There should have been no third party until the divorce was finalised. The start of this new relationship will always be questionable in the eyes of everyone else, no matter what you say.
If your wife not working was the cause, HTF are you going to survive now with 2 women (maybe second one works, but still) to support and no assets?
The other girl was in your life before the divorce..... meaning your wife can blame the divorce on her whether you live with her or not.Originally Posted by Speedyson
I don't understand how someone can be blamed for a divorce. If they're not interested in you anymore, they're not interested. I don't get it. You're going to blame her for being more appealing to your husband than you are? Sue him for betraying the commitment but no need for her to be involved.
It's going to be really difficult for the wife to sue the girlfriend for alienation of affection if she cannot prove that the other woman was directly responsible for the breakdown of the marriage. If the marriage was at all rocky before the girlfriend came along then it's going to be difficult to prove.
"Le mieux est l'ennemi du bien." FM Arouet
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke
"Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience" Unknown
"your honor I agreed to the trial separation because I really wanted this to work out. I thought if we had a little time apart we could clear our heads and start work things out and save our marriage. Then that tart came along and ended that hope"
What you've done is confirm there were pre-existing problems in the marriage. From my understanding, and INAL, the "tart" has to actively pursue the happily married party for the spouse to claim alienation of affection.
"Le mieux est l'ennemi du bien." FM Arouet
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke
"Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience" Unknown
http://www.saflii.org/za/cases/ZAGPHC/2005/67.html
Looks like even if there was no evidence of enticement the defendant can lose on balance of probabilities
+1
What I said when I got divorced. I also never understood the saying "walk a mile in another man's shoes" till my divorce - the hard part is your going to get judged by many who think they are only trying to be helpful. But you will also change your opinion of those who have made your discision.
One thing I learn't from my divorce with regards to kids is that there is no perfect resolve and everybody needs to accept that life is tough. That said, in my situation my daughter would have suffered more had my ex and I remained together (something we both admitted).
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This is supposed to be a free country .If you dont want to be married to some one no one can force you to be married WTF.So called morals aside, do what you want to do ,Much condemnation here .....walk in the mans shoes then condemn him...to much supposition and down right anger because other people have been supposedly wronged in their own lives.
People are getting emotional about the OPs predicament ,,lighten up you will live longer .
If it walks like a duck and kwaks like a duck ..its a duck
@OP
So tell us what makes this new woman so special and why things went sour with your wife.Some background info will go a long way in resolving this issue legally.
And why have you settled for so little out of the situation.She got everything so what more does she want.
There are only 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't.
Well ummm good luck dude
I have been on the other side. My wife had an affair which ended our marriage (which was probably a bit broken in the first place to be honest)
The right thing to do is to end a marriage properly before entering into another relationship. Don't blur the lines.
"The defendant did not take the trouble to defend the action so that the Court could also hear his version." Kinda silly if you ask me.
"Le mieux est l'ennemi du bien." FM Arouet
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke
"Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience" Unknown
All I know is I would never do something like this. I wouldn't even agree to a trial separation. I would drag her ass to marriage counselling. From all that has been said, from the OP's mouth nonetheless, is that he was the cause of this in the first place (maybe with his stupid view point that the mother of his children should go out and work?).
/sarcasm time/ Yea, he REALLY wanted to work on this marriage, because during the trial separation he got together with the 3rd party.
I also don't believe him when he says it only happened when they were separated. It's awful fast for a MARRIED MAN to jump from "I'm married" to "Hey, no I'm not". It's the same way some women operate. They find someone else and shut down emotionally while they're with their current boyfriend. They may not cheat in the literal sense of the word, but their mind has already been made up that it won't work and that there is someone else they like better now. This then forces the other party to bring up the questions re: affection and "how it was" and "how they are treated" which leads to fights and eventually the other party being the one saying "Fine, it's over". The woman walks away from the relationship being able to say "I didn't break up with him, he broke up with me" and almost immediately starts dating the new guy waiting in the rafters.
Now, that scenario I painted for you happens with both sexes (more often than you think) and this is why I don't believe him. He had the new gf wait around, knew that he had someone new, and jumped on the opportunity for a trial separation because that would mean they could go out on a date officially. In his mind things were already over by the time the trial separation dragged itself into reality because of the new gf. Even though you didn't physically/literally cheat, that doesn't mean she didn't cause an "alienation of affection"
All your wife needs to prove is that you've known each other before the trial separation.
"Lighten up you will live longer"
WHO THE **** says I want to live longer with pieces of **** like this walking around? How many more women is he going to impregnate and leave just because he didn't have the balls to work on his marriage? People are so fickle these days.
Nothing in this life should be easy. Nor should it fall in your lap. If it does, then you're a very lucky person. But most of us have to work hard at these things. Most of us even work hard on this for our entirely lives and never achieve it.
@Acid, it did only happen once the trial separation started. Before the trial separation had started, I had already made up my mind about my wife. I'm not going to say the exact reason for why things went sour in the first place because it's a personal thing that I couldn't accept.
In any event, someone asked why I want to leave this marriage with no assets etc. The reason is becuase the kids will be with my wife and I want everything to be the same for them eg: same car, same everything and I am in a position that I can build myself up going forward. I don't have to do it but if I don't, then mother in law is going to take this further with wifey and I'm not looking forward to that.
I will update once I have some legal opinion, not for the benefit of anyone wanting to know, but for the benefit that it might help someone reading this forum in a few years from now or so.
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