldn't wanna be with someone who doesn't want to be around me... It's probably easier to see this from a neutral perspective, but you need to let her go as soon as possible so that the healing can begin. No use fixing it up (if that's even possible) just for the kids, and ending up being resented way more a few years later.
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yea i agree on not staying together for the kids, it will just create a hostile environment which will make it worse for the kids
 
Sorry to say but it sounds like its all over. She has made up her mind already. (Points finger to work colleague)

You will make your life a misery trying to make it work.
 
Sorry to break it to you. She's getting knobbed by the co-worker.

You have 3 choices:
1. Make it abundantly clear you don't like the relationship she's having with the co-worker she needs to choose
2. Chase her the fark out of the house and tell her it's over
3. Be ok with it and have a 3 some

That's it really.

Tough spot to be in, but get it out in the open and deal with it for the sanity of both of you. Whatever happens it would be for the best in the long run for your kid.
 
BTW Are you back home yet?! You pay the rent - get back there now even if you sleep on the couch.

Is she doesn't like it then there's the door.
 
Stop stressing Stillie. You don't need someone in your life who doesn't need you in theirs. Make up your mind that it's over and start figuring out your next steps. She's already ahead of you on that.
 
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Stillie said:
i've thought about this as well. When she told me to leave she was oddly calm about it, which makes me think she is done. At one point i said i cannot stay in this state of limbo not knowing our status and that i need to make financial decisions that will affect my future if she doesnt want to continue this, her response directly after that was "is that wat u want" like she is try to get me to end it and she doesnt have the pluck to do it. Thats how all this has come across to me, she wants to end it but either, wants me to pull the trigger, or she just cant do it her self
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It is over, she has moved on...you basically the only one in that relationship. It's a hard reality to absorb, but the sooner you come to terms with it the better. It hard to be the bigger person, but for your own sanity and long term benefit, do not turn into the monster that some are recommending. When affection and love has left, it has left...like a death has occurred. Strongs man, its a bitch, I know....but you will come out of this stronger.
 
Another man ... sounds about right. The symptoms are there.

IMHO.. file for divorce. No worth playing 2nd fiddle to another man.

And it will get better dude. Kids adapt, you will see kiddo like you want. You wife will realise that the kid in her way when she wants to shag the boyfriend, and send the kiddo to you more.

Divorce is not the end of life.. it's start to a new life.
 
Tell her tonight you are filing for divorce and see her reaction. You don't need this grey cloud over your head.

The only person that matters in your life now is your daughter.
 
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