Obvious answer of course, but your response is obvious.
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Relationship Advice?!?!?!?
- Thread starter Venus69
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Obvious answer of course, but your response is obvious.
Hamster
Resident Rodent
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How old are you guys?
And I'm being serious about the "obvious" answer. If she gets upset because you don't want her posting pics of her and other men then she's kinda stupid, oblvious, immature or really not that into you.
And no relationship is worth the pain of constantly worrying. You either trust her or you don't.
Just shag her relentlessly, and enact all your perverted fantasies (as much as she will allow at the time). Carry on until she breaks up with you in disgust
The_Ogre
Honorary Master
Invite a few of your buddies too. "Forget" to tell her about this beforehand.Just shag her relentlessly, and enact all your perverted fantasies (as much as she will allow at the time). Carry on until she breaks up with you in disgust
Hamster
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Just shag her relentlessly, and enact all your perverted fantasies (as much as she will allow at the time). Carry on until she breaks up with you in disgust
...as wrong as this is... whatever, ask forgiveness later :twisted:
GoneWithTheWindows
Honorary Master
Always find these threads a little pointless. If it has come to the point where you need to start a thread, move on. Regardless of what people advise you, you already know what you are going to do either way.
I'm trying to stay within the boundaries of the law....
Hey, as long as its consensual I think it's as right as rain! Plus, you never know how dirty you can get until you try and go there..
The_Ogre
Honorary Master
Imagine if she grins and says "yes" when the guys waltz in half nakedI'm trying to stay within the boundaries of the law....
I'm 32 and she's 25. She's mature for someone her age, i.e. she's an associate director at where she works.
Good point about being in a relationsip where one constantly worries.
Agreed! All I wanted to know is if I'm being unreasonable to be uncomfortable and upset if she posts a picture of her guy friend.
GoneWithTheWindows
Honorary Master
Fair enough, I wouldn't personally have been to happy about it.
Imagine if she grins and says "yes" when the guys waltz in half naked
Well, I'd prefer it if it was "when the girls waltz in"....
Maybe she is acting out because of the stress at work, it can be tough to be a young executive. I used to be the CEO of a beverage supply business. The company went under after labour and supply chain issues became too much. This really caused friction in our house, mainly because my mom didn't want to buy and juice lemons for me anymore...
SaiyanZ
Executive Member
Please allow me to hijack this thread
So I have dated my current girlfriend for almost 4 months now, and I have a simple question:
- Is it appropriate or not appropriate for my girlfriend to post a picture of her guy friend on instagram? The guy friend happens to be her ex-boyfriend by the way. But they dated for 2 weeks about 2 years ago. The picture that she posted is of her having a video conversation via IMO (Skype like video calling app) and she took a picture, or a screenshot, of her and her guy friend. The guy friend's face happens to occupy like 90% of the photo, while my girlfriend's face occupies 10% of the photo or screenshot on the top left hand corner. The reason she posted the picture, and video called her guy friend, is because it was his birthday. What made me even mre unsettled is that she has never posted a picture of any of her other guy or lady friends on Instagram. Ever!
I told her the picture makes me extremely uncomfortable, and we had a huge fight about it. I then decided to not follow her on Instagram anymore (she has a private account) since she refused to delete the picture. I unfollowed her so she can be free to do whatever she wants without risking upsetting me. But I was extremely hurt and felt like she disrespected me. She posted 2 pictures of me on her Instagram, reffering me as "KindBae". The guyfriend knows that I am her boyfriend.
I am an introvert, and she is extremely extroverted and very outgoind.
Am I being unreasonable in being uncomfortable and upset about what she has done? Is it normal for girlfriends to post pictures of their ex boyfriends or guyfriends with "heart" symbols all over the place?
This was pretty much why I split up with my last gf. She would post pics of her with her guy friends (not ex's) on facebook. I told her a few times that I didn't like it. She would then delete the pics but after a while she would do it again. I didn't like it mainly because there there were no pics of me and her online as she preferred to keep her relationship details private. We were together for a couple years (all our close friends and family knew that we were together, just not distant facebook acquaintances) but I eventually got too annoyed with the facebook pictures so I might have blew things out of proportion as the frustration slowly built up inside me. Of course her friends supported and convinced her that she was doing nothing "wrong" so I said "**** it" and just left. That was three years ago and we haven't been in touch since.
I have read your subsequent posts Sly. Your G/F is not mature. She sounds like she is playing stupid games. Posting uncharacteristic pictures makes all of this very suspicious. The not accepting calls on Saturday night is also very suspicious if there is a trend (and think carefully here). You have mentioned it to her that this makes you uncomfortable, which turned into a fight, so she is not seeing your point of view. Cut ties and move on. Relationships are all about compromise and if she cannot suck it up and realise she is hurting you, she is not worth it.
Also, for future reference, calling multiple times on a Saturday night is very turnoff'ish. Don't do that. It comes across as desperate. I really hate games in relationships, but it seems like it's a thing in the current dating sphere and woman can treat men really badly. It's the whole reason the whole manosphere sprouted up. If she really is into you, you don't need to keep calling her, she will call back. Call or message once. Call one more time the next day, and then leave it there.
However, I dated a very controlling and manipulative person for 2 years. It was terrible. He would try control my every move. I couldn't stay out late for drinks after work (like 8pm), I couldn't go out for lunch with a male colleague and I wasn't allowed to go out at night unsupervised with other female friends (like a Metallica concert for example). If you are doing anything like this, you are in the wrong and you should speak to someone about your behaviour. I am not saying you are, but we could only be getting fed a small portion of the story.
Please allow me to hijack this thread
So I have dated my current girlfriend for almost 4 months now, and I have a simple question:
- Is it appropriate or not appropriate for my girlfriend to post a picture of her guy friend on instagram? The guy friend happens to be her ex-boyfriend by the way. But they dated for 2 weeks about 2 years ago. The picture that she posted is of her having a video conversation via IMO (Skype like video calling app) and she took a picture, or a screenshot, of her and her guy friend. The guy friend's face happens to occupy like 90% of the photo, while my girlfriend's face occupies 10% of the photo or screenshot on the top left hand corner. The reason she posted the picture, and video called her guy friend, is because it was his birthday. What made me even mre unsettled is that she has never posted a picture of any of her other guy or lady friends on Instagram. Ever!
I told her the picture makes me extremely uncomfortable, and we had a huge fight about it. I then decided to not follow her on Instagram anymore (she has a private account) since she refused to delete the picture. I unfollowed her so she can be free to do whatever she wants without risking upsetting me. But I was extremely hurt and felt like she disrespected me. She posted 2 pictures of me on her Instagram, reffering me as "KindBae". The guyfriend knows that I am her boyfriend.
I am an introvert, and she is extremely extroverted and very outgoind.
Am I being unreasonable in being uncomfortable and upset about what she has done? Is it normal for girlfriends to post pictures of their ex boyfriends or guyfriends with "heart" symbols all over the place?
Dude. Wtf. Being an introvert has nothing to do with this scenario. Being insecure does. The reality is she's with you while she's with you, so just enjoy it. If she's looking to jump ship being all controlling and possessive isn't going to help your case.
Calling every hour on the hour is a bit much, but yes, it does sound that either:
a) she's cheating on you
b) your neediness is driving her away
c) your neediness is driving her away and she's pushing your buttons while she's at it
Thanks for the replies guys,
Quick Update:
So we had a huge fight today, and she ended up breaking up with me. I'm actually relieved that she did it, it has been a stressful few weeks.
We acknowledged that we're too different, and that I have huge insecurity and jealousy issues.
The fight started when she said I should have told her to delete the instagram picture if it bothered me that much. I didn't tell her to delete it then because I won't allow myself to be a controlling boyfriend. I'm bad enough that I'm possessive, jealous & insecure.
So, I decided to call her bluff. I told her she can delete it right then and there. She asked me how I'll find out as my instagram account is deleted, and I told her she shouldn't worry. My plan was to check the number of posts. Once there's a decrease by 1 photo then I'd know she deleted something, then I'd ask for a screen shot.
She kept dodging until she said she'll never allow me to dictate what she must or mustn't do. And then told me we'll never work out and then dumped me.
So we decided to be friends, we'll see how it goes. I still love her, but we will never work out as a couple. I'm glad it's over between us.
She admitted that she planned to break up with me this week, after she heals. I'm okay with that, even though I see that as a bit selfish.
I asked her if she's ever been unfaithful while with me, and she said no. I figured I could ask her because she had absolutely nothing to lose since it's over and there's absolutely nothing attaching me to her. I think she's telling the truth, but I'll never know for sure. If she's telling the truth, then my jealousy and insecurities problem is going to destroy me.
Quick Update:
So we had a huge fight today, and she ended up breaking up with me. I'm actually relieved that she did it, it has been a stressful few weeks.
We acknowledged that we're too different, and that I have huge insecurity and jealousy issues.
The fight started when she said I should have told her to delete the instagram picture if it bothered me that much. I didn't tell her to delete it then because I won't allow myself to be a controlling boyfriend. I'm bad enough that I'm possessive, jealous & insecure.
So, I decided to call her bluff. I told her she can delete it right then and there. She asked me how I'll find out as my instagram account is deleted, and I told her she shouldn't worry. My plan was to check the number of posts. Once there's a decrease by 1 photo then I'd know she deleted something, then I'd ask for a screen shot.
She kept dodging until she said she'll never allow me to dictate what she must or mustn't do. And then told me we'll never work out and then dumped me.
So we decided to be friends, we'll see how it goes. I still love her, but we will never work out as a couple. I'm glad it's over between us.
She admitted that she planned to break up with me this week, after she heals. I'm okay with that, even though I see that as a bit selfish.
I asked her if she's ever been unfaithful while with me, and she said no. I figured I could ask her because she had absolutely nothing to lose since it's over and there's absolutely nothing attaching me to her. I think she's telling the truth, but I'll never know for sure. If she's telling the truth, then my jealousy and insecurities problem is going to destroy me.
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