The Football Association today proudly unveiled Total, **** and UPS as
the new sponsors of the England football team. 'The combination of these
three corporate giants perfectly captures the ethos of the England side,'
said an FA spokesman. 'After all, they had nothing in the tank when it
counted, and they've proved themselves to be a bunch of expensive posers
who always fail to deliver.'
The announcement followed the news that Nationwide building society would
be ending its sponsorship of the national side after the FA rejected its
pre-World Cup offer of a new £20m deal. 'Not so ****ing cocky now, are
you?' said Nationwide in a prepared statement yesterday, before
respectfully suggesting that the FA 'shoved its sponsorship deal right up
it's a@se'. Pundits noted that if the FA followed Nationwide's advice, it
would be the second time in a fortnight that England had been laid wide
open at the back.
The new shirts come in a range of bright 'easy to spot' colours after
claims from England players that the old kit was painted in 'magic
invisible ink' which made it impossible to pick out an easy and obvious
pass to a team mate. The new shirts are also made of a super lightweight
material, unlike the old tops which were apparently made of extra-heavy
chain mail which left the Premiership stars lumbering around looking
exhausted and unfit.
However, one criticism has been made of the design of the new England kit
with claims that the neck hole was inexplicably too small for the heads
of the Premiership stars. Players say this will make it very hard to pull
the shirt off during an over-exuberant goal celebration, but a spokesman
for the manufacturers said 'we don't envisage this being a problem.'
http://mybroadband.co.za/photos/showphoto.php?photo=17087&cat=500
the new sponsors of the England football team. 'The combination of these
three corporate giants perfectly captures the ethos of the England side,'
said an FA spokesman. 'After all, they had nothing in the tank when it
counted, and they've proved themselves to be a bunch of expensive posers
who always fail to deliver.'
The announcement followed the news that Nationwide building society would
be ending its sponsorship of the national side after the FA rejected its
pre-World Cup offer of a new £20m deal. 'Not so ****ing cocky now, are
you?' said Nationwide in a prepared statement yesterday, before
respectfully suggesting that the FA 'shoved its sponsorship deal right up
it's a@se'. Pundits noted that if the FA followed Nationwide's advice, it
would be the second time in a fortnight that England had been laid wide
open at the back.
The new shirts come in a range of bright 'easy to spot' colours after
claims from England players that the old kit was painted in 'magic
invisible ink' which made it impossible to pick out an easy and obvious
pass to a team mate. The new shirts are also made of a super lightweight
material, unlike the old tops which were apparently made of extra-heavy
chain mail which left the Premiership stars lumbering around looking
exhausted and unfit.
However, one criticism has been made of the design of the new England kit
with claims that the neck hole was inexplicably too small for the heads
of the Premiership stars. Players say this will make it very hard to pull
the shirt off during an over-exuberant goal celebration, but a spokesman
for the manufacturers said 'we don't envisage this being a problem.'
http://mybroadband.co.za/photos/showphoto.php?photo=17087&cat=500
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